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Thread: Offensive landscaping - fact or phallacy?

  1. #1
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Offensive landscaping - fact or phallacy?

    From the Santa Cruz Sentinel

    May 8, 2002


    Gillian Greensite's sculptred eugenia shrubs are an eyesore for some of her neighbors.
    Sentinel Photo by Dan Coyro
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Fact or fallacy: Sexy tree too much for some Westside neighbors
    By DAN WHITE
    Sentinel staff writer
    A Westside resident called the cops Monday to report an allegedly phallic tree.

    Officers responded to the Liberty Street home but found no wrongdoing. They said the 20-footer — actually an evergreen hedge of the Luma genus — is protected by its owner’s right to artistic freedom.

    "We contacted the city attorney," said Sgt. Brad Goodwin. "It could be interpreted anywhere from being free speech to being artistic. It’s really nothing we have control over."

    All trees can be seen as "phallic," but some would argue this eugenia is especially so. Viewed from the front, the hedge looks to have testicles, or perhaps bosoms.

    Eugenia is a common plant noted for white flowers and edible fruits, according to the Sunset Western Garden Book. Sunset says the plant "performs best" in well-drained soil.

    The owner of the tree, Gillian Greensite, said she found it peculiar the plant has been there at least 15 years and suddenly someone is mad about it. She said no one has complained to her about the plant.

    Greensite, director of UC Santa Cruz’s rape prevention and counseling program, also questioned what the offended neighbor was really seeing in this tree.

    "If they want to see phallic, they see phallic, I guess. I see trees," said Greensite, an outspoken advocate of tree preservation in the city.

    She added the eugenia was "not trimmed for any particular purpose."

    The complaining neighbor could not be reached for comment Tuesday.

    A second neighbor, who asked that her name not be used, said she found the tree irksome but has grown "numb" to it over the years. But she said it’s annoying to "all of a sudden hear kids screeching and laughing about the tree.

    "They’re good neighbors, believe me," she said, referring to Greensite’s household. "(But) we have older folks around here."

    The neighbor also said the tree has become a beacon for annoying sightseers.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  2. #2
    Cyburbian Jen's avatar
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    Edwina scissorhands

    Those are funny!!!

    Not so phallic, now if she was gonna trim a cap on top then those twin towers would be tough to swallow - however its a tree not a nude.

    For some folks portals to porn can be found anywhere

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    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Re: Edwina scissorhands

    Jen wrote:
    Not so phallic, now if she was gonna trim a cap on top then those twin towers would be tough to swallow
    Ba-dum! (Crash!)
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  4. #4
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    Woody plants are only the tip of the problem. This morning I had two robins fornicating in my front yard. Where will it all end?

  5. #5
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Michael Stumpf wrote:
    Woody plants are only the tip of the problem.
    Ba-dum! (Crash!)

    Ba-dum! (Crash!)
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  6. #6
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
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    Heh heh...

    If those were my trees, I'd have a real hard time cutting them down... even if I were facing a stiff fine.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  7. #7

    Eye of the beholder

    Well, well, well. A new week and we are already pouring on the puns. Another tribute to landscaping as a protected art form is below. Say it with Flowers!

  8. #8
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Re: Heh heh...

    Mastiff wrote:
    If those were my trees, I'd have a real hard time cutting them down... even if I were facing a stiff fine.
    Ba-dum! (Crash!)

    Ba-dum! (Crash!)
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  9. #9
    Member Nemesis's avatar
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    Please rap them with proper protection from the elements. There are some sprays that can help with bug infestation.
    The owners should keep up the good work.

  10. #10
    maudit anglais
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    *Groan*

    Please, you're just encouraging Dan

  11. #11
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Nemesis wrote:
    Please wrap them with proper protection from the elements.
    Ba-dum! (Crash!)
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  12. #12
    maudit anglais
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    See what I mean...

  13. #13
    Member Nemesis's avatar
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    I first thought this was a preview scene from the new Edward Scissorhand II movie. But realized it was from the HGTV show Trading Spaces episode number 45 "When designers go bad"

  14. #14
    Member Nemesis's avatar
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    I checked my Tivo and it should be episode 69.

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