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Thread: The Freaks Come Out at Night

  1. #1
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    The Freaks Come Out at Night

    Whoever wrote that song was absolutely right.
    I closed a bar in downtown Kalamazoo on Saturday night (I fall asleep in front of the tv after watching Lawrence Welk and having my hot toddy at 7:30 most Saturdays). Now normally life in the city of Kalamazoo is pretty standard heartland stuff - there's always a 4H function going on, the ladies' sewing cirlcle produces many fine stitcheries, Leave it to Beaver music is piped in on the p.a. system through town, rotary club meetings 6 days/week. But even here in this land of the banal if you walk the city streets at night you can't help but feeling like you're in a Doors song. People look strange, dress strange, and act strange in the wee hours; there's just no way around it. Exactly what qualifies as a freak is maybe the subject of some debate, but I think you know what I mean. It must say right on the back of any Freaks Local 127 Union card "Only make public appearance (as a freak) between the hours of 11:00 pm and 4 am".
    Why do the freaks tend to come out at night? I suppose one reason might be if you're doing something illegal it's harder for the cops to see...but on the other hand it seems that because there are fewer people around at night, one's attention is drawn all that much more to the people you do see. Hmmm....
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

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    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    They come out at night because (pick one):
    a) they are all horrible insomniacs who sleep during the day and are up all night (oh, wait...that would describe ME :-C )
    b) night time has a different psychological "flavor" that helps them let their hair down
    c) they figure all the "nice" people are asleep so they are less likely to be hassled for being Freaks.
    d) They don't just come out at night -- you just don't notice them amidst the daytime crowds.

  3. #3
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    All good answers but I'd also like to point out that sometimes we can change roles. Perfectly normal people through no fault of their own can also end up in the 'freak' camp by virtue of being in the wrong place at the wrong time - Example: guy mugged/knocked on the head/stripped naked at 2am.... comes to thinking 'whoah, I gotta get home and get some clothes on'. Trouble is home is 5 miles away and its 2 am.....
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

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    Cyburbian Richmond Jake's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister
    ...(snip) Example: guy mugged/knocked on the head/stripped naked at 2am.... comes to thinking 'whoah, I gotta get home and get some clothes on'. Trouble is home is 5 miles away and its 2 am.....
    Oh, weedhopper: Do you speak from experience?
    Annoyingly insensitive

  5. #5
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by RichmondJake
    Oh, weedhopper: Do you speak from experience?
    For comedic value I was going to say 'Yes, I speak from experience - I've knocked many guys senseless and taken their clothes off' but it occurs to me that that's probably MORE humiliating than saying one was the victim in this case....
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

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    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister
    For comedic value I was going to say 'Yes, I speak from experience - I've knocked many guys senseless and taken their clothes off' but it occurs to me that that's probably MORE humiliating than saying one was the victim in this case....
    Now, if you were a woman, it might have more prestige value due to the double-entendre....

  7. #7
    Cyburbian Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    A good friend's older son is into the black clothing and make-up, as are his friends. She's told him that as long as he's living in her home, he can't dress up around the house and can't let his little brother see him or his friends like that, so he only goes out at night after the younger is in bed.

  8. #8
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    I don't really understand why a mom (or dad) would make a rule like that. I have rules like "You can have your hair as long as you want it, but you must keep it CLEAN. If it is clean, it is your hair and you can wear it how you like. Grow it down to your butt, if that's what you want." Their dad -- who had shoulder length hair when I met him, partly in rebellion against his own controlling career-military father -- used to try to make our boys get hair cuts just because he felt their hair was "too long". That only makes them more determined than ever to defy him. When they were little, I used to make them get haircuts when their hair got too long for them to keep it clean. That was a logical, purposeful rule they could understand and they respected my reasons for enforcing it.

    This year, my oldest is finally able to keep his hair clean enough that he has grown it to his shoulders. My youngest has super-thick, curly hair that you cannot get a brush through when it gets long and he looks great in a flat-top. So he prefers to keep it short. Either way, what they look like is a non-issue with me. My oldest also has long fingernails and always hated getting his nails cut, even as a baby. He shaves about once a week, so he usually has just enough facial hair to look like a half-transformed were-wolf. He wears red-rimmed glasses and most of his shirts are orange or yellow, which he merrily pairs with shorts in colors like silver or black. He no longer owns a pair of shoes. Instead, he has two pairs of sandals. Basically, I live with someone who looks like a freak full-time. I wish he would shave more often. The were-wolf effect is kind of gnarly. lol. Other than that: so?

    Of course, if "freakishness" bothered me, the child wouldn't have been born: Mr. Zone used to dress exclusively in black (when he wasn't in uniform). The effect was rather vampiric, what with his blonde hair, blue eyes, and pale skin (he is half Norse and looks just like a viking, but without the gigantic height and build, ). He has light sensitive eyes, so he wears sunglasses constantly. With 21 years of taking him shopping and teaching him how to dress, he now dresses very stylishly -- in black or gray, with the occasional wine-red or olive green shirt thrown in to brighten things up.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    Well, I think it's mostly because the older boy is somewhat of a cross-dresser, and his mom doesn't want the younger boy to see that. We are, after all, in a somewhat regressive small southern town. Plus, the mom's ex-would totally freak. He's a firefighter and very anal, very traditional.

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    -Ever still been out drinkin when the sun is coming up? There's a good reason we call it "God's Flashlight"

  11. #11
    Cyburbian JNL's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Chet
    -Ever still been out drinkin when the sun is coming up?
    Better still, cycling home in a German town as the sun comes up after a night out dancing and er, maybe a couple of drinks o Breakfast from the fish markets as they're setting up :-}

    Speaking of freaks coming out at night, it was only 2 nights ago that I was in town in a bright fuschia 80s dress with lace glove and multiple strands of beads, patterned stockings, domed stiletto boots and side pony-tail...

    I had been at an 80s party

    Edit: why's the angel smiley not working? o Don't tell me only truly angelic people are able to use it!!

  12. #12
    Cyburbian donk's avatar
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    Maybe electric blue hair dye looks like it is black in natural sunlight?
    Too lazy to beat myself up for being to lazy to beat myself up for being too lazy to... well you get the point....

  13. #13
    Cyburbian biscuit's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by donk
    Maybe electric blue hair dye looks like it is black in natural sunlight?
    Nah, I've had electic blue hair and sunlight only makes it look worse... not black

    I remember walking around Charleston at 4 in the morning (from late night Bible study of course ) and seeing all of these goth kids in black sweaters, full make-up and dark wool pants. And being that it was Charleston in August (at least 90F with 90% humidity), I didn't think they looked like freaks as much as they looked like complete morons.

  14. #14
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    OK, dying your hair any color (except to hide gray) if you're male qualifies as 'freak'. Females: dying your hair green, blue, purple, that phosphorescent red or yellow qualifies as 'freak'........how many freaks out there by this definition?
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister
    OK, dying your hair any color (except to hide gray) if you're male qualifies as 'freak'. Females: dying your hair green, blue, purple, that phosphorescent red or yellow qualifies as 'freak'........how many freaks out there by this definition?
    Not me, my hair is age appropriate thin with more than age appropriate gray.
    length above the collar.

    Comb overs are weird/bad looking.

  16. #16
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Wait a second... I was downtown late on Saturday &%(*& are you calling me a freak? (don't answer that)

    I agree and I think that it is because some people feel more comfortable in nocturnal situations.
    "The alternate domination of one faction over another, sharpened by the spirit of revenge, natural to party dissension, which in different ages and countries has perpetrated the most horrid enormities, is itself a frightful despotism." - George Washington

  17. #17
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    Wait a second... I was downtown late on Saturday &%(*& are you calling me a freak? (don't answer that)
    Oh that was you I saw clad in the unitard body suit and the leash next to that large shirtless gentleman at 2 am?
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  18. #18
    Cyburbian el Guapo's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Michele Zone
    I don't really understand why a mom (or dad) would make a rule like that.....
    [el Guapo's No **** Rules for Child Rearin']
    I understand. In fact it is quite simple: It's my dime so its my rules. After you (mr. teanager) turn 18 and if you still feel the world (of which you are one of the wealthiest, safest and healthist top 2%) is giving you the shaft then dress like a vampire and punch holes in your manware, but do it on your own dime and far from here. Don't come back with a vampire wife and kid either.
    [/el Guapo's No **** Rules for Child Rearin']

    My operating theory is that if you don't put up with the trendy new age bull **** parenting methods early your kid won't get to the stage where a boy thinks black lipstick looks good on his lips and black paint on his fingernails. I see parents all the time where the kid(s) is in charge of the family simply because the parents lost the battle when the little **** was just a toddler. These kids need disipline and the parent of vampires are failures - cut and dried.

  19. #19
    Cyburbian Plus
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    Again I agree with E.G.
    growing up my mom said almost the same thing about smoking considering that dad had died of lung cancer.
    Last edited by JNA; 23 Aug 2004 at 2:01 PM.

  20. #20
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    Freaks are out all the time... But they become the majority at night. (sorry Freaks! )

  21. #21

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    I dress very, very square-or sloppy at worst. But, if you heard the music coming from my car stereo, you would expect me to do all that vampire junk. Nope. Just like wierd music.

    As for the question at hand-I live in the Greater Bay Area. Its freaks 24-7 here And, I would define as freeaky in their own way the bizarre Bible thumpers and how W is the Second Incarnation of the Lord who mutter darkly in letters to the editor about queers and socialists and their right to drive cannon-armed jeeps down Main Street (sorry, EG )

    And, the definition of "freak" is to me pretty subjective. Heck, who's freakier- the somewhat angst-ridden and silly Goth kid, or the self-confident, Proud to be Amuriken 350 pound bubba and his mulletted wife and future WCW "performer" in the parking lot at Wal Mart with a shopping cart full of Cheese Whiz and Ho-Hos. I know my answer to that question.

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by el Guapo
    These kids need disipline and the parent of vampires are failures - cut and dried.
    My kids are real lucky you are not their parent. And I take this as a borderline personal attack. When my kids were little, I tried to make them do x, y, or z and it didn't work. I had a choice: destroy my kids or figure out what DID work. I chose "b".

    My oldest son has multiple handicaps. He prefers clothing colors like yellow and orange because he is color blind and has other visual problems (I have spoken with other parents of color blind kids and those color preferences are common for such kids). He doesn't do it to be intentionally weird or "rebellious". He is a really sweet kid for whom "conventional" and "normal" do not work and all the parental "discipline" in the world will not change that fact because parental discipline will not cure him of being face blind, color blind, having visual processing problems, cystic fibrosis, extreme sensory issues and a host of other very real problems. And my husband's preference for black clothing is due in part to the fact that his pupils are twice normal size so he is very light sensitive and has amazing cat-like night sight but is readily blinded by bright lights. I had to stop wearing white from head to toe because on a sunny day he literally could not look at me if I was dressed in white. It blinded him.

    My husband is a "tough disciplinarian" but he never earned the respect of his kids and his arbitrary pronouncements tend to merely generate resentment. I am a tough disciplinarian in certain respects and my kids respect it when I demand something of them because I have earned their respect and because they know I do not do it merely because I am controlling and dictatorial. My husband will be lucky if the kids speak to him after they are adults.

    You can make pronouncements all day long about how your way is the only right way and it won't make me understand it any better. It will merely offend me and convince me that you are closed-minded, judgmental, dictatorial and a few other things that I do not aspire to be and will not attempt to emulate.

  23. #23
    Cyburbian Duke Of Dystopia's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Zoning Goddess
    Well, I think it's mostly because the older boy is somewhat of a cross-dresser, and his mom doesn't want the younger boy to see that. We are, after all, in a somewhat regressive small southern town. Plus, the mom's ex-would totally freak. He's a firefighter and very anal, very traditional.
    Is he a cross dresser or is he just into the androgenous goth look. There is a big difference. I know lots of people that meet the scary freak type, but I have also met some very nice girl next door types that also end up deserving the label?
    I can't deliver UTOPIA, but I can create a HELL for you to LIVE in :)DoD:(

  24. #24
    Cyburbian el Guapo's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Michele Zone
    My kids are real lucky you are not their parent.
    Ouch, all that from the comment that I wouldn't tollerate the kids running the house. Did I hit too close to home? You made the comment about how you couldn't understand a parent holding a certain position. Well, without 15,000 words I explained how a parent could. (Now, that was a bit personal)

    Quote Originally posted by Michele Zone
    And I take this as a borderline personal attack. When my kids were little, I tried to make them do x, y, or z and it didn't work. I had a choice: destroy my kids or figure out what DID work. I chose "b".
    Michele, It was not a personal attack. It was an observation that seemed fairly broad in its appicability to me. But if the shoe fits it isn't my fault. If your kid looks like this at family functions you might consider reevaluating your parenting style.



    Quote Originally posted by Michele Zone
    My oldest son has multiple handicaps. He prefers clothing colors like yellow and orange because he is color blind and has other visual problems (I have spoken with other parents of color blind kids and those color preferences are common for such kids). He doesn't do it to be intentionally weird or "rebellious". He is a really sweet kid for whom "conventional" and "normal" do not work and all the parental "discipline" in the world will not change that fact because parental discipline will not cure him of being face blind, color blind, having visual processing problems, cystic fibrosis, extreme sensory issues and a host of other very real problems. And my husband's preference for black clothing is due in part to the fact that his pupils are twice normal size so he is very light sensitive and has amazing cat-like night sight but is readily blinded by bright lights. I had to stop wearing white from head to toe because on a sunny day he literally could not look at me if I was dressed in white. It blinded him.
    Nowhere did I equate vampires to the handicapped. That is such a red herring. Boo to your stooping to the "he picked on the handicapped" argument. Shame. Dark cloths and goth are two different things. If your husband was cranking Concrete Blond and droping by the Red Cross for withdrawls that is different than the Johnny Cash, man in balck look.

    Quote Originally posted by Michele Zone
    My husband is a "tough disciplinarian" but he never earned the respect of his kids and his arbitrary pronouncements tend to merely generate resentment. I am a tough disciplinarian in certain respects and my kids respect it when I demand something of them because I have earned their respect and because they know I do not do it merely because I am controlling and dictatorial. My husband will be lucky if the kids speak to him after they are adults.
    One can't be both tough and arbitrary and I don't recall saying that was a good idea. Thus you make my point again. My parenting style is called "consistant" There are consequences, both good and bad for everything and my kid knows it. My kid also knows I'd do anything to back him up if he is in the right and I'd let him hang if he was guilty of a capitol crime. Thus, he is prepared to enter the world a responsible citizen. And not a coddled punk like so many of his peers.

    Quote Originally posted by Michele Zone
    You can make pronouncements all day long about how your way is the only right way and it won't make me understand it any better. It will merely offend me and convince me that you are closed-minded, judgmental, dictatorial and a few other things that I do not aspire to be and will not attempt to emulate.
    Hey Mods where is her yellow card?

    Sorry MZ but your'e wrong. If the product of any marriage is a flock of vampires, the parents did something wrong. And I'm damn comfortable with being a judgemental asshole. The world is a better place because some people occasionally stand up to what is popular and say "that's bull****"

    Now, seeing as you got to get a little personal, allow me: Kathy Lee it is time to quit trottin out Cody before every commercial break. And give poor Frank a break also.

    PS Wasn't it ZG's good friend's kid we were talking about?

  25. #25
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    eG I am about to leave for a few hours and cannot reply for 15,000 words worth at the moment. Given that I described my husband's attire as having a somewhat vampiric effect and ...for a few other reasons ... it did seem to me that you were implying that I am a failure as a parent, etc. I get accused of "letting the kids run the house" and I get tired of hearing it. It is an erroneous assumption on the part of a lot of people.

    Anyway, I have to go. Will hash this out later.

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