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Thread: Personal ad-ese to English, anyone?

  1. #1
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Personal ad-ese to English, anyone?

    In "women seeking men" ads on match.com, I encounter a couple of phrases over and over and over again.

    1) "I love life."
    2) "I know what I want", and a popular variant, "I want a man who knows what he wants."

    What the hell do these mean?
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  2. #2
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
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    Run from the prententious women and thier ads. Nothin' but trouble.

    If she wants a man who knows what he wants, she obviously doesn;t know what SHE wants and would like things decided for her.

    If she knows what she wants, then she has a standard that everyone has meet... and not many do.

    just to get a fire started..... <running away>
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  3. #3
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    In "women seeking men" ads on match.com, I encounter a couple of phrases over and over and over again.

    1) "I love life."
    2) "I know what I want", and a popular variant, "I want a man who knows what he wants."

    What the hell do these mean?
    1) "I love life." = I am an optimist when I am not in a bad mood. I want a man who will spend money to take me out places that I canít afford on my own.

    2) "I know what I want", and a popular variant, "I want a man who knows what he wants." = I want a guy who is not hung up on his ex and will focus all his attention onto me. I donít like compassion, and I donít want to have to work to get a guy to like me.

    3) Body Average = I am twenty or more pounds over weight.
    If you want different results in your life, you need to do different things than you have done in the past. Change is that simple.

  4. #4
          Downtown's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    1) "I love life."
    She thinks she's vivacious and does NOT enjoy sitting home, watching the baseball game on tv. she expects you to take her out.

    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    2) "I know what I want",
    I agree with Zman - she has a very specific ideal in her mind about how she wants to live her life, what she wants a man to be like. If you like bossy women, this is probably the one for you.

    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    "I want a man who knows what he wants."
    I disagree with Zman. I think this is a woman who is sick of being told "i'm not ready to commit", even though that may very well mean "i'm not ready to commit TO YOU".
    that - or Slackers need not apply - she wants a man with ambition.

    JMO

  5. #5
    Cyburbian PlannerByDay's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    2) "I know what I want", and a popular variant, "I want a man who knows what he wants." = I want a guy who is not hung up on his ex and will focus all his attention onto me. I donít like compassion, and I donít want to have to work to get a guy to like me.
    I would like to add " I don't want to compromise. If I can't have it my way I don't want it."

  6. #6
          Downtown's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    3) Body Average = I am twenty or more pounds over weight.
    Technically though, this is the average body.

  7. #7
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    In "women seeking men" ads on match.com, I encounter a couple of phrases over and over and over again.

    1) "I love life."
    2) "I know what I want", and a popular variant, "I want a man who knows what he wants."

    What the hell do these mean?
    These are 'filler' statements. They probably convey little more than the ad placer is: 1) unimaginative. 2) perhaps willfull (perhaps not, though).

    Like every other human endeavor there are only a handful of folks who create new forms. Everyone else, to varying degrees, imitates these forms. I have no doubt that 20 years ago a witty intelligent woman came up with "SWF 29 is searching for her knight in shining armor........likes long walks on moonlit beaches.....jerks need not apply" and was both witty and original. Unfortunately, the ones who are truly original are few and far between. Besides, are you really looking for a woman who is literate, intelligent AND original? They're pretty high maintenance, ya know
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, ďWhere are you from?Ē doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  8. #8
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    In "women seeking men" ads on match.com, I encounter a couple of phrases over and over and over again.

    1) "I love life."
    2) "I know what I want", and a popular variant, "I want a man who knows what he wants."

    What the hell do these mean?
    Hey Dan, you forgot some of the words in the quotes:

    "I love life with Bear."

    "I know what I want and it is Bear."

    "I want a man like Bear who knows what he wants. In fact, gimme Bear."

    Ya see, being married four (4) times gives me the ability to "see" past the original quoting.



    Bear

  9. #9
          abrowne's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister
    These are 'filler' statements. They probably convey little more than the ad placer is: 1) unimaginative. 2) perhaps willfull (perhaps not, though).

    Like every other human endeavor there are only a handful of folks who create new forms. Everyone else, to varying degrees, imitates these forms.
    I agree with this judgement. It seems they are just filling up to their expectations of what a personals ad is 'supposed' to be like. She probably has no idea what those statements mean, either.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally posted by abrowne
    I agree with this judgement. It seems they are just filling up to their expectations of what a personals ad is 'supposed' to be like. She probably has no idea what those statements mean, either.
    Isn't it pretty stupid to write something that either a) has no currency or b) tends to confuse and off-put people that otherwise might be suitable?
    Labor is prior to, and independent of, capital. Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if labor had not first existed. Labor is the superior of capital, and deserves much the higher consideration.
    Abraham Lincoln

  11. #11
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    One of my recent favorites:

    "I'm not looking for a leader. I'm not looking for a follower. I'm looking for someone to be by my side."

    BLECH!

    (Makes my signature line seem much more appropriate)

  12. #12
          abrowne's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Gedunker
    Isn't it pretty stupid to write something that either a) has no currency or b) tends to confuse and off-put people that otherwise might be suitable?
    I never said it was a good idea. Only that it seems to occur.

    It seems that people probably do it because they are so insecure and lost that they really have no self left... no psyche, just marketed solutions.

  13. #13
    Cyburbian Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    She's an airhead.

  14. #14
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    I can usually skip past those types of phrases if there is something substantial in the ad, but what I really don't like to read is "my devotion to God" or "my relationship with Jesus." Goodbye.

    After numerous failures, I have given up on Match and Yahoo's personals. I finally gave eHarmony a try and it is much, much better. I have even met a woman I have been seeing for a month and like very much.
    Anyone want to adopt a dog?

  15. #15
    Cyburbian AubieTurtle's avatar
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    "I love to smile"

    What the hell is that? Who doesn't love to smile? Other than people with Austin Powers type teeth, most everyone likes to smile.

    How about "I like breathing air" or "happiness makes me happy".

    Of course, I did write a personal ad one time in which I listed "a pulse" as a requirement, but I was being funny.

  16. #16
    Cyburbian donk's avatar
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    The phrase I've frequently seen is "I am ambitious". What they really mean is that they are gold digging, money grubbing expletives.
    Too lazy to beat myself up for being to lazy to beat myself up for being too lazy to... well you get the point....

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