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Thread: Life Classes

  1. #1
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Life Classes

    This past weekend I listened to many self help/ motivational books on tape and I realized that we learn to do what we do for a job in classes, but we do not learn the basics of how to live life. Very few take personal finance classes or we hear teachers say things like you will always be in debt, we donít take classes on how to pick a spouse and more than half marriages end in divorce, many donít take stress relief class, self heath classes, or self improvement and motivation classes.

    Do you know of any places that have groups to discuss these types of issues or concerns.

  2. #2
    Cyburbian H's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    we don’t take classes on how to pick a spouse and more than half marriages end in divorce, many don’t take stress relief class, self heath classes, or self improvement and motivation classes.
    I am a firm believer that this stuff cannot be taught, and never even really learned. You just gotta go with the flow… when one flow stops, catch a new flow… there is always a current going somewhere.

    (wow, that sounds really cheesy, I know, but it is really how I feel about life. Huh, I am a planner that doesn’t plan my personal life… what about that )

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Wannaplan?'s avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    Do you know of any places that have groups to discuss these types of issues or concerns.
    A singles fellowship every Thursday night at the local First Assembly of God church?

  4. #4
    NIMBY asshatterer Plus Richmond Jake's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Wanigas?
    A singles fellowship every Thursday night at the local First Assembly of God church?
    Hold on mods before you delete this. I need to get a screen print in its context.
    RJ is the KING of . The One

  5. #5
    Cyburbian silentvoice's avatar
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    Yeah I wish there are such classes, but then I'll be asleep in them anyway =P

  6. #6
    Cyburbian JNL's avatar
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    I have to agree with H.. you've just got to live it! You shouldn't think about it too much. For example, would taking a class on how to "pick" a spouse help? You still have to meet someone and see if there is a connection there, and if she wants to be your spouse!

  7. #7
    Cyburbian AubieTurtle's avatar
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    Actually my college offered a class called "Mate Selection". Friends who took it swore it wasn't a gimme class but they also admitted it was full of jocks.

    In high school I took a class called "Married Life and Childcare". I'm sure most of the small conservative southern town I lived in would have been shocked if they knew some of the videos we watched in there. The mother of one of my classmates had 'Catcher in the Rye' removed from the library without knowing her daughter was watching thermograms of people having sex, child birth videos, breast feeding videos, etc. in her fifth period class.

    But yeah, in general life doesn't come with an instruction manual.
    As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron. - H.L. Mencken

  8. #8
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNL
    I have to agree with H.. you've just got to live it! You shouldn't think about it too much. For example, would taking a class on how to "pick" a spouse help? You still have to meet someone and see if there is a connection there, and if she wants to be your spouse!
    I think it goes deeper than a match game. Most people do not realize things that they need to look at to see if their lives would be compatible. A class would give us insight on how to make a person choice, not to make the choice for us, or even give a group for options. There are other things that young adults deal with on a regular basis that I think that if we learned how not to mess it up, our lives could have a lot less issues.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    I think it goes deeper than a match game. Most people do not realize things that they need to look at to see if their lives would be compatible. A class would give us insight on how to make a person choice, not to make the choice for us, or even give a group for options. There are other things that young adults deal with on a regular basis that I think that if we learned how not to mess it up, our lives could have a lot less issues.
    Michaelskis don't take this as a personal slam, but.... A class for that? Get real. Who is an expert to teach a group of strangers on something so intimately personal. My mental image of this class is a group of weak minded souless and spineless people.

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Wannaplan?'s avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by RichmondJake
    Hold on mods before you delete this. I need to get a screen print in its context.
    I sense this is humor, but I must be too sleepy this morning or just dense to get it. What's wrong with an Evangelical singles gathering?

  11. #11
    Cyburbian Seabishop's avatar
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    While I think personal finance should be stressed more to high school kids (God knows I could have used it) aren't parents and families the ones who should be teaching people most of this stuff? I too cynical to trust organizations with their own agendas on teaching people how to live.

    Michael, you must be Michigan's most motivated man by now.

  12. #12
    Cyburbian boilerplater's avatar
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    Some have found the series of courses offered by Landmark Education to be useful. See http://www.landmarkeducation.com/
    I took some w/e courses with them, but became disillusioned when I saw how much of each course is a marketing spiel for the next one you should take. They can easily take over your life. There also seemed to be some prejudice against people of certain backgrounds.

    I think a lot of the self-help authors are full of it. For example, remember the "Rules Girls" book of a few years ago? It purported to inform women how to get a guy to marry them, since they used the methods to get married. Two women's experience isn't exactly a statistical mean, but it was enough for them. I read that both of the authors are divorced now.
    Adrift in a sea of beige

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    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Do you have a Learning Annex or some other alternative adult education organization where you live? Such organizations offer courses like what you're describing, but they are usually secular in nature. I have the feeling you're not looking for that, but rather something that is more spiritually rooted.

    Quote Originally posted by Wanigas?
    I sense this is humor, but I must be too sleepy this morning or just dense to get it. What's wrong with an Evangelical singles gathering?
    Nothing. Nothing at all.

    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  14. #14
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Chet
    Michaelskis don't take this as a personal slam, but.... A class for that? Get real. Who is an expert to teach a group of strangers on something so intimately personal. My mental image of this class is a group of weak minded souless and spineless people.
    No offence taken, and to answer your question, anyone who does marriage counseling would be a good start. Also psychiatrists, therapists, trained priests, and many other people. As for the character of individuals who would attend. Many people who do not have problems go though counseling to prevent the problems. By being proactive as opposed to reactive we do not need to be in crisis mode to deal with situations.


    Quote Originally posted by Seabishop
    While I think personal finance should be stressed more to high school kids (God knows I could have used it) aren't parents and families the ones who should be teaching people most of this stuff? I too cynical to trust organizations with their own agendas on teaching people how to live.

    Michael, you must be Michigan's most motivated man by now.
    I donít think it is so much as you need to do this or that, but more so here are some ways of doing things, or look for someone whoís goals, habits, and ideas donít conflict too much with your own. We as planners have been told several times by several professors that Big Boxes are bad, yet Wal-Mart still builds 100ís of new stores every year. Each university professor has his or her own agenda on how they want you to live your professional life. Why not get guidance on your personal life?

    As for the motivated thingÖ thank you, but I am just trying to live my life beyond the fullest extent that I can imagine.

    I also plan to take the same Dave Ramsey classes that Planner By Day is taking next fall.
    Last edited by michaelskis; 01 Dec 2004 at 10:31 AM.

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    Cyburbian Planderella's avatar
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    Even school doesn't teach you everything you need to know about doing your job. Living is about trial and error....baptism by the fire. You can't rely on a bunch of so-called experts (what exactly makes them an "expert" anyway?) tell you how to live or whatever. You'll never learn on your own. You'll never be able to make your own decisions. What kind of existence is that?
    "A witty woman is a treasure, a witty beauty is a power!"

  16. #16
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by boilerplater
    Some have found the series of courses offered by Landmark Education to be useful....
    And many people have accused this organization of operating very similarly to a cult. In fact, it has been associated with lawsuits by federal and other government agencies over some of its techniques. In some cases, employees have sued after being forced to attend by superiors. One of their ways of "proving" how successful their teaching has been is to strongly pressure attendees to get others to register. Managers have fallen victem to this by bringing it into the workplace. As a result, many employers, including governments, do not permit the use of training funds for this program.
    Anyone want to adopt a dog?

  17. #17
    Cyburbian Mud Princess's avatar
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    Well, I don't know about life classes or relationship classes, but I feel strongly that personal finance should be taught in school. One's parents are not always good role models... look at all the personal bankruptcy filings and high credit card balances people have!

    At the private high school I attended, I did take a personal finance course. We even had a textbook for it (now unfortunately very out of date ). My teacher wrote in my yearbook that she used to score my test first, to make sure her scoring sheet was right... I learned a lot from my grandmother too -- her skills served her well during the Great Depression.

  18. #18
    Cyburbian donk's avatar
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    Considering how good of student I am (a solid B-) I think taking some life classes would be even more depressing than my life. Failing tests just does nothing for my ego.

    After "The Power Within" I had a bit of invigoration, but it soon waned. Plus "those" type of people for the most part annoy me.
    Too lazy to beat myself up for being to lazy to beat myself up for being too lazy to... well you get the point....

  19. #19
    Cyburbian boiker's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Planderella
    Even school doesn't teach you everything you need to know about doing your job. Living is about trial and error....baptism by the fire. You can't rely on a bunch of so-called experts (what exactly makes them an "expert" anyway?) tell you how to live or whatever. You'll never learn on your own. You'll never be able to make your own decisions. What kind of existence is that?
    Heh! Your post made me think of the Nickelodeon cartoon "Rugrats". and those kids parents always leaning on the child psychologist, Dr. Lipschitz for directions on how to raise their kids. They don't make instinctive decisions, they make taught decisions and often the decision backfire or don't work out the way they think they will.

    In life, you are your best teacher. You can't learn unless you make mistakes. You can't make mistakes unless you try. You can't try if you fail to take chances on your instinct.

    Some things you can't teach. There are no "laws" to life. It's different for everyone. There are laws to physics, there are mathmatecal laws. Those are things that can be recorded and taught because they don't change..they are facts and indisputable. 2+2=4 not 5, and it never will.

    Finance can be taught..that is a finite law. don't spend more than you can afford and know/understand your investment and borrowing options.

    Careers and mates can only be advised on. There are no rules to teach regarding finding the right career or mate.. only advice.

    I have made mistakes, the lesson is not to repeat them. Beer- good! More beer- gooder! Too much beer- bad!
    Dude, I'm cheesing so hard right now.

  20. #20
    Cyburbian boilerplater's avatar
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    And many people have accused this organization of operating very similarly to a cult. In fact, it has been associated with lawsuits by federal and other government agencies over some of its techniques. In some cases, employees have sued after being forced to attend by superiors. One of their ways of "proving" how successful their teaching has been is to strongly pressure attendees to get others to register.
    Yeah, wow. Glad I got out of it. They do place a lot of emphasis on getting you more and more into it, spending more time with them and less with your friends and family. They were calling me for months trying to get me to take another course. I also found out it used to be called EST, and was started by a guy named Werner Ehrhard, who was a used car salesman before he came up with the principles for EST.
    Adrift in a sea of beige

  21. #21
    Cyburbian JNL's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Cardinal
    And many people have accused this organization of operating very similarly to a cult. In fact, it has been associated with lawsuits by federal and other government agencies over some of its techniques.
    Just yesterday a workmate was telling me how great the course is...

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    No offence taken, and to answer your question, anyone who does marriage counseling would be a good start. Also psychiatrists, therapists, trained priests, and many other people. As for the character of individuals who would attend. Many people who do not have problems go though counseling to prevent the problems. By being proactive as opposed to reactive we do not need to be in crisis mode to deal with situations.
    OK, now I see your angle. I was mis-interpreting something
    (before my 2nd cup of coffee)

  23. #23
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    No offence taken, and to answer your question, anyone who does marriage counseling would be a good start. Also psychiatrists, therapists, trained priests, and many other people. As for the character of individuals who would attend. Many people who do not have problems go though counseling to prevent the problems. By being proactive as opposed to reactive we do not need to be in crisis mode to deal with situations.
    You know, I really don't want to burst your bubble or anything, but most folks that I know who have pursued psychology degrees did so because they find people inherently mysterious. It is a little like a quote by the wife of some sex researcher: "I never see my husband since he became so interested in sex". Most of these people like to talk about relationships but many of them are really not very good at actually relating to people -- i.e. having a real relationship -- and I find most of them to be very poor role models and "teachers".

  24. #24
    Cyburbian Rumpy Tunanator's avatar
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    You need help....



    You can't learn from someone, you have to experience it for yourself, then you learn from that experience.

    But if your willing to shell out some cash, I can teach you all you want to know about life, michaelskis
    A guy once told me, "Do not have any attachments, do not have anything in your life you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you spot the heat around the corner."


    Neil McCauley (Robert DeNiro): Heat 1995

  25. #25
    Cyburbian Plus Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Planderella
    You can't rely on a bunch of so-called experts (what exactly makes them an "expert" anyway?) tell you how to live or whatever. You'll never learn on your own. You'll never be able to make your own decisions. What kind of existence is that?
    One of the really big reasons I don't go to church. I prefer to make my own decisions on how to live my life.

    Back more or less OT: I remember taking a class in middle school, loooong ago, about how to balance a checkbook, but that was about it for "real life" when I was in school.

    My employer does offer a LOT of free employee classes on finance, retirement, kids & money, stress management, assertiveness, etc., and I've found some of these to be helpful (and some not).

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