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Thread: You know you're from __________ when.....

  1. #1
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
    Apr 2004
    Tri-Cities, Washington
    Blog entries

    You know you're from __________ when.....

    This has probably been done here before, but I am bored this "Friday Afternoon" and stumbled upon one of these for my home state. What are the ones from yours?

    1. You switch from “Heat” to “A/C” in one day.
    2. You know what the “Peoples Republic of Boulder” means.
    3. Your sense of direction is: towards the mountains and away from the mountains.
    4. You’re a meat-eating vegetarian.
    5. The bike/skis on your car is worth more than your car.
    6. You use a down comforter in the summer because you have the a/c on at 55 degrees.
    7. You’re able to drive 65 miles per hour through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without even flinching.
    8. You take your out-of-town guests to Pike's Peak even though you would never go there otherwise.
    9. You install security lights on your house and garage but leave all the doors unlocked.
    10. You think the major food groups are granola bars, tofu and Fat Tire Beer.
    11. You carry jumper cables in the car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
    12. You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
    13. Driving is better in the winter ‘cause the pot holes are filled with snow.
    14. You know all 4 seasons “almost winter, winter, still winter and “construction”.
    15. You’ve been tear gassed in a riot to celebrate a team’s victory.
    16. You can never figure out why your out-of-town guests faint from altitude sickness on a picnic to the mountains.
    17. You can drive over a 12,000 foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but can’t get to work if there are 4 inches of snow.
    18. You know the ‘correct’ pronunciation of Buena Vista.
    19. When you visit friends at sea level, you can drink a case of beer and not get a buzz.
    20. Your car insurance costs more than your car.
    21. You have surge protectors on every outlet.
    22. April showers bring May blizzards.
    23. You see someone riding a Harley in a downpour, and you look closer to see if it’s anyone you know.
    24. ‘Timberline’ is someplace you have actually been. Many times.
    25. You know what a ‘Chinook’ is.
    26. You know what a ‘Rocky Mountain oyster’ is.
    27. You know what a ‘fourteener’ is.
    28. But you don’t know what a ‘turn signal’ is.
    29. A bear on your front porch doesn’t bother you nearly as much as seeing a California License Plate.
    30. Your golf bag has a 9-iron, a 3-wood and a lightning-rod.
    31. You know who Alfred Packer was.
    32. SPF 90 is not out of the question.
    33. People from other states breathe 5 times as often as you do.
    34. Having a Senator named Nighthorse doesn’t seem strange.
    35. Thunder has set off your car alarm! .
    36. You have an $800 stereo in a $300 truck.
    37. A sudden loss of cabin pressure is not a big deal.
    38. You think a red light means 3 more cars can go.
    39. “Where we’re going, we don’t need roads!!”
    40. You know where Doc Holliday’s grave is.
    41. You know where Buffalo Bill’s grave is.
    42. You know where the real ‘South Park’ is.
    43. You can recognize the license plates of all 50 states on sight.
    44. Driving directions usually include ‘Go over_____ Pass…’
    45. You’ve ever dressed in shorts, sandals, and a parka.
    46. You’ve gone skiing in July.
    47. You’ve gone sunbathing in January.
    48. You get a certain feeling of satisfaction from knowing that California and Texas are both downstream.

    Sorry about that last one.....
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone

  2. #2
    Cyburbian Hceux's avatar
    Oct 2003
    In Wasteland of Cedar Trees
    Quote Originally posted by zmanPLAN
    25. You know what a ‘Chinook’ is.
    I hadn't realized that the term of Chinook is also used in the States. I thought it was just used to describe a certain phenonmenon that happens in and about Calgary, Alberta.

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
    May 2003
    Northwestern Ohio
    Quote Originally posted by zmanPLAN
    This has probably been done here before, but I am bored this "Friday Afternoon" and stumbled upon one of these for my home state. What are the ones from yours?

    27. You know what a ‘fourteener’ is.
    OK, recalling a certain scene in "Animal House", this Bear now has two (2) little angels, one (1) on each shoulder.

    The angel on the right is saying, "Fourteener, huh?! That would be mountains over 14,000 feet."

    The angel on the left is saying something very different.


  4. #4
    Corn Burning Fool giff57's avatar
    Jul 1998
    On the Mother River
    You know you're from Iowa When

    You've never met any celebrities

    Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway

    "Vacation" means driving through the Amanas or going to Adventureland

    You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular

    You measure distance in minutes

    Down south to you means Missouri

    You know several people who have hit a deer

    You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Des Moines"

    You know the answer to the question "Is this Heaven?"

    Your school classes were canceled because of cold

    Your school classes were canceled because of heat

    You know where all the Yoders live

    You know what "Hawks" and "Clones" are

    You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way

    You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day

    You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better"

    You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July

    Stores don't have bags, they have sacks

    You see people wear bib overalls at funerals

    You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no matter what time of the year

    You end your sentences with an unnecessary exposition. Example: "Where's my coat at?"

    All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit or vegetable

    You can locate Iowa on the United States map

    Detassling was your first job

    You've been on a "Geode Hunt"

    Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big as the bun and accompanied! d only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice

    You learn your pickup will run without a muffler

    You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked

    When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say "It was different"

    Being a bit younger, you remember Terry Branstad as the governor the whole time you were growing up

    You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor

    People from other states love to hear you say "Iowa" and other words with "Os" in them

    You carry jumper cables in your car

    You drink "pop"

    You know what the numbers I-80, 280 and 380 mean

    You know what "cow chips" are

    You actually understand these statements and pass them on to all your Iowa friends!
    “As soon as public service ceases to be the chief business of the citizens, and they would rather serve with their money than with their persons, the State is not far from its fall”
    Jean-Jacques Rousseau

  5. #5
    Cyburbian jsk1983's avatar
    Feb 2004
    Chicago, IL
    I'm not actually from Binghamton, but here's the list.

    You know your from Binghamton if...

    ....you've been to the beer joint of your dreams.

    ....bulls are on restaurant roofs.

    ....Cortezes is like Number 5 but with hookers outside.

    ....Boscov's and Wal-Mart are quality shopping.

    ....Olive Garden and Red Lobster are quality restaurants.

    ....Wegmans is larger than 500,000 square feet.

    ....you're only 60 miles from beautiful Scranton!

    ....you can get anywhere in 15 minutes or less (including the airport).

    ....you've had to take your laptop out of your bag at the airport scanner.

    ....every time you meet someone who's moved to Binghamton from out of
    town, you ask, "Why on earth did you ever move to THIS godforsaken place?"

    ....you think of its proximity to New York City as one of the best things
    about living in Binghamton.

    ....you think of its proximity to New York City as one of the worst things
    about living in Binghamton.

    ....you ever shopped for clothing and shoes in Pennsylvania to avoid sales
    tax before Broome County finally removed it.

    ....you are related to someone who works at IBM.

    ....you are related to someone who used to work at "EJ."

    ....you have always known what "E-J" stands for.

    ....you used to feel guilty if you bought anything other than "E-J" shoes,
    and even today, you wonder if you were ultimately responsible for their

    ....you argue with your friends about which bar serves the best spiedies.

    ....cubed, marinated spiedie meat is for sale in every local supermarket at
    outrageous prices.

    ....you know someone who lives in Endicott in an "IBM house" with a
    bomb shelter built into the basement in case they dropped The BigOne (which
    is now used as a soundproof den).

    ....you remember when the B.C. Icemen were the Binghamton Rangers (& the

    ....you remember when Juanita Crabb was mayor, and can express your
    opinions about her term at the drop of a hat, in explicit detail.

    ....you are always complaining about the hopeless conservatism of the local
    government and how they will never do anything real to bring back downtown.

    ....your idea of the ultimate date is dinner at Number 5. ....you know the
    tune to "See you at the Giant."

    ....you know what the "Little Giant" is, and that it's not an oxymoron.

    ....you wonder if Oakdale Mall will ever make up the ground it lost to Town
    Square Mall.

    ....the only really good bookstore in town is the Barnes & Noble in Vestal.

    ....you remember all the stores that *used* to be in Vestal Plaza before it
    became Vestal Park.

    ....the commercials for Beacon Water Treatment Systems and "The Can Man"
    make you laugh.

    ....you think that people who don't know how to drive in the Johnson City
    traffic circle are either wimps or idiots.

    ....of course, you *never* call it "Johnson City"; it's always "JC."

    ....you think "C. Fred" is a perfectly normal name for a middle school, and
    "Harry L" is a perfectly normal name for a highway.

    ....you still call Binghamton University "SUNY."

    ....you live in Vestal and you are terrified of "SUNY" buying any more
    property because then it will go off the tax rolls.

    ....it's considered normal for 15 college students to pile in one cab to go
    out on a weekend.

    ....it's considered normal for 15 college students to live in one house,
    but that doesn't mean the people on Leroy Street like it.

    ....you have a button certifying that you have ridden all six local

    ....you think there is no point to getting any kind of ice cream other than
    Pat Mitchell's.

    ....your idea of "upward mobility" is when someone moves to Syracuse.

    ....you go to Ithaca on the weekends for fun.

    ....you grew up thinking every park had a carousel.

    ....you've always wondered what it means to be "The Parlor City."

    ....you think eating spiedies and watching hot-air balloons launch is the
    highlight of the summer.

    ....you knew that North Field is behind East Middle School.

    ....you expect fireworks after every other minor league baseball game.

    ....people from 15 miles away think you live in a big city.

  6. #6
    Cyburbian MitchBaby's avatar
    Jan 2005
    Vancouver, BC, Canada

    You know you are from Vancouver, British Columbia When______________

    You know you are from Vancouver, British Columbia

    1) You know what these acronyms mean: PNE, VPL, VAG, YVR.

    2) You know the names and locations of at least three beaches, and could give a speech on the cultural difference between Wreck and Kitsilano Beach.

    3) You know what a binner is.

    4) If you hear that someone is doing the Grind, you know they’re not at work.

    5) You've had California roll for lunch.

    6) You can tell the difference between fresh, previously frozen, and farmed salmon, and you have a philosophy about them.

    7) You don't even listen when the forecast announces "chance of showers."

    8) If there's a day of snowfall, however, you consider not going to work.

    9) You know that West Vancouver, the West End, and the Westside are three different places.

    10) You know what an orca looks like.

    11) The phrase "someone's shooting in the alley" doesn't make you think of guns.

    12) You can't imagine what a front yard would look like without green grass and green leaves.

    13) You had a barbecue at the beach.

    14) You've strolled along the Drive.

    15) You can always tell where north is.

  7. #7
    moderator in moderation Suburb Repairman's avatar
    Jun 2003
    at the neighboring pub
    Here's one for Houston, though it focuses on the Houston Rules of the Road. Salmissra may be the only one that can really appreciate this.

    Houston Rules of the Road

    1. You must learn to pronounce the city name. It is "Ewe-stun", not "Huestun." Oh yea, it is pronounced "San Phal-ee-pay," not "San Phil-eep"
    (San Felipe).

    2. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Houston has its own version of traffic rules.... Hold on and pray. There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in Houston. We all drive like that.

    3. All directions start with, "Go down to Loop 610".... which has no beginning and no end.

    4. The Chamber of Commerce calls getting through traffic.... a "Scenic Drive."

    5. The morning rush hour is from 6:00AM to 10:00AM. The evening rush hour is from 3:00PM to 7:00PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.

    6. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear-ended, cussed out and possibly shot. When you are the first one off the starting line, count to five when the light turns green before going, to avoid getting into any cross-traffic's way.

    7. Kuykendahl Road can ONLY be pronounced by a native Houstonian.

    8. Construction on I-10, I-45, US 59 and Loop 610 is a way of life and a permanent form of entertainment.

    9. All unexplained smells are explained by the phrase, "Oh, we must be in Pasadena!!!."

    10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory defect.

    11. All old ladies with blue hair in a pink Cadillac have total right-of-way.

    12. The minimum acceptable speed on Loop 610 is 85 mph. Anything less is considered downright sissy.

    13. The wrought iron on windows in east Houston is NOT ornamental.

    14. Never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that says, "Keep honking, I'm reloading." In fact, don't honk at anyone.

    15. If you are in the left lane, and only going 70 mph in a 60 mph zone, people are not waving when they go by.

    16. The Sam Houston Toll road is our daily version of NASCAR.

    17. If it's 100 degrees, Thanksgiving must be next weekend.

    18. When in doubt, remember that all unmarked exits lead to Louisiana.

    19. You don't have to wait for an exit to get off a freeway, just follow the ruts in the grass to the feeder road like everyone else. This is how Houston residents notify Texas Department of Transportation where exits should have been built.

    The last one is my favorite.

    "Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."

    - Herman Göring at the Nuremburg trials (thoughts on democracy)

  8. #8
    Jan 2003
    Santiago, Chile
    You know you're from Chile when:
    1.- The only english you know are from fancy clothing brands and advertisments.
    2.- You're labeled as a thief in Europe
    3.- You don't feel at ease in Peru nor Bolivia
    4.- Instead of doing things right the first time, you try to do it in an obscure manner just to save time and/or money.
    5.- You live off the legendary fame of being friendly and hospitalitarian people.
    6.- You live in a 6 million inhabitant sprawling metropolis and think of it as the entire country.
    7.- You don't live in Santiago and just bitch and moan about centralism without doing anything about it.
    8.- You try to live as people in the US, just to look ridiculous trying.
    9.- Rich people are completely segregated from poor people. (Santiago mainly)
    10.- People just can't let go of things that happened over 30 years ago.
    11.- You're sucessfull, and everybody else will try to f*ck you up.
    Those are things that come to mind right now. Maybe I'll add more later.
    I hate #11 the most.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian donk's avatar
    Sep 2001
    skating on thin ice
    You know you are from NB when

    1) The phrase " am a man just needs to make a living" is an acceptable reason for raping and destroying beuaty and economic potential for the future. Why wait when you can have 10 cents today vs $500 tomorrow.

    2) You understand the concept of up river vs down river and know the point when travelling from Miramichi to Fredericton where you stop going up river and start going down river.

    3) You know the response to "How's she goin'?"

    4) You live in a house that was once a bootleggers.

    5) You know what pogie is and only really work for stamps.

    6) You drink Alpine.

    7) You buy bologna by the bag.

    8) Higher education is grade 9

    You know you are from a certain county in South westrn Ontario when

    1) You've had ecoli poisoning and can expect to get it again.

    2) Even though you live near some of teh best beef producers in teh world, you've never had prime rib, and if you have, you've broiled it dry.

    3) A traffic jam occurs due to combine traffic

    4) You can tell the difference between Mennonite sects in the area and where the person is from, even though they all have the same last name.

    5) You drink OV or 50.

    6) Higher education is grade 9.
    Too lazy to beat myself up for being to lazy to beat myself up for being too lazy to... well you get the point....

  10. #10
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
    Mar 1996
    Upstate New York
    Blog entries
    You may be from Amherst if --

    1) You ever boasted about having a Buffalo Sabre as a next door neighbor.

    2) You ever worked at Stereo Advantage, or any of their affiliated businesses ([insert name here] Advantage, Tony Walker, Aussie [insert name here], etc.).

    3) You ever protested a planned apartment complex that was to be built within a mile of your house - but don't mind more big box retail stores like Target and Home Depot.

    4) You ever bragged about how many years it has been since you last visited Downtown Buffalo.

    5) People get lost trying to find your house.

    6) You ever questioned the name "Eastern Hills Mall."

    7) You could care less about the Bills, but you have season tickets for the Sabres.

    8) You think Eggertsville is a slum.

    9) You rarely venture south of I-90, except to go to the ski resorts, the Walden Galleria and Sabres games.

    10) Half of your wardrobe consists of Tony Walker goods or Aussie T-shirts ("Give Blood - Play Hockey," "Pain is Temporary - Pride is Permanent," etc.)

    11) Your property tax bill is higher than your mortgage payment.

    12) You have more than ten cloth baseball caps, all of which have very tightly curled brims.

    13) You think a three foot slope is a major hill.

    14) Your house has a circular driveway, or a concrete pad perpendicular to your driveway to park yet another Acura.

    15) You ever totaled your Lexus by crashing into a deer.

    16) The name of your favorite restaurant ends in "Trattoria," "Bistro," "Ristorante," "Cucina," "New American Grill" or "Clay Oven."

    17) You holiday in Cape Cod, not Crystal Beach.

    18) The only bus you ever rode was yellow.

    19) Your neighborhood has more synagogues, mosques, Hindu temples and Protestant churches than Catholic churches.

    20) You really don't see what the big deal is about urban sprawl.

    21) You live on a street that --
    - is named after whatever animal or tree was killed off to build the subdivision
    - is named [insert name here] Del Way
    - is named [insert name here] Lea
    - has an outrageously British name ("Barringtonshire Court," "Wexfordham Lane," etc.)
    - has a name that does not end in the word "street" or "avenue"
    - is plowed daily, even when there's no snow
    - is lined with real working gaslights

    22) Your lot is measured in acres, not square feet.

    23) You think nothing of a new Wal-Mart opening up next to a vacant building that used to be a Kmart, or a new Home Depot next to an empty Chase-Pitkin store.

    24) You have a "service" mow your lawn in the summer and plow your driveway in the winter.

    25) You say you're from Williamsville, Eggertsville, Snyder, East Amherst, Getzville - but not Amherst itself.

    26) You have no discernable Buffalo accent whatsoever.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  11. #11
    Cyburbian mgk920's avatar
    Mar 2004
    Appleton, Wisconsin
    You know you're a Wisconsinite when:

    1) You see more NFL team banners than state flags on flagpoles;

    2) 'East-West' and 'North-South' have got to be the biggest cities in the world;

    3) People ask you where the nearest 'bubbler' is;

    4) The polka dance at the annual church festival is the local cultural highlight;

    5) The polka dance is the highlight of a wedding reception, too;

    6) Tex-Mex mariachi music doesn't sound all that different, either;

    5) The catch line on the Schlotzsky's logo "Funny name...". -- NOT funny here, it's NORMAL!

    6) Sturgeon spearing season is an annual cultural highlight;

    7) Madison -- a growing area surrounded by reality;

    8) Roadkill? Sausage!

    9) The fashion color of fall -- deer hunter orange;

    10) Where else can two life-long bachelors become USSenators?

    11) 'Business-casual' attire MUST include an NFL team logo on the shirt pocket;

    12) "Vote early - and often"

    13) Did I mention that the most popular colors in clothing, especially cold-weather outerwear, are dark shades of yellow and green?

    14) "Cheesehead" is not an insult, it is a word used with pride;

    15) The first thought when passing a sign announcing that one is entering an Indian Reservation is 'Where's the casino?';

    16) You know what a 'FIB' is and how to identify and avoid one;

    17) Wisconsin Dells vs Door County? Decisions, decisions....

    18) '4'

    19) You are the most embarrassed of all by your governor's choice in state quarter designs;

    20) You can pick the out-of-stater out of a group when they say 'Route...';

    21) You stay to the end of the game, no matter what the score (especially if the '5th quarter' is coming up);

    22) You mentally spell out words when you drive the state's county highways;

    23) Bratwurst, nature's most perfect food!

    24) Beer, nature's most perfect way to wash it down!

    25) NFL-licensed stuff, nature's most perfect gift!

    26) Yaaah, Hey Dere!

    27) You worship Wayne Larravee and heed every word he says;

    28) You can play sheepshead without being taken to the cleaners;

    29) You see noticably lighter street traffic for a few hours on most Sunday afternoons and the occassional Monday evening in fall/early winter;

    30) Musky-hunting is an art;

    31) George Webb. Who needs Waffle House?

    32) You know how to properly pronounce 'Shawano' and 'Berlin';

    33) You use the 'Adult Toy Store' as a highway landmark;

    34) You can do the 'Chicken Dance' in record time;

    35) You know who 'Les Paul' was;

    36) 'Season tickets' are the most cherished family heirloom of all;

    37) You know what the little red thingies on Highway 32 signs are;


    39) 'MAARS CHEESE CASTLE' doesn't seem odd;

    40) 'Bong Recreation Area' doesn't seem odd;

    41) Whitefish + potatoes + onions + about 0.25L of kerosene = culinary heaven;

    42) You cheer Matt Kennseth and mourned Alan Kulwicki;

    43) You base your travel plans on the whims of the NFL and NCAA Div-1A schedule makers.

    I could go on and on and on

    Last edited by mgk920; 12 Feb 2005 at 3:24 PM.

  12. #12
    Cyburbian biscuit's avatar
    Nov 2002
    Paris of Appalachia
    You know you're from South Carolina when...

    There ain't no such thing as "lunch." There's "dinner" and then there's "supper."

    Sweet tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you're two. "Backards and forwards" means, "I know everything about you."

    There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 of more, except for Orangeburg which has Dairy-O.

    Shagging with someone doesn’t mean having sex.

    You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.

    "Vacation" means going to Myrtle Beach.

    Out of state friends beg you to send them fireworks

    You’ve ended relationships over the outcome of the annual Clemson / Carolina football game.

    You find it odd that BBQ sauce would be made from anything other than mustard.

    You've taken a road trip to South of the Border - and it wasn't Mexico

    You know that North is south of Due West.

    You can tell if someone is from the Lowcountry, the Upstate, or the Midlands the moment they open their mouth.

    You buy your groceries at either Winn-Dixie or Bi-Lo.

    You know what Palmetto Pride is... and you have it.

  13. #13
          abrowne's avatar
    Jan 2005
    Quote Originally posted by zmanPLAN
    12. You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
    In Vancouver that would read: You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a raincoat.

    And that's not really a joke, actually.

  14. #14
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
    May 2003
    Northwestern Ohio

    You Know You're From Northwest Ohio When.....

    1. Half of your family wears (stoopid) Ohio State "buckeye bracelets" and the other half uses the phrase "Go Blue!" like a person from Hawaii uses "Aloha".
    2. You build in an extra half-hour on your route if you have to cross railroad tracks.....and there is a 120% chance you will.
    3. You know that Carty is an ex-Toledo mayor who has a TV show with the trump line, "It's just not right!".
    4. You kow that Carty could get elected again if he decided to run.
    5. You know that the "Battle Of I-75" is a football battle between two (2) Mid-Am Conference teams in NW Ohio.
    6. You have friends or relatives who know about Lagrinka and Koochvants (sic?).
    7. You drink a shot and a beer for breakfast.
    8. The older guys on your block who are retired worked for an auto parts manufacturer and retired with a pension bigger than your present wage.
    9. The son of that same guy has advanced to "District Manager" of a local fast food joint and is making $21,000 / year.
    10. You know what a Mud Hen is.
    11. You miss Rocky The Rocket (because of the obvious and fun phallic reference.)
    12. If you are young you call it Airport Highway and if you are older you call it Chicago Pike.
    13. If you follow high school sports you fully understand that all the Catholic schools get all the good athletes and win all the championships.
    14. You argue with friends about which Mexican restaurant makes the best margaritas.
    15. Your argument about margos always includes the statement "You know, the same family owns all the restaurants so the recipe is the same."
    16. Even if blind you can smell east Toledo and (the suburb of) Oregon.
    17. Your parents always voted full-ticket Democratic.
    18. You always go the speed limit in the rich (and surrounded by Toledo corporate limits) suburb of Ottawa Hills.
    19. You know that the speed limit on every street in Ottawa Hills is 25 mph.
    20. You remember John Denver's song, "Saturday Night In Toledo, Ohio" but you can't recall the words.
    21. You lock your car doors anyplace within two (2) miles of downtown Toledo.
    22. You know that the song "You Picked A Fine Time To Leave Me, Lucille" starts with the first verse referring to a bar in downtown Toledo.
    23. You watch weekly as about 35% of the trees in the area are removed because of ash borer disease.
    24. You know that the suburb of Sylvania means "city of trees".
    25. You understand that you can get from one (1) end of a metro area of 600,000 to the other end in just a few minutes, with very little traffic tie-ups.
    26. You think that the government skyscraper in downtown Toledo is a good looking building. (Bleah!)
    27. You know that Utopia Street isn't "utopian" at all.
    28. You consider Point Place a suburb, even though it is just a neighborhood.
    29. If you are older you can remember when just about every corner had a small store that sold kielbasa.
    30. You brag to your out of town friends that the Toledo Museum of Art is considered to be one (1) of the country's "Ten Best" but you haven't been there in years.


  15. #15
    Cyburbian JNL's avatar
    Jul 2002
    Wellington, NZ
    Nice timing - I just got emailed this this morning:

    You know you live in Wellington (or why you left!) when...

    1. You can wake up during an earthquake and think that it's just the wind that's shaking your house.
    2. You can say "Wellington is full of ferries" and not be considered homophobic.
    3. You can recognise half the city's population when walking down the street.
    4. You can afford a $1000 suit but still flat in a house that requires 3 sets of clothing and two dehumidifiers to stay warm.
    5. You see someone travelling 100kph on the motorway and you complain how fast people travel these days.
    6. You walk from the Railway Station to Willis Street without ever checking for traffic.
    7. "Just turn left at the first StarMart, walk down the street till you get to the third StarMart, turn right, go 3 StarMarts up and you're there"
    8. Seeing the Brooklyn Wind Turbine not turning is a newsworthy event.
    9. It takes you 20 minutes to drive around the block in peak traffic due to the 'one way system'.
    10. Boarding a Stagecoach bus is a hazardous activity.
    11. You take a bodyguard down Courtenay Place in case you bump into a drunk politician.
    12. The centre line is negotiable, especially on the Brooklyn & Hataitai hills where parked cars can take up 80% of the road
    13. You get altitude sickness going from your car to your front door.
    14. You have to leave the city to do your shopping.
    15. Any wind that doesn't threaten to take your roof off is just a 'bit of a breeze'
    16. You can detect 27 different shades of black suit.
    17. When an earthquake hits, instead of hiding under your desk, you hold a bet with your workmates on the force, focus and epicentre.
    18. When giving directions to tourists, you point up.
    19. You go out for your $5 coffee with friends and complain how expensive Auckland is.

  16. #16
    Cyburbian Queen B's avatar
    Mar 2003
    "Somewhere in the middle"
    This one came E mail yesterday
    Not exactly you know you are from KS when but it sure does explain the attitude!

    God Bless Kansas

    Rules to Enter Kansas:
    Applies to each person as they enter Kansas.
    Learn & remember:
    East Coast and California-types pay particular attention!

    1. Pull your droopy pants up.
    You look like an idiot.

    2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road."
    I drive a pickup truck because I want to.
    No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive
    it or get out of the way.

    3. They are cattle & feed lots.
    That's what they smell like to you.
    They smell like money to us.
    Get over it.
    Don't like it?
    I-70 goes east and west, I-35 goes north and south.
    Pick one.

    4. So you have a $60,000 car.
    We're impressed.
    We have $150,000 wheat combines that are driven only 3 weeks a year.

    5. So every person in every pickup waves.
    It's called being friendly.
    Try to understand the concept, you whiney elitest.

    6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of Ducks are coming in, we WILL
    shoot it out of your hand.
    You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.

    7. Yeah, we eat catfish & calf fries.
    You really want sushi & caviar?
    It's available at the corner bait shop.

    8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of pheasant season.
    It's a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.

    9. We open doors for women.
    That is applied to all women, regardless of age.

    10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu.
    Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of
    ham & turkey.

    11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats,
    vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and Picante
    Oh, yeah.... We don't care what you folks in Malibu call that stuff you
    eat... It AINT REAL CHILI!!
    Chili was born and bred in Abilene.... and real chili never met ground

    12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over
    ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be! cute, k now how to
    shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

    13. Butler County,K-State and High School Football is as important here as
    the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.

    14. Yeah, we have golf courses.
    But don't hit the water hazards - it spooks the fish.

    15. Colleges? Try Butler County JUCO,KU, K-State, Washburn, or abunch a'
    They come outa there with an education plus a love for God and country, and
    they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.

    16. Our state is home to "The Big Red One," so if you feel inclined to
    flip the bird to one of us in the vicinity of Junction City, you'll get your
    happy, flabby eastern/California butt whipped by the best!
    17. Always remember what our great native son, Gen. Eisenhower once said:
    It is all a matter of perspective!!!

  17. #17
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
    Apr 2004
    Tri-Cities, Washington
    Blog entries
    With Queen B and my list, California isn't too popular....
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone

  18. #18
    Cyburbian Floridays's avatar
    Jul 2002
    South FL
    You Know You're From Oklahoma If...

    •"Howdy" seems to be a normal way of greeting another adult, with no irony intended.
    •A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
    •You have used the phrase "fixin' to" during the last 12 months.
    •Someone you know has used an OU football schedule to plan their wedding date (it really happens!).
    •You've ever been excused from school because "the cows got out."
    •You can properly pronounce Eufaula, Gotebo, Okemah and Chickasha.
    •You can remember the name of the last state legislator to introduce a bill involving castration, and he didn't mean farm animals.
    •You know exactly what calf fries are, and eat them anyway. And it doesn't seem odd to see the term "chicken fried chicken" on a menu.
    •You think that people who complain about the wind in other states are sissies.
    •It doesn't bother you to use an airport named for a man who died in an airplane crash.
    •You have owned at least one belt buckle bigger than your fist.
    •A bad traffic jam involves two cars staring each other down at a four-way stop, each determined to be the most polite and let the other go first.
    •You know in which state "Miam-uh" is and in which state "Miam-ee" is.
    •Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.
    •You save all your life for your dream vacation, and use it to go to the OU/Texas game.
    •It doesn't seem peculiar if your spouse says "I'm going in to town for something" even though you live in town.
    •When someone refers to the current season, you have no idea if they mean spring, summer, fall, winter or football.

  19. #19
    Suspended Bad Email Address teshadoh's avatar
    Mar 2004
    Boulder, CO
    I'll add to Biscuits list:

    You know you're from SC when;

    When half the dishes at dinner included mayonaise as an ingredient.

    When 3 grown men meet - they likely include the following: someone who works for the state in Columbia, an engineer from Greenville, & someone who owns an antique shop in Charleston.

    Your favorite restaraunt typically includes a school cafeteria dining table.

    Shrimp is only eaten two ways: fried with tater tots with tarter sauce (another mayo dish) or boiled with grits.

    Coleslaw (another mayo dish) is a primary fixture for hot dogs, bbq, or burgers.

  20. #20
    Cyburbian Seabishop's avatar
    Nov 2002
    I'll give it a shot, even though no one will really know what I'm talking about.

    You know you're from Rhode Island when . . .

    You wonder why beaches down south have all those ugly high rises.

    You hope you get that new job out in North Kingston but you're worried about the effect that 15 mile commute will have on your family life.

    You talk funny but are satisfied that people in Boston and NYC talk even funnier.

    You think Jesus was Italian.

    You have heard someone say "there was less crime in this neighborhood back when the mob was in control"

    You are jealous of Delaware's massive size.

    When watching the local news you can guess which towns various crimes occur in before the anchorman tells you: Providence - murders, Johnston - gambling/other white collar mafia crime, Woonsocket - child abuse, Central Falls - drugs, South Kingstown - drunk driving.

    You consider Connecticut part of the "Midwest" where people talk like on TV.

    You've heard the sentence "We don't want this to become another Route 2" several times at public meetings.

    You can get anywhere downtown but you can't explain how to get there.

    You would live in or near Boston if you could only afford it.

  21. #21
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
    Oct 2001
    Middle of a Dusty Street
    You know you're an Oregonian if you:

    # Feel guilty throwing an aluminum can in the trash.
    # Use the word "sunbreaks" and know what it means.
    # Know more than 10 words to describe a cup of coffee.
    # Obey all traffic laws except "keep right unless passing."
    # Never go camping without waterproof matches and ponchos.
    # Feel overdressed wearing a suit to a nice restaurant.
    # Hear the word "ferry" and think of boats and long waits.
    # Know more people who own boats than own air conditioners.
    # Stand on a deserted street corner in the rain waiting for the light to change.
    # Know at least eight people who work for Intel or Nike, or used to work for Tektronix.
    # Are amazed by an accurate weather forecast.
    # Consider if it doesn't have snow on it or has not recently erupted, regardless of altitude, it is a "hill" not a "mountain".
    # Only honk your car horn if a collision is imminent; never for anything else.
    # Go to a really nice bar and sit at a table.
    # Think skiing always means being covered from head to toe, in snow or water.
    # In winter, go to work in the dark and go home in the dark, but only have an eight hour work day.
    # Can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best and Veneto's.
    # Know the difference between Chinook, Coho, and Sockeye salmon.
    # Know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Issaquah, Oregon and Willamette.
    # Consider swimming an indoor sport.
    # Are not fazed by: "Today's forecast: showers followed by rain," and "Tomorrow's forecast: rain followed by showers."
    # You cannot wait for a day with "showers and sun breaks."
    # Have no concept of humidity without precipitation.
    # Know that Boring is a town in Oregon and not just a state of mind.
    # Can point to at least two volcanoes, even if you cannot see through the cloud cover.
    # You exclaim "the mountain is out" when it is a pretty day and you can actually see it.
    # Put on your shorts when the temperature gets above 50, but still wear your hiking boots and Gore-Tex coat.
    # Switch to your sandals when it gets about 60, but keep the socks on.
    # Have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.
    # Think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists.
    # Buy new sunglasses every year, because you can't find the old ones after such a long time.
    # You use a down comforter in the summer.
    # You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit under a raincoat.
    # You know all the important seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Raining (spring), Road Construction (summer), and Deer & Elk season (Fall).
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Richmond Jake's avatar
    Aug 2001
    The Emerald Coast
    You know you're in Florida when....

    . The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
    . Hot water comes out of both taps.
    . You can make sun tea instantly.
    . You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
    . The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
    . You discover that in July it only takes two fingers to steer your car.
    . You discover that you can get sunburned through your car windows.
    . You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
    . You break into a sweat the instant you step outdoors at 7:30 am.
    . Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
    . You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
    . The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
    . The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
    . Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard boiled eggs.
    . The cows are giving evaporated milk.
    . The trees are whistling for the dogs.

    How did I do for a newbie??

  23. #23
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
    Aug 2001
    South Milwaukee

    Adding to Mike's Wisconsin list....

    the local paper covers national and international headlines on 1/4 page, but requires 6 pages for sports (5 1/2 pages for the Packers...in July!)

    your best shirt has a big letter G on it.

    you expect to have off of work when ever the Packers are playing.

    you've ever said "Of course they'll win. They're God's team."

    you refer to the Packers as WE.

    someone not from around here complains about the weather, you've told them to "Wait 5 minutes, it'll change."

    you have experienced frostbite and sunburn in the same week.

    you've worn your winter coat to watch the fire works on the 4th of July.

    you define swimming season as Labor Day weekend.

    you think it's nice enough to swim when the temperature hits 50.

    you decided to have a picnic this summer because it fell on a weekend.

    you design your Halloween costumes to fit over a snowsuit.

    you've taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard.

    you know the 4 seasons: Winter, Still Winter, Almost Winter, and Construction

    the mosquitoes have landing lights.

    you have more miles on your snow blower than your car and.

    your snow blower gets stuck on the roof.

    you owe more money on your snowmobile than your car.

    driving is better in the winter because the potholes get filled with snow.

    snow tires come standard on all your cars.

    you and your spouse own a "winter car" while the "good one" sits in the garage from Nov-Apr.

    in winter, the trunk of your car or your garage doubles as a deep freezer.

    you go out for fish fry every Friday.

    you define summer as three months of bad sledding.

    you drink soda and refer to your dad as pop.

    your spouse uses ketchup on a charcoal grilled NY strip steak.

    a brat is something you eat.

    you frequently clean grease off your barbecue so the raccoons won't prowl on your deck.

    you only know three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.

    Fleet-Farm on any Saturday is busier than the toy stores at Christmas.

    you think a cultural night out is 3 games at the bowling alley wearing a collared shirt.

    you attended a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry and your snow boots, or worse, your galoshes.

    your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new machine shed.

    a Friday night out is taking your girlfriend shining for deer.

    you have been to a woods party.

    you live in a house that has no front steps, yet the door is one yard above the ground.

    you think everyone from south of Madison has an accent.

    you can identify a Michigan accent.

    down South to you means Chicago.

    traveling coast to coast means going from Superior to Milwaukee.

    you know that Eau Claire is not something you eat.

    you have no problem spelling Milwaukee.

    you can make sense out of the words "upnort" and "Trivers".

    you have to go to Florida to get a tan in August.

    My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty, and that's the law.

    you consider Madison exotic.

    you know where the city of Waunakee is AND can pronounce it.

    you can visit Luxemburg, Holland, Belgium, Denmark, Berlin, New London & Poland all in one afternoon.

    you can actually pronounce Oconomowoc.

    you can recognize someone from Illinois from their driving.

    you think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons.

    formal wear is a flannel shirt, blue jeans & a baseball cap.

    you buy cat litter every winter, but you don't own a cat.

    at least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant or cannery.

    you think the start of deer hunting season is a national holiday.

    you have 10 favorite recipes for venison.

    you know which leaves make good toilet paper.

    you find -20F a little chilly.

    you enjoy Popsicle's or fudgesicles in the dead of winter, although it is murder on your lips!

    shoveling the driveway constitutes a great upper body workout.

    your definition of a small town is one that only has one bar.

    you were unaware there is a legal drinking age.

    you know what to do with a Blatz.

    you don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon.

    you've seen a hodag.

    you know what a bubbler is.

    you know how to polka.

  24. #24
    Cyburbian Salmissra's avatar
    Aug 2004
    Central Texas
    Quote Originally posted by Suburb Repairman
    Here's one for Houston, though it focuses on the Houston Rules of the Road. Salmissra may be the only one that can really appreciate this.

    Houston Rules of the Road


    18. When in doubt, remember that all unmarked exits lead to Louisiana.

    19. You don't have to wait for an exit to get off a freeway, just follow the ruts in the grass to the feeder road like everyone else. This is how Houston residents notify Texas Department of Transportation where exits should have been built.

    The last one is my favorite.
    A coworker emailed this list to me back when I started here. I was thinking about that when I read through these. Most of them are so true!! There another one that reads something like:

    Exits to Dallas do not mean the City of Dallas. Unless you want a "scenic" tour of downtown, do not exit for Dallas.

    In Dallas, we used to tease that Houston drivers drove to maim and kill. Now that I'm in Houston, I know it's not a teasing matter!
    "We do not need any other Tutankhamun's tomb with all its treasures. We need context. We need understanding. We need knowledge of historical events to tie them together. We don't know much. Of course we know a lot, but it is context that's missing, not treasures." - Werner Herzog, in Archaeology, March/April 2011

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