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Thread: The limerick contest thread

  1. #1
    Cyburbian jordanb's avatar
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    The limerick contest thread

    So you think your mind is clever
    let's see if you can deliver
    make five, in line
    have fun, and rhyme
    the end should be a rip-snorter

    the limerick is lines of five
    the scheme? AABBA, jive?
    three As three feet
    two Bs, two feet.
    these suck, I know, now dive!
    Last edited by jordanb; 21 Mar 2005 at 11:36 PM.

  2. #2
    Cyburbian Budgie's avatar
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    The Mayor said to me
    Let's provide the infrastructure for free
    I said, it's not in the budget
    How will the public judge it
    Since the developer is in your family.

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
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    To call me an incessant post-padder
    Is only going to make this Bear madder
    So I'll give you this five (5)
    Like doing the "Jordan Jive"
    And then go empty my bladder.

    Bear

  4. #4
    Cyburbian donk's avatar
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    More info on limericks here and past planning samples

    http://www.cyburbia.org/forums/showt...light=limerick
    Too lazy to beat myself up for being to lazy to beat myself up for being too lazy to... well you get the point....

  5. #5
    Cyburbian jordanb's avatar
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    While it seems you've managed to rhyme
    Your meter is worse than mine
    so I fear
    it's very clear
    these planners can not keep time

  6. #6
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    I think that this contest is daft
    Being neither an art nor a craft
    So please do excuse me
    If I fail to enthuse thee
    with yet another cheap laugh(t)
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  7. #7
    moderator in moderation Suburb Repairman's avatar
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    Inspired from recent events:


    There once was a woman named Hazel
    whose boss had a voice t'was quite nasal
    She sent planners email
    They said "what the hell?!"
    as their anger began to sizzle!

    "Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."

    - Herman Göring at the Nuremburg trials (thoughts on democracy)

  8. #8
    The suburbian non-planner's lament:

    I don't like the cars in the 'burbs.
    I'd rather be eating bird turds.
    But smart growth enforced
    by planners, of course,
    Helps all of us live in New Urb's.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    There once was a woman named Michele
    Who attended the conference a short spell
    She walked all over the city
    Her poor feet you should pity
    After all that, they ached and did swell.



    Hey, I am feeling ever so sorry for myself ...for a jillian reasons .... and this seemed like a good way to whine.

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Duke Of Dystopia's avatar
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    It is obvious I can not do Haiku
    My meetering you did boo
    The feelings of this fellow you did hurt
    Left me crying tears upon my shirt
    But alas you are not near so I may smite the with a shoe!




    All in good fun JB!

    Is that a little better?
    I can't deliver UTOPIA, but I can create a HELL for you to LIVE in :)DoD:(

  11. #11
    Cyburbian Duke Of Dystopia's avatar
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    I see three rats of ill noted fame
    Indecision, Revision, and Frustration by name
    Developers, bosses, and residents run amok
    Dystopian schemes covered in muck
    All of them a planners bane

    To much fun!
    I can't deliver UTOPIA, but I can create a HELL for you to LIVE in :)DoD:(

  12. #12
    Cyburbian jordanb's avatar
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    My man your poem is bad
    but the effort makes me glad
    beat with that shoe
    a rhythm true
    and master this here fad

  13. #13
    Cyburbian Mtn Woman's avatar
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    Haven't you all done enough
    Of this word play and assorted stuff
    I don't understand
    How you people can band
    Together, when talking this silly fluff!

  14. #14
    Gosh, this is fun. I haven't written limericks since 5th grade.

    You all must have not studied music,
    For you would know rhythm and use it.
    Your word count is bad;
    It's making me sad,
    But now it's too late, you've abused it!

  15. #15
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Alaithea
    You all must have not studied music,
    For you would know rhythm and use it.
    Your word count is bad;
    It's making me sad,
    But now it's too late, you've abused it!
    Even were I a dutiful student
    Learning music to help my poetry ... wouldn't
    For tone deaf I am
    Yes, I am, yes I am,
    Besides which, for me, it was just a vent.

  16. #16
    Cyburbian sisterceleste's avatar
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    We had to write a limerick when I was a senior in high school.
    Since I was under the impression they were suppose to be "off-color", I turned this one in:

    There once was a man from Tibet
    Who knew what he wanted to get.
    He went to the store
    And asked for a whore
    And got six sexy brunettes!!

    Well, apparently, I was not the only one to turn in that was a bit "off-color" and the stuffy old English teacher has a mouthful to say to us.

  17. #17
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    AIB our dear SisterCeleste...

    Does anyone remember the limerick about the "buxom lass"? (You can imagine what "buxom" rhyhmes with. )




  18. #18
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    South Milwaukee
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    Poster Jordanb arrived
    Though his thoughts seemed really contrived
    We gave him a chance
    Through no happenstance
    He has no TV we've derived

  19. #19
    This limerick is based on a true story from last summer:

    I spoke to this man from Texas
    A land "you ought not mess with"
    He wanted five sheds
    "No way!" say our regs
    So he called me a "damn commie planner"

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