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Thread: Faith Based Manufacturing (Offensive Humor Ahead :))

  1. #1

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    Faith Based Manufacturing (Offensive Humor Ahead :))

    From Jesus' General


    Neal Wade
    Alabama Development Office

    Dear Mr. Wade,

    Have you read what Toyota President Katsuaki Watanabe said recently while visiting the French in Ontario? Here it is in case you missed it:


    [Watanabe] said Nissan and Honda have encountered difficulties getting new plants up to full production in recent years in Mississippi and Alabama due to an untrained - and often illiterate - workforce. In Alabama, trainers had to use "pictorials" to teach some illiterate workers how to use high-tech plant equipment.

    We have to do something about that. No, I'm not saying that we should raise taxes to fund public schools--I hate communism. Homeschooling and Christian schools are giving our children a fine Christ-based education. We don't need any fancy ciphering or reading knowledge beyond what's required to read the Bible and neither does Toyota. We just need to educate a few CEOs.

    Perhaps the Alabama Development Office could pilot a demonstration Intelligent Design automobile manufacturing plant. Just bring in a few raw materials, say a prayer, and wait for God to put it all together.

    Please consider it. By investing now in faith-based manufacturing, Alabama could become the leader in implementing modern conservative values.

    Heterosexually yours,

    Gen. JC Christian, patriot

    A helmet tip to reader Mark Twang

  2. #2
    Cyburbian abrowne's avatar
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    Which is it? The french, or Ontario?

    I mean... teehee.

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Big Owl's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by BKM
    [Watanabe] said Nissan and Honda have encountered difficulties getting new plants up to full production in recent years in Mississippi and Alabama due to an untrained - and often illiterate - workforce. In Alabama, trainers had to use "pictorials" to teach some illiterate workers how to use high-tech plant equipment.
    What did they expect when they broke the piggy bank to lure these companies with deals worth hundreds of millions of dollars... what nissan and honda think?

    My intial thoughts when i saw the thread topic was what is someone opening an "ark plant"

  4. #4
    Quote Originally posted by BKM

    [Watanabe] said Nissan and Honda have encountered difficulties getting new plants up to full production in recent years in Mississippi and Alabama due to an untrained - and often illiterate - workforce. In Alabama, trainers had to use "pictorials" to teach some illiterate workers how to use high-tech plant equipment.
    You just hit on a very sore point with me: high school graduation rates in the U.S. They are absolutely appalling...and, no, Mississippi and Alabamba are not the worst...and how can we expect to earn "family wage-earning" jobs when up to 50% of our children in some states do not even make it through high school?

    I recently worked with a company completing a major expansion locally and adding 130 new good-paying manufacturing jobs with benefits. The two criteria for employment were that applicants had to have either a HS diploma or GED and the individual had to be able to work a 12 hour shift. It took an amazingly long time for these positions to be filled. The HR person told me that the diploma/GED criteria was the reason she had to reject most of the applicants. RANT!

    http://www.unitedhealthfoundation.or...ts/hsgrad.html

  5. #5
    Cyburbian silentvoice's avatar
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    if the bible is too tough to read, make it into a comic... even better!

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally posted by abrowne
    Which is it? The french, or Ontario?

    I mean... teehee.
    By being anti-war, the residents of Ontario are, by definition, "French"

  7. #7
          jhboyle's avatar
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    didn't someone warn Toyota and Honda of the inherent risks to locate a high tech manufacturing facility in this region of the US.

  8. #8
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    What a hoot!
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    I like to point out the irony behind Alabama's bid for the Toyota plant in Montgomery. The state forked over $100 million in incentives for the 6000 jobs they predicted would be created (Toyota will hire 2000 and the rest are supposed to evolve as a result of the plant). This was done at a time when the three-county metropolitan region had 2000 people listed as unemployed. Yes, that is 2000 people to fill 6000 jobs. Math skills required.
    Anyone want to adopt a dog?

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Plus
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    Anybody remember Airbus's announcement on locating in Mobile, AL ?
    Wouldn't aviation require even a higher skill set than automotive ?
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  11. #11
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    On a serious note, I've seen all sorts of businesses, mostly in the South, wearing a "Christian" label on their sleeves. (Note when I say "Christian" here, I don't mean mainstream Lutherans or Presbyterians, but the more evanglican anf fundamentalist folks who tend to use the word as a self-descriptive adjective far more.) Christian real estate agents, Christian towing, Christian home improvements, and so on; fish drawings and Bible quotes on trucks; and the occasional name like "Christ Jesus is Savior Septic Tank Service" or "God Is The Answer Porta-Potty."

    Anyhow, what if a US-based consumer hard goods manufacturer adopted the "Christian" label, and promoted it like the born-again real estate agents and accountants? It's been demonstrated that some people are willing to vote against their best interests, because their preferred candidate is born again. Those same people will probably be willing to pay more for a coffee maker or combination lock made in the US if it claims to be manufactured by fundamentalist Christians, with a percentage of the profits going for ... oh, missionary work to Iraq or something like that.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  12. #12
    Cyburbian Otis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNA
    Anybody remember Airbus's announcement on locating in Mobile, AL ?
    Wouldn't aviation require even a higher skill set than automotive ?
    Ahh. That would explain why Boeing is supporting Airbus's move to Alabama.

  13. #13
    Cyburbian Big Owl's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    Anyhow, what if a US-based consumer hard goods manufacturer adopted the "Christian" label, and promoted it like the born-again real estate agents and accountants? It's been demonstrated that some people are willing to vote against their best interests, because their preferred candidate is born again. Those same people will probably be willing to pay more for a coffee maker or combination lock made in the US if it claims to be manufactured by fundamentalist Christians, with a percentage of the profits going for ... oh, missionary work to Iraq or something like that.
    It works for Chick-fil-a. I know they are retail and not a manufacturer. It is the only fast food resturant that my "holyier than thou" (KJV - Thou vs. You) former roomate you wanted to be a catholic priest untill he figured out you had to be catholic and celibate but back to my point... it is the only place he would go and eat the strange thing is if he went anywhere else he was there to "witness" and while he was there he would eat, that's how he justified waffle house anyways. But it was because of them being closed on sundays and their support of the local christian community, so he said.

  14. #14
    Member Wulf9's avatar
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    Another article on the Toyota choice to move pointed out that Canada's health care system was a reason for the move. Nothing to do with faith based mfg, but another issue that is sorely hurting the American economy.

  15. #15
    Cyburbian AubieTurtle's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Big Owl
    It works for Chick-fil-a....
    I interviewed at Chick-fil-a a few months ago. It was like being in Salt Lake City. Everyone was very clean cut and overly polite. While waiting for the interviewer, every person who walked by asked if I needed some water or anything else. It was nice but kind of creepy. They also have very strict rules about not working overtime because you are suppose to have time to spend with your family. It's probably a good thing they went with one of our other consultants because as nice as they were done there, it would have only been a matter of time before a swear word accidently slipped out of my mouth.

    The other funny thing is that when driving in to the grounds, there is a small lake with an island that had a large bronze chicken statue on it and the first thing that popped in my mind was the whole thing about false idols and the golden calf.

    Christian or not, I think the employees in the store love the Sunday off policy. How many other fast food jobs have a schedule set up to where you can plan months or even years in advance to be off on a certain day?
    As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron. - H.L. Mencken

  16. #16
    Member DRJ's avatar
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    My problem with Chickfiller is their practice of supporting antigay, antichoice, super-rightwing issues. Because of that, I won't even step foot into one of those places. It gives me the creeps!

  17. #17
    Quote Originally posted by Dan
    On a serious note, I've seen all sorts of businesses, mostly in the South, wearing a "Christian" label on their sleeves. (Note when I say "Christian" here, I don't mean mainstream Lutherans or Presbyterians, but the more evanglican anf fundamentalist folks who tend to use the word as a self-descriptive adjective far more.) Christian real estate agents, Christian towing, Christian home improvements, and so on; fish drawings and Bible quotes on trucks; and the occasional name like "Christ Jesus is Savior Septic Tank Service" or "God Is The Answer Porta-Potty.
    In New Orleans we have "Jesus is Lord Plumbing" Pretty hard to miss those vans...

  18. #18
    Cyburbian jenniplans's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by planninglaw
    In New Orleans we have "Jesus is Lord Plumbing" Pretty hard to miss those vans...
    Guess it gives a new meaning to "Holy s&*%!"

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