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Thread: Glurge Web Design 101

  1. #1
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Glurge Web Design 101

    Anyone else noticing a trend among many in creating Web sites that are over-the-top glurgey and kountry kitschy?

    Some signs of a truly glurgely Web site seem to include:

    1) A page devoted to the owner's cats
    2) Lots of stock clip art
    3) Flowery background and graphics
    4) Very long pages
    5) Forced background MIDI
    6) Poetry, usually sappy
    7) "Christ Jesus" mentioned several times
    8) Tons of oversized, poorly designed "awards," most equally flowery
    9) Lots of links to equally glurgey Web sites
    10) Creator is typially a woman in the Southern United States, in a low-paying occupation i.e. daycare, home healthcare aide
    11) Mentioning unicorns, angels, or some other new agey manifestation of good.

    Here's a few examples ...

    http://www.geocities.com/halogirl_24/links.html
    http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/...8/indexpg2.html
    http://www.perfectsites.com/Sandy/
    http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/.../4602/Home.html
    http://www.geocities.com/elainemarieslittlelantern
    http://www.heavensangel.net

    What's the glurgiest Web site out there? Is there really a book, or another Web site, or some source out there that is actually promoting this type of design?

    By the way, I feel that I should mention that Cyburbia was not recently given these awards.

















    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  2. #2
    Cyburbian Jen's avatar
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    Hey Dan,

    Yikes those sites are dull. I even found a glurge.com.

  3. #3
    Dan you almost forgot to include those sites with annoying mouse "tails" that follow the mouse arrow wherever you go.
    "I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

    - Homer Simpson

  4. #4
    Cyburbian nerudite's avatar
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    Originally posted by jtfortin
    Dan you almost forgot to include those sites with annoying mouse "tails" that follow the mouse arrow wherever you go.
    Yeah... like MarryTheresa. (but don't tell her I said that... or she might show up again in the forum )

  5. #5

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    This shows how awful and juvenile my sense of humor still is, but I recommend Portal of Evil.com. It is a web directory of the bizarre, the banal, the strangely pornographic, and the paranoid. They often feature these kinds of sites-with a morbid twist (their favorite is the "dead baby site").

    Until I discovered the Portal, I had no idea that there was an entire subculture of people who think they are/wish they were animals (furry fandom).www.portal of evil.com

  6. #6
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Here's a pretty cool site that has a ton of links to glurgey, syrupy, sappy Web sites. Check out

    http://www.heartless-bitches.com/ssotw/sappy.shtml

    The links are described in graphic detail, for instance ...

    This site truly has it all: incredibly sappy, amateurish poetry, tacky Romance Novel-cover illustrations, endless references to God, annoying MIDI files, and other treasures nearly too numerous to mention. Those include an over-the-top patriotic tribute to the Victims of Sept 11 (haven't their families suffered enough without these horrendous "tributes?), and a "Virtual Wedding" to Master Genesis- who includes his own turgid stories. There are endless links and tributes and endless poems about their virtual love, including a "First Anniversary Message" which has nearly as many verses as Spenser's "The Faerie Queene". And of course swords, horses, lord 'n' ladies, dragons, illustrations of buxom babes. Some of the pages took what seemed like hours to load but it was worth it, revealing each new atrocity.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  7. #7

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    Cool, Dan. I'll add this to my list of sites.

    The Portal of Evil has shorter, snappier but still pithy descriptions. What makes the Portal great are the forums, wherein people make fun of the site, exchange pornographic attacks, call each other names, and engage in similar juvenile fripperies. I love the Portal.

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