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Thread: Finding out shocking news about someone!

  1. #1
    Cyburbian PlannerByDay's avatar
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    Finding out shocking news about someone!

    Something just happened to me yesterday that I have never happened to me.

    I was talking to my Stepmother on the telephone. During the course of our conversation I mentioned that we had not spoken in nearly a month. She then said well I should tell you about XXXXX .

    Now I won't go into details but she went on to tell me about a friend of a family member who was arrested.

    This person was arrested for something I had never know anyone to be arrested for. What I mean by that is it was not DUI, or possession of a controlled substance, or lack of paying child support, or other "common" or other crimes.

    This person was arrested for a crime that was committed 3-4 years ago and could lead to federal charge.

    Last night I kinda blew it off, but today I can't believe it. I find myself thinking that everytime I saw this person (maybe 3 times a year) they acted like a normal everyday good citizen and in reality they were not what was being projected.

    This is really creeping me out. Has something like this ever happend to another cybubanite.

  2. #2
    Cyburbian Plus Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    Long ago, I was seriously dating a guy who had recently divorced. Up until his cousin told me about the 3 other times he'd been married (he was in his early '30's at the time). Sheesh. Serial husband...

  3. #3
    Forums Administrator & Gallery Moderator NHPlanner's avatar
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    I guess you could say I was kinda shocked when I found out my ex-wife had been corresponding regularly from the day we returned from our honeymoon with a jailed gang member about leaving me for him, and with whom upon release from prison she slept with.

    Then there was the incident earlier this year involving the former Planning Board Chair who was arrested (I'll spare the details here) while my boss and I were in San Fran at APA.

    Both kind of threw me for a loop, obviously the first one a bit more so....
    "Growth is inevitable and desirable, but destruction of community character is not. The question is not whether your part of the world is going to change. The question is how." -- Edward T. McMahon, The Conservation Fund

  4. #4
    Cyburbian Coragus's avatar
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    I was just starting to get into a pretty good relationship with a woman during grad school. She seemed a bit off the wall, and she took some sort of pills that she said was for bi-polar disorder. No big deal, at that time literally over half the people my age that I knew were taking prozac or ritalin for something.

    Then I looked up the medication. It was risperdol (sp?), which the medical dictionary listed as treating "accute scizophrenia". Ooops!

    A couple months later, I actually heard a scizophrenia spokesperson being interviewed by Terry Gross on NPR raving about the difference risperdol made in his life.
    Back home just in time for hockey season!

  5. #5
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Well, I have known friends and relatives who have been sent to the Big House Up the River....but it was not particularly surprising when I heard who it was nand how it happened.
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  6. #6
    Cyburbian jmf's avatar
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    A guy I was friends with when we we little (under age 10) was found guilty of a double homocide. Just weird.

  7. #7
    Cyburbian Greenescapist's avatar
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    My sister told me that our other sister's new husband fathered a child with a woman with whom he had had a one night stand years ago. He paid child support for yours until the woman got married and the new husband adopted the girl. They don't know that I know.

    I've also been surprised a few times (not always, of course!) hearing that someone's gay.

  8. #8
    Cyburbian JNL's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Coragus
    Then I looked up the medication. It was risperdol (sp?), which the medical dictionary listed as treating "accute scizophrenia". Ooops!
    It is possible she may not have lied to you... psychiatric diagnoses are rarely, if ever, clean cut, with symptoms often ranging across a number of possible conditions. My sister was "diagnosed" as bipolar, and later this was changed to a "diagnosis" of schizophrenia. In addition, even today many treatments are almost experimental, in that medications known to assist with one condition will be tried for another, without full understanding of exactly how they work. And, the combo of meds that will work for one person may be quite different to those used by another with similar symptoms. Anyway, that's a bit OT!

    Back on shocking news: I know someone who found out her grandfather had molested her sister when she was about 3. Not nice.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Zoning Goddess
    SNIP SNIP his cousin told me about the 3 other times he'd been married (he was in his early '30's at the time). Sheesh. Serial husband...
    Disgusting. To be married three (3) times. What is our world coming to?
    _____

    Back on topic: A guy I played basketball with for a few years in the mid-1960's disappeared from my life and friends. A few years later we all saw his picture......nice shots of him robbing numerous banks.

    And he was such a good ball player.
    _____

    Serial Bear
    Occupy Cyburbia!

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Habanero's avatar
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    Kinda shocking, I found out someone I knew was sleeping with their separated yet still married boss, got pregnant, and were planning on getting married before his divorce was final. Other than that, no, my life is dull.

    I wouldn't be surprised if I found out something shocking about my neighbor though.. but he creeps me out so time will tell.
    When Jesus said "love your enemies", he probably didn't mean kill them.

  11. #11
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
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    Seems my graduating class from HS has a dying problem. A couple folks I knew died of "mysterious circumstances" "heroine overdose" and other drug/violent related stuff. I even had a friend died from the disease of Not Wearing a Helmit While Riding a Motorcycle
    Just thought I would recognize him, but that shocking ones were the drug/violence related stuff. Some of these guys I used to play football with in the park when we were about 8 or so.
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  12. #12
    Cyburbian JNL's avatar
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    OMG, I just remembered a shock I had that knocked me for a 6... I work with police on local crime and safety issues and go to a weekly meeting at the police station where we talk about current issues and they put up mugshots of the 'baddies' to watch out for.. one week they put up a pic of a sex offender who preyed on young boys... and I recognised the name and face of someone I went through school with! I was friends with his sister and they were a Christian family

  13. #13
    moderator in moderation Suburb Repairman's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNL
    OMG, I just remembered a shock I had that knocked me for a 6... I work with police on local crime and safety issues and go to a weekly meeting at the police station where we talk about current issues and they put up mugshots of the 'baddies' to watch out for.. one week they put up a pic of a sex offender who preyed on young boys... and I recognised the name and face of someone I went through school with! I was friends with his sister and they were a Christian family
    Been there...

    A guy that sat next to me in class was arrested for child molestation about three years ago for having sex with a 12 year old! He seemed fairly normal when I was in school with him, but I guess people change.

    "Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."

    - Herman Göring at the Nuremburg trials (thoughts on democracy)

  14. #14
    Cyburbian boilerplater's avatar
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    This kid I was kind of friends with in junior high killed a man with a hammer. He and a partner were robbing the guy. Probably still in jail. Seemed lieka nice kid when I knew him, maybe a little wild and reckless, but not many 13 year old boys aren't.

    The geekiest-looking most-uptight guy I knew in the F.D. in my hometown was caught embezzeling from the PTA he was the treasurer of. What an ass. I mean their budget couldn't have been more than a few hundred.
    Adrift in a sea of beige

  15. #15
         
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    A few months before I moved to the 'burb where I used to live, there was a scandal when the youth minister of the Methodist Church had sex with a 13 year old girl. I heard vague details from several people, but never heard the perp's last name.

    Several weeks later, I found out that the office manager of the company I worked for lived in the neighboring 'burb. She was very nice, but her living situation seemed odd. Her husband came up in conversation quite frequently, but he never seemed to be around. Like he was gone so frequently that they didn't spend Christmas together. She was quite religious, and he had been to seminary, so I assumed that perhaps they were separated and didn't want to tell anybody for religious reasons.

    One day she mentioned that she used to be the choir director at the Methodist Church. I her if she knew about the Big Scandal, and she nodded. She must have acted normally, because I brought up the Big Scandal in passing several times after that. The whereabouts of her husband were still a mystery. Until one day, I saw a letter in the mail bin from her to him. His current residence - the Local Penitentiary.

    The moral of this story: Even when complaining about something so universally reviled as child molestation, be sure to get last names.

  16. #16
    Cyburbian Mud Princess's avatar
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    About ten years ago, I had a friend who was found to be embezzling from the not-for-profit organization that employed her. She spent very little of the money on herself, so no one suspected anything for a long time. When she bought dinner and drinks for our large circle of friends, or picked up a small gift for one of us, we assumed that she was very generous, or that her parents were helping her out financially.

    I learned about her arrest in the local newspaper. Eventually she was sent to a medium-security prison for women. I have no idea what happened after that, because she didn't keep in touch with anyone - wouldn't return any of our calls. I think she was embarassed.

    I also had quite a shock when I learned that my uncle had fathered a child out of wedlock, long before he was married to my aunt, and that my grandmother had paid child support for years. As an adult, the daughter was able to track down my uncle. At that point, my cousins were in their 20s so she was welcomed as part of the family. She looks a lot like my uncle and my grandmother, too.

  17. #17
    Cyburbian DetroitPlanner's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by PlannerByDay
    Something just happened to me yesterday that I have never happened to me.

    I was talking to my Stepmother on the telephone. During the course of our conversation I mentioned that we had not spoken in nearly a month. She then said well I should tell you about XXXXX .

    Now I won't go into details but she went on to tell me about a friend of a family member who was arrested.

    This person was arrested for something I had never know anyone to be arrested for. What I mean by that is it was not DUI, or possession of a controlled substance, or lack of paying child support, or other "common" or other crimes.

    This person was arrested for a crime that was committed 3-4 years ago and could lead to federal charge.

    Last night I kinda blew it off, but today I can't believe it. I find myself thinking that everytime I saw this person (maybe 3 times a year) they acted like a normal everyday good citizen and in reality they were not what was being projected.

    This is really creeping me out. Has something like this ever happend to another cybubanite.
    I don't get it. Doesn't this happen everywhere? oh sorry just Detroit. 98 percent good people, 2 percent big time jerks.

  18. #18
    Cyburbian illinoisplanner's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Bear Up North
    Disgusting. To be married three (3) times. What is our world coming to?
    Ha!! I knew this one kid who rode my bus and his mom was remarried 7 times!!! Ironically, his name is the name of the guy in Scarface, so with his messed-up background, we'd all better watch out.
    "Life's a journey, not a destination"
    -Steven Tyler

  19. #19
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    The president of the chamber of commerce, local radio personality, and boy scout leader in a town where I worked is doing twenty years. Did I mention he was a boy scout leader? 'nuff said.
    Anyone want to adopt a dog?

  20. #20
    Cyburbian jordanb's avatar
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    I'm really a girl.

  21. #21
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by jordanb
    I'm really a girl.
    Are we supposed to be shocked?

  22. #22
    Cyburbian jordanb's avatar
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    You're not?

  23. #23
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by jordanb
    You're not?
    I'm not that easily shocked.

  24. #24
    Two guys I used to skateboard with back in high school were convicted for killing some guy in a drug deal. They were always a bit shady, but I never thought anythig like this would come.

    A guy I went to high school with was arrested and coniced because he was managing a Burger King and sleeping with a 16 year old employee (he was 30-ish). The parents found out and called the cops.
    "I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

    - Homer Simpson

  25. #25
    Cyburbian
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    Our high school history class teacher was arrested for embezzling several hundred thousand dollars to pay off a gambling debt. He was also director of the national honors society. Needless to say, we had a substitute the rest of the year.

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