Urban planning community

+ Reply to thread
Page 1 of 3 1 2 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 69

Thread: World's Dumbest Lyrics

  1. #1
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    19,273

    World's Dumbest Lyrics

    Steve Allen used to have this schtick where he would read rock n roll lyrics as if he was reciting lines by Lord Tennyson with lots of serious inflection and clear elocution.
    "There she was (pause)
    Just a-walking down the street (dramatic pause)
    Singing Do wah diddy diddy (pause) dum diddy do."

    Mskis forced me to listen to Black Eye Peas "Lady Lumps" the other day and I was struck by, well, just how stupid the lyrics really were. They were right up there with Steve Miller Band "Abra abracadabra I wanna reach out and grab ya..."

    What gets your vote for the DUMBEST song lyrics of all time? And folks, I forsee tough competition on this score!
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  2. #2
    Forums Administrator & Gallery Moderator NHPlanner's avatar
    Registered
    Apr 1996
    Location
    New Hampshire
    Posts
    7,749
    Def Leppard: Red light, yellow light, green light, go!
    "Growth is inevitable and desirable, but destruction of community character is not. The question is not whether your part of the world is going to change. The question is how." -- Edward T. McMahon, The Conservation Fund

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Coragus's avatar
    Registered
    May 2002
    Location
    Kzoo . . . for now!
    Posts
    1,171
    "Gonna head out to the country, gonna eat me a lot of peaches"

    Sorry, don't know the group. 90's college song.
    The cookies are worth the drive

  4. #4
    maudit anglais
    Registered
    May 1997
    Location
    Odd-a-wah
    Posts
    6,586
    Dumb, but this song always makes me smile.

    They Might Be Giants - Triangle Man
    Particle man, particle man
    Doing the things a particle can
    What’s he like? it’s not important
    Particle man

    Is he a dot, or is he a speck?
    When he’s underwater does he get wet?
    Or does the water get him instead?
    Nobody knows, particle man

    Triangle man, triangle man
    Triangle man hates particle man
    They have a fight, triangle wins
    Triangle man

    Universe man, universe man
    Size of the entire universe man
    Usually kind to smaller man
    Universe man

    He’s got a watch with a minute hand,
    Millenium hand and an eon hand
    When they meet it’s a happy land
    Powerful man, universe man

    Person man, person man
    Hit on the head with a frying pan
    Lives his life in a garbage can
    Person man

    Is he depressed or is he a mess?
    Does he feel totally worthless?
    Who came up with person man?
    Degraded man, person man

    Triangle man, triangle man
    Triangle man hates person man
    They have a fight, triangle wins
    Triangle man

  5. #5
    Cyburbian
    Registered
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Section 14-12-7, 3rd PM
    Posts
    2,096
    Quote Originally posted by Coragus
    "Gonna head out to the country, gonna eat me a lot of peaches"

    Sorry, don't know the group. 90's college song.
    Presidents of USA - Peaches
    ------------------------------------------------
    You're what?... Tin roof, rusted!
    Last edited by noottamevas; 27 Sep 2005 at 2:45 PM.

  6. #6
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
    Registered
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Packing to move out of the icebox.
    Posts
    13,734
    Quote Originally posted by Maister

    Mskis forced me to listen to Black Eye Peas "Lady Lumps" the other day and I was struck by, well, just how stupid the lyrics really were. They were right up there with Steve Miller Band "Abra abracadabra I wanna reach out and grab ya..."
    Hey... I gave the warning that it was like watching an accident of two clown cars in slow motion.

    Others include
    Dont'cha (Pussy Cat Dolls) Sad part is how true it might be for so many guys...
    Wooly Bully (if anyone can figure out what he is saying)
    MM-BOB (Hansen)
    Beautiful People (Marilyn Manson)
    "A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defense of custom. Time makes more converts than reason." - Thomas Paine Common Sense.

  7. #7
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    19,273
    Quote Originally posted by Tranplanner
    Dumb, but this song always makes me smile.

    They Might Be Giants - Triangle Man
    I'm sorry, but the source must be considered as well. Coming from TMBG we may conclude the lyrics are hilariously ironic. That's a good song.

    I'm thinking more along the lines of a strategy session where Black Eye Peas has already figured out the brilliant melody (oh wait, its just a rhythm ) and is brainstorming for lyrics:
    "Okay what rhymes with 'they love my lady lumps'.....? I believe we should try to stay with the subtle sexual double entendre theme already established." "Say, Charles, I know what might serve admirably - how about 'a-hump a-hump a-hump'?" "By Jove, that will work splendidly!" "And by all means I believe those very lyrics should lend themselves quite well to some interpretive choreography for the live shows....."
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  8. #8

    Registered
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Solano County, California
    Posts
    6,468
    I listen to a lot of gothy stuff. The lyrics are not "stupid" in the same way, but they can certainly be pretentious. Still, I prefer pretentious to banal.

    My favorite, oh so serious and oh so poetic lyrics are from the French Neoclassical-Black Metal ensemble "Elend."

    3. Moon Of Amber

    [Premier Repons]

    Umbra,
    We watch the Moon of Amber.
    And again, the Garden mourns its silent dream.
    Unguarded, some fragments of light linger in your sky.
    Were we like sublunary lovers
    Straying on the seas of your heart,
    Sailing down the streams of your mind,
    Soothing your marble face anew...

    Dim... in the shadows of our sun,
    We have been blinded by agony,
    Our dazzling eyes empty of stars,
    Our voices wordless with fear,
    Our ears so envious of deafening,
    Our withdrawing souls longing for death,
    We drowned in a Moon of Amber.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Seabishop's avatar
    Registered
    Nov 2002
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    3,750
    "Your Body is a Wonderland"

    "Aint nothin' wrong . . . with a little bump and grind"

    "All I wanna do is zoom my zoom zoom in your boom boom - Just shake your rump!"

  10. #10
    Cyburbian mgk920's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Appleton, Wisconsin
    Posts
    4,191
    ANYTHING by REM



    Mike

  11. #11
    Cyburbian jmello's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Clayobyrne, CB
    Posts
    2,580
    "Shake it like a salt shaker." An awfully poor attempt at metaphor. I think.

  12. #12
    moderator in moderation Suburb Repairman's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2003
    Location
    at the neighboring pub
    Posts
    5,574
    Quote Originally posted by Seabishop
    "Your Body is a Wonderland"
    How about anything by John Mayer? I hate that damn "Daughters" song!!

    Even though I like their music (feel good happy summer music), the lyrics for DMB songs are a little off.

    Mmmmmmm...Mmmmmmm...Mmmmmmm...Mmmmmm by Crash Test Dummies

    "Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."

    - Herman Göring at the Nuremburg trials (thoughts on democracy)

  13. #13
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
    Registered
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Packing to move out of the icebox.
    Posts
    13,734
    Quote Originally posted by jmello
    "Shake it like a salt shaker." An awfully poor attempt at metaphor. I think.
    Not as bad as "shake it like a polaroid. picture" Speaking of which... Outkast’s Hey Yah ranks up there.
    "A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defense of custom. Time makes more converts than reason." - Thomas Paine Common Sense.

  14. #14
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    19,273
    Quote Originally posted by BKM
    I listen to a lot of gothy stuff. The lyrics are not "stupid" in the same way, but they can certainly be pretentious. Still, I prefer pretentious to banal. .
    Good point. Let's not forget the Blue Oyster Cult classic:
    I have this feeling that my luck is none too good
    This sword here at my side don’t act the way it should
    Keeps calling me it’s master, but I feel like it’s slave
    Hauling me faster and faster to an early, early grave
    And it howls! it howls like hell!

    I’m told it’s my duty to fight against the law
    That wizardry’s my trade and I was born to wade through gore
    I just want to be a lover, not a red-eyed screaming ghoul
    I wish it’d picked another to be it’s killing tool

    Black blade, black blade
    Forged a billion years ago
    Black blade, black blade
    Killing so it’s power can grow

    It’s death from the beginning to the end of time
    And I’m the cosmic champion and I hold a mystic sign
    And the whole world’s dying and the burden’s mine
    And the black sword keeps on killing ’til the end of time

    Black blade, black blade
    Bringing chaos to the world we know
    Black blade, black blade
    And it’s using me to kill my friends
    Black blade, black blade
    Getting stronger so the world will end
    Black blade, black blade
    Forcing my mind to bend and bend

    I am the black blade
    Forged a million billion years ago
    My cosmic soul it goes on for eternity
    Carving out destiny
    Bringing in the lords of chaos
    Bringing up the beasts of hades
    Sucking out the souls of heroes
    Laying waste to knights and ladies
    My master is my slave
    Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  15. #15
    Cyburbian jmello's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Clayobyrne, CB
    Posts
    2,580
    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis
    Not as bad as "shake it like a polaroid. picture" Speaking of which... Outkast’s Hey Yah ranks up there.
    I respectfully disagree. "Shake it like a Polaroid picture" is pretty creative to me. But, I have loved OutKast since Southernplayalistic......

  16. #16

    Registered
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Solano County, California
    Posts
    6,468
    Quote Originally posted by Maister
    Good point. Let's not forget the Blue Oyster Cult classic:

    This song is based on a character created by the Anglo-Texan fantasy novelist Michael Moorcock (The Elric saga) a multi-volume series about a vampiric nonhuman wandering warrior king. The black blade was Elric's vampire sword which drained the life force of enemies to keep Elric hale and hearty.

    Mr. Moorcock was heavily involved in writing lyrics for Blue Oyster Cult. He is one of the best sword and sorcery writers out there (if you're into that kind of stuff, which I can be )

  17. #17
    Cyburbian illinoisplanner's avatar
    Registered
    May 2005
    Location
    The Fox Valley
    Posts
    4,961
    Blog entries
    1
    Anything by Nirvana.

    "... my denial, an albino; a mosquito, my libido"

    Surprisingly it makes for awesome music though. Whatever rhymes and Kurt could remember is the basis of Nirvana's lyrics.
    "Life's a journey, not a destination"
    -Steven Tyler

  18. #18
    Cyburbian Wannaplan?'s avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Gale Crater
    Posts
    2,884
    No group is as awful as REO Speedwagon. Take a sample lyric from Can't Fight This Feeling and see how fast your stomach churns:

    And I can't fight this feeling anymore.

    I've forgotten what I started fighting for.

    It's time to bring this ship into the shore,

    And throw away the oars, forever.
    Here's the clearest sign of gut-wrenching lyrics - Constant rhyming with words that are clunky and metaphorically distant from the emotional essence of the song's message. All while lacking any sense of irony or wit.

    The case in point, I don't know what ship, shore, and oars have to do with not being able to fight a feeeling. Further, what do those images have to do with love per se? Might as well as be singing of a whore that is a bore and won't put out anymore. What about a door over a floor at the record store? Or the feeling of watching Gore lose an election to a boor while drinking Coors?

    It's just horrible, those lyrics by REO Speedwagon. Nothing is worse.

  19. #19
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    19,273
    Quote Originally posted by BKM
    This song is based on a character created by the Anglo-Texan fantasy novelist Michael Moorcock (The Elric saga) a multi-volume series about a vampiric nonhuman wandering warrior king. The black blade was Elric's vampire sword which drained the life force of enemies to keep Elric hale and hearty.

    Mr. Moorcock was heavily involved in writing lyrics for Blue Oyster Cult. He is one of the best sword and sorcery writers out there (if you're into that kind of stuff, which I can be )
    I guess that would make me World's Dumbest Lyrics Critic , cuz I always assumed Black Blade, like a million and one other metal tunes, was yet another pretentious tune worthy of Spinal Tap!
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  20. #20
    Cyburbian Michele Zone's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2003
    Location
    San Diego, CA
    Posts
    7,061
    Off-topic:
    Quote Originally posted by BKM
    This song is based on a character created by the Anglo-Texan fantasy novelist Michael Moorcock (The Elric saga) a multi-volume series about a vampiric nonhuman wandering warrior king.
    I don't recall Elric being vampiric. His sword was -- kinda. It ate souls. I remember him as albino. But I have -- thankfully! -- mostly forgotten those books. So maybe I am wrong.

  21. #21
    Cyburbian ICT/316's avatar
    Registered
    May 2005
    Location
    Kansas (Lurking)
    Posts
    490
    CHORUS
    "YOU’RE MOTORING!!!!!

    What's your price for flight

    In finding mister right

    You'll be all right tonight"

    - Night Ranger

    I was actually joking to a friend once, that this song was a good example of people singing the wrong lyrics. I would sometimes belt out, “MOTORING”, for no reason other than we thought it was funny. I never really thought that was what they were really saying, til I looked up the lyrics.LOL. What the Fudge is “Motoring”?

    Bill



    [playing flute solo] “Hey, Aqualung!”

    - Ron Burgundy

  22. #22
    Cyburbian illinoisplanner's avatar
    Registered
    May 2005
    Location
    The Fox Valley
    Posts
    4,961
    Blog entries
    1
    Quote Originally posted by ICT/316
    CHORUS
    "YOU’RE MOTORING!!!!!

    What's your price for flight

    In finding mister right

    You'll be all right tonight"

    - Night Ranger

    I was actually joking to a friend once, that this song was a good example of people singing the wrong lyrics. I would sometimes belt out, “MOTORING”, for no reason other than we thought it was funny. I never really thought that was what they were really saying, til I looked up the lyrics.LOL. What the Fudge is “Motoring”?

    Bill



    [playing flute solo] “Hey, Aqualung!”

    - Ron Burgundy
    Actually, I was watching a special on them once, and they said that where they were from, "motoring" was a slang term for street racing or something.

    I guess it was a good place for teenagers to hook up????
    "Life's a journey, not a destination"
    -Steven Tyler

  23. #23
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2003
    Location
    De Noc
    Posts
    19,292
    MacArthur Park

    Someone left the cake out in the rain
    I don't think that I can take it
    'Cause it took so long to bake it
    And I'll never have that recipe again
    Oh, no!
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  24. #24

    Registered
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Solano County, California
    Posts
    6,468
    Quote Originally posted by Michele Zone
    Off-topic:

    I don't recall Elric being vampiric. His sword was -- kinda. It ate souls. I remember him as albino. But I have -- thankfully! -- mostly forgotten those books. So maybe I am wrong.
    HA! HA! BIGGER NERD! BIGGER NERD!

    LOL. You are correct. Elric's vampirism was indirect.

    SPOILER ALERT












    At the very end of the classic "Elric" sag (Moorcock wrote many offshoots with sideline characters that were "avatars" of Elric in other universes), Elric has just utterly defeated the forces of Chaos and recreated the Universe anew. His sword then consumes Elric so that Chaos and Evil can have a foothold in this new universe. Probably a bad descirption of the storyline, but I thought that was a neat twist.

  25. #25
    Cyburbian Zoning Goddess's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 1999
    Location
    400 miles from Orlando
    Posts
    13,837
    How about that '70's song "Wildfire"? I can't remember all the lyrics, but they were awful.

+ Reply to thread
Page 1 of 3 1 2 ... LastLast

More at Cyburbia

  1. Replies: 17
    Last post: 17 Dec 2008, 11:09 PM
  2. Replies: 10
    Last post: 17 Mar 2008, 8:43 AM
  3. What was your dumbest purchase ever?
    Friday Afternoon Club
    Replies: 39
    Last post: 14 Mar 2008, 9:21 PM
  4. Replies: 3
    Last post: 15 Feb 2006, 9:12 AM
  5. Replies: 15
    Last post: 05 Feb 2004, 11:13 AM