Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later and one would expect it in Junior High. Apparently my son got into an altercation. He claims to have fell in the shower at school, but everyone knows better. I could pull out all the cliques and probably will, but with my own twist. Here's how I intend on handling it.
1. Make sure that his mother doesn't over react. The last thing he needs is his mommy looking out for him. He needs to work through this on his own.
2. Ask him what happened? Although I expect him to tow the "slipped" line.
3. OK, but.... I'll say here's what it looks like to me.
4. Let him know that if there was a fight, it is best to talk about it. It will make you feel better to get it off your chest and reassure him that his parents won't interfere unless he wants us to. He needs to deal with the anxiety himself, because this won't be the last time.
5. I'll give him the pacifist manifesto .... the other person has a low self esteem probably due to a poor homelife. The bigger man is the one who through actions says, "You don't intimidate me and I will not alter my life to avoid you". Have the "I feel sorry for you and take pity on you since your life is so morose that you have to lash out".
6. The bigger person hold out his/her hand.
7. What would MLK do? There's a reason an MLK memorial is being built and not a Mike Tyson memorial.
I guess the bottom line is that he needs to understand that we are here to listen, but this is a lesson in life that he is going to need to work through on his own. He has friends and family around him who are willing listeners and won't be quick to just. This might also explains his recent lack of attention to academics. I constantly have to remind his mother that Junior High is a very awkward time and that his mind is on many things other than school work. It's hard to concentrate on school when social and physical change is occuring.
Anyway, what are your experiences and thoughts on the matter.