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Thread: The NEVERENDING Dating Thread

  1. #1326
    Cyburbian
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    Quote Originally posted by Zoning Goddess View post
    Gotta wonder what the dating folks think of this:

    http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/lifestyl...er-goes-viral/

    I always thought women playing with their hair was a sign of boredom, waiting for the traffic light to change...
    If this is for real, he sounds like a needy, stalker type person that probably scared her off before dessert.

  2. #1327
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Huh? Women playing with their hair is a common sign of flirtation? First I've heard of it. I tend to agree more with the boredom theory.

    Okay, for the record I have to ask this question (and guys like Dan should take note of the answers)...

    Women: list the ways you flirt or try to convey that you like someone in either dating and non-dating situations. Is playing with your hair even on your top 50?

  3. #1328
    Cyburbian DetroitPlanner's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    Women: list the ways you flirt or try to convey that you like someone in either dating and non-dating situations. Is playing with your hair even on your top 50?
    I a woman played with my hair I would definitely consider it a sign of flirting.
    We hope for better things; it will arise from the ashes - Fr Gabriel Richard 1805

  4. #1329
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    The deerslaying Outback is going to be a major setback in my dating life. There's no more peer matches around here on the online dating sites, so in recent months most of my dates have been in Syracuse or Binghamton. Can't hit I-81 at night during the winter with one headlight and a hood that's jammed closed.

    A strange observation: about 20% of the women with profiles on OkCupid around claim to own a motorcycle, more often than not a Harley. It's not just the self-proclaimed "simple country girls", but also educated city-dwellers. Of all the women I know, none have ever owned a Harley. Sure, they might fantasize about it if they win the lottery, but in reality, no. Do biker chicks have a greater tendency to use online dating? Do large numbers of middle-aged women run out and buy motorcycles after they get divorced?
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  5. #1330
    Cyburbian stroskey's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by DetroitPlanner View post
    I a woman played with my hair I would definitely consider it a sign of flirting.
    Oh yeah - if a woman plays with your hair it's va-va-vroom and you're ready to go!

    Except if you're married.
    I burned down the church to atone for my transgressions.

  6. #1331
    Cyburbian TerraSapient's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    Women: list the ways you flirt or try to convey that you like someone in either dating and non-dating situations.
    1. I talk about exploring space (everyone harbors a secret adoration for nerds)
    2. I dazzle them with my sweet dance moves
    3. I let them talk about their mothers

    That pretty much seals the deal.
    Occupy Your Brain!

  7. #1332
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
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    Question -

    Can you hurt somebody you never met feelings when you didn't show up for a party ?
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  8. #1333
    Cyburbian dandy_warhol's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNA View post
    Question -

    Can you hurt somebody you never met feelings when you didn't show up for a party ?
    Yep. They were probably looking forward to meeting you and disappointed that you didn't show.

  9. #1334
    Cyburbian btrage's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNA View post
    Question -

    Can you hurt somebody you never met feelings when you didn't show up for a party ?
    Short answer - yes.

    But it depends on the "relationship".
    "I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany"

  10. #1335
    Cyburbian dw914er's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan View post
    The deerslaying Outback is going to be a major setback in my dating life. There's no more peer matches around here on the online dating sites, so in recent months most of my dates have been in Syracuse or Binghamton. Can't hit I-81 at night during the winter with one headlight and a hood that's jammed closed.
    On the flipside, I don't think there is a Subaru out there that could improve one's dating life anyways. I've never met a girl that liked my Subaru. A BMW or Mercedes, yes, but no Subaru's

    I have no clue about the motorcycles though. Maybe after their divorce, they decided they liked the rumble from their husband's Harley more than their husband

  11. #1336
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by dandy_warhol View post
    Yep. They were probably looking forward to meeting you and disappointed that you didn't show.
    Need help - how to mend this rift.
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  12. #1337
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by dw914er View post
    On the flipside, I don't think there is a Subaru out there that could improve one's dating life anyways. I've never met a girl that liked my Subaru. A BMW or Mercedes, yes, but no Subaru's
    Around here, you won't impress anyone with a BMW or Mercedes.

    If the car is a total loss, which the body shop still has to determine, I'm looking at two options:

    1) Lease a new Subaru Impreza. I don't like the idea of payments, but lease terms are pretty good right now, since Subies hold their value well.

    2) Buying a used Saab. Wait a minute; I know you're thinking "Hey, they're bankrupt!" Exactly. Used Saabs are being sold around here -- or at least in Rochester and Syracuse -- at fire-sale prices now. You can get a lot of Saab for $6K-$7K now, and parts will still be available for years to come. A 9-5 wagon would be perfect, but I can deal with a 9-3 sedan.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  13. #1338
    Cyburbian dandy_warhol's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNA View post
    Need help - how to mend this rift.
    Did you tell her you were going to go and then just not show up? Did you let her know that you weren't going to make it?

    I would just apologize and tell her you were being a dope and not thinking and that you're sorry you hurt her feelings. Maybe ask if there is a way you can make it up to her.

  14. #1339
    Cyburbian illinoisplanner's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNA View post
    Need help - how to mend this rift.
    I've hurt people's feelings by not showing up to things. And these were people that are good friends of mine!

    The best way is to just send a note or make a call saying you're sorry you didn't make it and just explain why you didn't come. Then say that you were looking forward to seeing them and offer to meet up with them some other time in the near future for coffee or lunch sometime.
    "Life's a journey, not a destination"
    -Steven Tyler

  15. #1340
    Cyburbian
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    Quote Originally posted by JNA View post
    Need help - how to mend this rift.
    Apologize, sincerely. Don't make up excuses, just say that you're sorry and wish it didn't happen. Then ask for another chance to get together, if it was that kind of date.

  16. #1341
    Cyburbian Veloise's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by kms View post
    Apologize, sincerely. Don't make up excuses, just say that you're sorry and wish it didn't happen. Then ask for another chance to get together, if it was that kind of date.
    And be forthright. Feel free to tell her that you're unaccustomed to socializing and you could use some pointers. Women tend to think that honesty is charming, and look forward to laying a trail of man-treats leading out of the cave.

  17. #1342
    Cyburbian
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    Quote Originally posted by Veloise View post
    And be forthright. Feel free to tell her that you're unaccustomed to socializing and you could use some pointers. Women tend to think that honesty is charming, and look forward to laying a trail of man-treats leading out of the cave.
    I don't know if I'd tell her that you're unaccustomed to socializing; I know that I wouldn't want to hear that. Hearing that would make me think that you might not be someone to socialize with, that there's a reason that people don't want to be around you. (Now, we all know that's not the case with you.)

  18. #1343
    Cyburbian Veloise's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by kms View post
    I don't know if I'd tell her that you're unaccustomed to socializing; I know that I wouldn't want to hear that. Hearing that would make me think that you might not be someone to socialize with, that there's a reason that people don't want to be around you. (Now, we all know that's not the case with you.)
    Okay, make it you're sometimes (!!) shy until you get to know people, and not a lot (!!) of your friends would be at the party.

    Sometimes you have to make the first move. Sometimes you have to respond favorably to that first move...

    ...typed someone willing to drop by for coffee on one of my long road trips a while ago

  19. #1344
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    I start guitar lessons tonight. I'm not doing it to pick up women, but it can't hurt, especially in a town where everybody seems skilled at some kind of musical instrument.

    I'm 46 now. My age range in online dating sites is 38-52. Most of the women that write me are much older than that; usually 54 to 59. I'd still love to know why I'm so popular with women born during the Eisenhower administration. Nothing against older women, but at this age, when they're that much older than me, the age gap really becomes striking. It's also more cross-generational; I'm a late Generation Xer, and have far more in common with Generation Xers and Yers than Baby Boomers.

    Maybe it's demographics. This town has a gap between doctoral students and divorced professors/hippies, where there's not many singles in their 40s. Still, I get women in their mid-to-late 50s from Binghamton and Syracuse writing.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  20. #1345
    Cyburbian Veloise's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan View post
    ...I'm 46 now. My age range in online dating sites is 38-52. Most of the women that write me are much older than that; usually 54 to 59. I'd still love to know why I'm so popular with women born during the Eisenhower administration. Nothing against older women, but at this age, when they're that much older than me, the age gap really becomes striking. It's also more cross-generational; I'm a late Generation Xer, and have far more in common with Generation Xers and Yers than Baby Boomers.

    Maybe it's demographics. This town has a gap between doctoral students and divorced professors/hippies, where there's not many singles in their 40s. Still, I get women in their mid-to-late 50s from Binghamton and Syracuse writing.
    You are fresh meat, since they've run through everyone within 5 years in their own burgs. HTH

  21. #1346
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Veloise View post
    You are fresh meat, since they've run through everyone within 5 years in their own burgs. HTH
    I just thought it was because ... uhhh, things still probably work among the 40-something crowd.

    Strangely, the age ranges of the majority of WSM profiles in my area have cougarish age ranges: 46 seeking 32-48 and the like.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  22. #1347
    Cyburbian Veloise's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dan View post
    I just thought it was because ... uhhh, things still probably work among the 40-something crowd....
    IME "things still work" amongst peers (I am 55). Maybe you project an attitude that appeals to the boomer demographic.

  23. #1348
    Cyburbian Tarf's avatar
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    Going on my first date today in five years And the last one was an online dating nightmare...

    Here's to hoping it's not so bad again I have to wait another 5 years
    In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. (Douglas Adams)

  24. #1349
    Cyburbian TerraSapient's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Tarf View post
    Going on my first date today in five years And the last one was an online dating nightmare...

    Here's to hoping it's not so bad again I have to wait another 5 years
    Have a good time Tarf!
    Occupy Your Brain!

  25. #1350
    Cyburbian SW MI Planner's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Tarf View post
    Going on my first date today in five years And the last one was an online dating nightmare...

    Here's to hoping it's not so bad again I have to wait another 5 years
    Ohhh, have fun!!!!!

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