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Thread: Thank you gift: letters of reference

  1. #1
    Cyburbian donk's avatar
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    Thank you gift: letters of reference

    IJust wondering if it is appropriate to send a small gift to the people who provided you letters of reference? Thinking a box of golf balls for one guy and a bottle of wine for teh other?

    I am waiting to hear one way or the other before I do it so I can thank them and tell them if I got in or not.

    Will hopefully know in the next 3-4 weeks.
    Too lazy to beat myself up for being to lazy to beat myself up for being too lazy to... well you get the point....

  2. #2
    Cyburbian The District's avatar
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    i think it's Very appropriate...

    my wife came up with the idea of a NICE goodie basket for each letter writer. i think we're going to do that one. who doesn't like goodies? wine is probably good for the majority of folks, but all my letter writers don't drink.

  3. #3
    Super Moderator kjel's avatar
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    Even a nice thank you note hand written is a nice gesture, especially if you share the result of the admission process and your decision.
    "He defended the cause of the poor and needy, and so all went well. Is that not what it means to know me?" Jeremiah 22:16

  4. #4
    Cyburbian fructa's avatar
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    I sent mine gift certificates to wine.com (they're all out of state) and a thank-you card... One prof sent the certificate back, saying it violated his personal code of ethics to accept gifts for doing his job (pesky ethics professor), but the others seemed pleased...

  5. #5
         
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    Handwrite a nice thank you card

    I was thinking about doing the same thing and sought advice from a couple of professors who I know. They both highly discouraged it, saying that it's a nice gesture, however it's symbolic of buying a recommendation. As Fructa put, writing recommendations for former students (or employees) is part of their job. A nice thank you note is sufficient.

  6. #6
    Cyburbian fructa's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Coffeebeans
    As Fructa put, writing recommendations for former students (or employees) is part of their job. A nice thank you note is sufficient.
    I did get one rec from someone who was more of a business associate / mentor, and she did really appreciate the thank-you gift, since her recommendation was nothing other than a huge favor to me. So... it depends.

  7. #7
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    I sent baskets with chocolates to two of mine and a gift cert. to a local golf store to one.... they all were very pleased

  8. #8
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    case by case

    Quote Originally posted by fructa
    I did get one rec from someone who was more of a business associate / mentor, and she did really appreciate the thank-you gift, since her recommendation was nothing other than a huge favor to me. So... it depends.
    Ahhh... relativism. Couldn't agree more! I think the bottom line is you need to consider each reference and your relationship with him/her.

    I was about to send one of my references a gift card, but my wife, who's of the same opinion as Coffeebeans, said that assigning a dollar value to the rec was tacky. Perhaps a tasteful gift from some museum shop...

  9. #9
    I would personally think a small gift would be a perfect way to say thank you and make someone feel appreciated and/or respected. When I refer someone or ask for a letter of reference I take it very seriously so a thank you gift would just make me feel that much better. Go for it!

  10. #10
    Cyburbian el Guapo's avatar
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    I gave Mike Gurnee an engraved pocketflask with some German brandy in it when I got the hell out of Dodge. The engraving said, "I wish I knew how to quit you Mike Gurnee"

  11. #11
    Ideally anything that can be regarded as a token of appreciation can be said to be ideal as far as sending gifts are concerned. For me I would prefer something that would be required for the other person to be used and utilized when in need. But opinions can differ.

  12. #12
    I took my advisor from grad school out for a few beers (of course, he was from Germany so that helped!) after he wrote a great letter of reference for me.
    In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

  13. #13
    Cyburbian
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    Quote Originally posted by WouldBePlanner View post
    I took my advisor from grad school out for a few beers (of course, he was from Germany so that helped!) after he wrote a great letter of reference for me.
    Did the same thing, but that was only because the guy got me my current job through the back door. Never really thought about doing anything with the other people I received letters of recommendations from other than a thank-you note.

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