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Thread: Do you live your life like you work you job?

  1. #1
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Do you live your life like you work you job?

    As planners, we look at current problems and create a full long term and smaller short term plans to correct those problems and create and environment that people want. We analyze the situation, analyze the problems, analyze the connections, and analyze potential solutions all that fall within a set guide of parameters. To help people understand that vision, we create models, charts, graphs, and sketch plans.

    But do you do that in your own life? The average person will earn around 2 Million dollars in their working lifetimes, yet do we have detailed goals and objectives, or even a rough plan for our lives. We all know that our lives will change from time to time, but as planners we realize that there are all sorts of factors ranging from political climate to weather that will cause significant changes in the direction a city will go.

    This is something that I am trying to do more of for my life. I am still young in my career so there is several future goals that I want to achieve in my life. Is this something that you have done? How has it worked?
    Not my monkey, not my circus. - Old Polish Proverb

  2. #2
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Michaelskis
    The average person will earn around 2 Million dollars in their working lifetimes, yet do we have detailed goals and objectives, or even a rough plan for our lives. We all know that our lives will change from time to time, but as planners we realize that there are all sorts of factors ranging from political climate to weather that will cause significant changes in the direction a city will go?
    I’m not sure it’s possible or even advisable to plan for one’s personal life in the same way that one can plan for a community’s, so the analogy may not be altogether fair. Our personal lives tend to be much more ephemeral than a city’s and the things in our lives we prize/value/aspire to today can literally change in the course of a day. Events like the birth of a child, falling in love, a divorce, a prison sentence, a Moment of Clarity, a severe illness, or an automobile accident can and do routinely turn our personal paradigms and universes on their ears. For lack of a better term, these life altering events often carry a spiritual element (not to be confused with ‘religious’, although one’s view could be religious in nature) that cause us to pursue various ‘pilgrimages’ in our lives that could not be planned for, as no provision can be made for a future need that one is not aware will exist.

    Sometimes it is in our best interests to abandon our jobs, shave our heads, join a monastery, shack up, run up an $80,000 cedit card debt, Come Out, or follow that childhood dream of moving to Montana and raising dental floss. As we evolve personally, so do our aims and direction in life; sometimes radically. It would be a pretty big mistake from one perspective to assume that one has all the answers when they are young and can plot out a course for a ‘successful’ existence when one may not even know what constitutes ‘success’.
    Had I, for instance, expended all my energies planning for a future based on my life values/worldviews that I possessed in my youth I can honestly say I would be in worse shape in nearly every respect in my personal life today, except perhaps financially.
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  3. #3
    Cyburbian btrage's avatar
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    To answer your question very simply.....

    No, most people do not have a comprehensive plan for their life. Sure, a lot of people will say that they want to retire by such and such an age with this much money in the bank, but I don't think that's really a "plan".

    However, I think it's a little presumptuous and arrogant to think that we can plan out our entire life. Even the most successful people will tell you that there's always some luck involved or that the path they took to get where they are had lots of unexpected turns along the way. I don't think it's about planning, but just trying to prepare yourself for when the unexpected turns do come (And believe me they will).

    As John Lennon once sang in his song Beautiful Boy:

    "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans."

    Relax, work and play hard, enjoy your life. Don't turn it into a Appendix A of the 2007 Master Plan.

  4. #4
    Super Moderator kjel's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    I’m not sure it’s possible or even advisable to plan for one’s personal life in the same way that one can plan for a community’s, so the analogy may not be altogether fair. Our personal lives tend to be much more ephemeral than a city’s and the things in our lives we prize/value/aspire to today can literally change in the course of a day. Events like the birth of a child, falling in love, a divorce, a prison sentence, a Moment of Clarity, a severe illness, or an automobile accident can and do routinely turn our personal paradigms and universes on their ears. For lack of a better term, these life altering events often carry a spiritual element (not to be confused with ‘religious’, although one’s view could be religious in nature) that cause us to pursue various ‘pilgrimages’ in our lives that could not be planned for, as no provision can be made for a future need that one is not aware will exist.

    Sometimes it is in our best interests to abandon our jobs, shave our heads, join a monastery, shack up, run up an $80,000 cedit card debt, Come Out, or follow that childhood dream of moving to Montana and raising dental floss. As we evolve personally, so do our aims and direction in life; sometimes radically. It would be a pretty big mistake from one perspective to assume that one has all the answers when they are young and can plot out a course for a ‘successful’ existence when one may not even know what constitutes ‘success’.
    Had I, for instance, expended all my energies planning for a future based on my life values/worldviews that I possessed in my youth I can honestly say I would be in worse shape in nearly every respect in my personal life today, except perhaps financially.
    I could not have said it better myself!

    I used to exist in a world where success was defined by my career trajectory, the balance of my bank accounts and investment accounts, the new car, the nice house, etc which was what I thought defined success in my younger years.

    March 13, 2003 my world tilted on its side when my mom died rather unexpectedly. It was turned upside down March 21, 2003 when I was served with divorce papers. We had everything that most people considered to be signs of success. It wasn't enough and now that I look back on it, it was rather empty.

    Four years later and I am in a place 1000 times better than I was. I may not have the fat bank balance anymore, I drive a beater car, live in student housing, etc but I have my dignity, time with my daughter, I finished college and have gone on to grad school, now working at a job I really like rather than at what pays the most. I've had the opportunity to travel to India and meet people I would not have otherwise met and done things I would not have thought of doing before.

    I don't have a plan in place other than getting my daughter through high school school in the next four years and helping her navigate through the pitfalls of the teenage years and off to college.....and I'm ok with that.
    "He defended the cause of the poor and needy, and so all went well. Is that not what it means to know me?" Jeremiah 22:16

  5. #5
    Cyburbian otterpop's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    or follow that childhood dream of moving to Montana and raising dental floss.. .
    It is a pipe dream. Cheap dental floss imports from India and China knocked the bottom out of the dental floss market here. Though there is a niche market for free-range dental floss for some of your specialty stores.

    In regards to Michaelskis' question, I plan for a living, but as far as my life, I unfortunately do as the Jerry Jeff Walker song advises "getting by on getting by is my stock and trade. Living from day to day. Picking up the pieces wherever they fall. . . Just living my life easy come, easy go. . ."
    "I am very good at reading women, but I get into trouble for using the Braille method."

    ~ Otterpop ~

  6. #6
    Cyburbian KSharpe's avatar
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    I already plan for 8 hours a day- I prefer a Taoist method for the rest of my life. Wu wei, non-action. That is, going with the flow of life.
    Do you want to pet my monkey?

  7. #7
    Cyburbian SW MI Planner's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis View post
    As planners, we look at current problems and create a full long term and smaller short term plans to correct those problems and create and environment that people want. We analyze the situation, analyze the problems, analyze the connections, and analyze potential solutions all that fall within a set guide of parameters. To help people understand that vision, we create models, charts, graphs, and sketch plans.

    But do you do that in your own life? Is this something that you have done? How has it worked?
    OH MY GOD YES! Is it right? Probably not. But I do it. The past week I have just been having the same conversation with a friend of mine, and he was like, you can't plan your life out, stop worrying and analyzing so much and just enjoy it. Obviously, I divorced my cheating, slime of a husband, so I am not going to put up with bs to live the life that I have 'planned' on.

    The other quote that comes to mind is "life is a journey, not a destination", and I really need to learn to relax and have some fun. I can, and I do, but I do spend a lot of time thinking about the future. I guess I just don't want to 'miss' anything, so I think about it, but that in and of itself will probably make me miss it.

  8. #8
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by SW MI Planner View post
    OH MY GOD YES! Is it right? Probably not. But I do it. The past week I have just been having the same conversation with a friend of mine, and he was like, you can't plan your life out, stop worrying and analyzing so much and just enjoy it. Obviously, I divorced my cheating, slime of a husband, so I am not going to put up with bs to live the life that I have 'planned' on.

    The other quote that comes to mind is "life is a journey, not a destination", and I really need to learn to relax and have some fun. I can, and I do, but I do spend a lot of time thinking about the future. I guess I just don't want to 'miss' anything, so I think about it, but that in and of itself will probably make me miss it.
    There's nothing at all wrong with analyzing one's life. Who could disagree with Socrates' credo that "an unexamined life is not worth living"? In fact, it can only be through self-reflection that a person determines whether or not their energies in life are directed towards a desirable end. But analyzing whether our past and current actions are in accord with the values we hold is one thing, and being consumed with worry about the future is another.
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  9. #9
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    My fiancée will tease me because it drives me crazy as to how much of a free spirit she is and how much of a planning geek I am. I tend to systematically analyze and plan everything. During a recent road trip to the Upper Peninsula, she asked what I was thinking about, only to learn that I was calculating the potential distance/time ratios based on the current speed, gallon per mile gas consumption, and time. (Hey, I was able to do almost 7 hours on one tank of gas!)

    With the wedding coming up, I am panicking because she has not done any time matrices, cost analysis of different transportation methods for the bridal party, or narrowed down the menu selections. We only have 3 months left!!!
    Not my monkey, not my circus. - Old Polish Proverb

  10. #10
    Cyburbian KSharpe's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis View post
    My fiancée will tease me because it drives me crazy as to how much of a free spirit she is and how much of a planning geek I am. I tend to systematically analyze and plan everything. During a recent road trip to the Upper Peninsula, she asked what I was thinking about, only to learn that I was calculating the potential distance/time ratios based on the current speed, gallon per mile gas consumption, and time. (Hey, I was able to do almost 7 hours on one tank of gas!)

    With the wedding coming up, I am panicking because she has not done any time matrices, cost analysis of different transportation methods for the bridal party, or narrowed down the menu selections. We only have 3 months left!!!
    Michael, let the bride do it her way. Who cares if you spend an additional couple hundred bucks? Who cares if your wedding isn't as efficient or as perfect as it could be? It's a wedding, not a mortgage application.
    Do you want to pet my monkey?

  11. #11
    Cyburbian craines's avatar
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    Outwardly I give the appearance of a freeflowing in the moment sort of chap. Inwardly I tend to anaylze the hell out of everything and have fallback plans for everything.

    I think ones life needs to be anaylze, run through the mill and so forth but the understanding of the data anyalyzed needs to be taken with the proverbal grain of salt. Also somewhere along the line we all need to understand that we are going to die and to lighten up.

  12. #12
    Cyburbian Plus Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    I have "thrown caution to the winds" more than once when life's taken an unexpected turn; sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I can only say that I had a vague plan way back when. Thus far in my career it has pretty much panned out. That said.... because of changes in my personal life, my career is also changing. Unexpected, but I'll take the leap.

    I didn't expect to be a single mom, or to be moving again, or to have a tree fall on my house. I'm not much for self-reflection, and I don't really have a philosophy about all this. Right now I'm just focusing on getting from Point A to Point B and making some advantageous financial decisions as part of it. Oh, and then having a lot of fun.

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    Cyburbian natski's avatar
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    I like to plan how my conduct my life- yeah ok im only 24, not a lot of planning to be done i hear you say. It is true. But I have realised that planning things sometimes ruins the fun in life.

    On the other side of things, i see life from the perspective that i need to plan things out for myself, cause i have no one to rely on (i.e partner/bf) and in terms of wealth/career- its just me and only me.

    Anyway you cant always plan for everything- things happen that you cant plan for, so you have to be able to go with the flow and adapt to situations and get outside your comfort zone otherwise you just wont be happy. Im still trying to deal with that
    "Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?" Zoolander

  14. #14
    I analyze the heck out of everything, but I don't really do much once I analyze it.

  15. #15
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
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    This Bear follows the advice of Sgt. Shultz.....

    "I know nothing!"

    Because of that Hoganism my life has been a series of unplanned miscalculations.

    Bear
    Occupy Cyburbia!

  16. #16
    Cyburbian Plus Whose Yur Planner's avatar
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    I am one of the most planned out, analytical people on the planet. Given what I do, that's a good thing. Most PDs are. As for my personal life, I learned that all of this gets tossed when you have a family and find out that you can't plan for squat. One of the compromises the better half and I reached was that she is more organized and I've learned to go with the flow better. As we tell each other, we are a good balance for each other. I help keep her grounded and lightens me up.
    When did I go from Luke Skywalker to Obi-Wan Kenobi?

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    Cyburbian imaplanner's avatar
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    I am one of the worst I have ever met as far as planning my life and anything related to it. But I like to think I am pretty good at planning as a career.

  18. #18
    Cyburbian Greenescapist's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by SuperPenguin View post
    I analyze the heck out of everything, but I don't really do much once I analyze it.
    Same here... though I think a little planning goes a long way towards making fun weekends and vacactions. The key is to not overplan.

  19. #19
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by KSharpe View post
    Michael, let the bride do it her way. Who cares if you spend an additional couple hundred bucks? Who cares if your wedding isn't as efficient or as perfect as it could be? It's a wedding, not a mortgage application.
    We are not talking hundreds... and we both agreed that we will NOT take out a loan for our wedding.
    Not my monkey, not my circus. - Old Polish Proverb

  20. #20
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    I have goals and objectives and I have an implementation plan on how to achieve those goals and objectives. I even plan out my week in terms of what to cook for every meal. But, just like every Comp Plan should have a degree of flexibility, I'm flexible enough that I can go with the flow or react accordingly if something unexpected happens.

  21. #21
    Cyburbian GeogPlanner's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis View post
    We are not talking hundreds... and we both agreed that we will NOT take out a loan for our wedding.
    I'm a sympathizer. Save every penny you can! I do plan when it comes to this wedding for sure. I have certain goals, objectives and deadlines.

    I don't live like the work I am doing. I've been working on transit for our DOT for the past 4 months. I drive everywhere. My boss though takes the bus and rides his bike - a choice user of transit. That's probably why I'm leaving here after tomorrow...I don't live how I work. Back to downtown on Thursday...
    Information necessitating a change of design will be conveyed to the designer after and only after the design is complete. (Often called the 'Now They Tell Us' Law) - Fyfe's First Law of Revision

    We don't believe in planners and deciders making the decisions on behalf of Americans. -- George W. Bush , Scranton, PA -- 09/06/2000

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