Urban planning community

+ Reply to thread
Results 1 to 25 of 25

Thread: Can't help but ogle

  1. #1
    Cyburbian Joe Iliff's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 1997
    Location
    Clowns to the left, jokers to the right
    Posts
    1,438

    Can't help but ogle

    It appears that even in the presence of our significant others (SO), we can not help but notice some other attractive person.

    Honey, I was just looking! In defense of ogling [MSNBC]
    In a series of experiments on something called “attention adhesion,” a team of psychologists found that every one of the men and women in their study fixated on highly attractive people within the first half second of seeing them and had a harder time pulling their gaze away from good-looking folks than average joes. What’s more, women were just as likely to ogle hotties as men.

    “Our research suggests that it’s inevitable to a degree,” says Dr. Jon Maner, assistant professor of psychology at Florida State University and author of the study. “People’s eyes are automatically captured by attractive members of the opposite sex although our research also suggests that self-control can take over after that initial attentional bias.”
    Have we all ogled in the presence of our SO? Ever gotten in BIG trouble for it?
    Is it ok for someone in a relationship to ogle at another attractive person? Is it OK just for other people's SO, or for your SO, too?
    JOE ILIFF
    ________________________________________________________________________
    Debt is normal . . . Be weird!
    Dave Ramsey

    "Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think."
    Martin Luther King, Jr.

  2. #2
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    19,257
    Mrs. Maister has caught me on numerous occasions looking (in fact, if we're in the car together and a female jogger goes bouncing by she'll frequently look to see where my gaze goes), but has never called me on it. Phwew! I guess look but don't touch is the unspoken rule.

  3. #3
    Cyburbian mgk920's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Appleton, Wisconsin
    Posts
    4,191
    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    Mrs. Maister has caught me on numerous occasions looking (in fact, if we're in the car together and a female jogger goes bouncing by she'll frequently look to see where my gaze goes), but has never called me on it. Phwew! I guess look but don't touch is the unspoken rule.
    But I wonder if SHE knows that you are looking at where her gaze goes when that chick-magnet male jogger goes by, or when you drive past a busy construction site.



    Mike

  4. #4
    Cyburbian craines's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Los Angeles, California
    Posts
    578
    Thank god for sunglasses.............

  5. #5
    moderator in moderation Suburb Repairman's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2003
    Location
    at the neighboring pub
    Posts
    5,570
    There's a place in my fair city where, in nice weather, all of the hottie coeds go to sun-worship. Yeah, I get busted on a fairly routine basis, but my wife is a good sport about it and usually just makes fun of me for a while. Neither of us is prone to jealousy.

    Funny story... I caught my wife ogling the UPS guy at our house (cliche, I know). After he closed the door and headed down the stairs, I jokingly said rather loudly that I'd prefer she pay attention to the package she was receiving rather than the one leaving. It turns out the windows were open and the UPS guy heard me because I heard him chuckling outside.

    "Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."

    - Herman Göring at the Nuremburg trials (thoughts on democracy)

  6. #6
    Cyburbian the north omaha star's avatar
    Registered
    Nov 2003
    Location
    at Babies R Us or Home Depot
    Posts
    1,260
    Sometimes, I don't even bother to hide it. The worst instance was at an auto show in DC. My wife watched me ogle this pretty young thing from one end of showroom to the other. If you ever been in the new DC Convention Center, you know it's massive. So that was a lot of ogling.
    I am recognizing that the voice inside my head
    is urging me to be myself but never follow someone else
    Because opinions are like voices we all have a different kind". --Q-Tip

  7. #7
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Slightly Off-Center
    Posts
    8,261
    Mrs. ofos & I have reached consensus that men are visual and can't help looking, just don't stare. We just pretend that women don't do the same but it is funny that she knows who all the movie hunks are while I have trouble matching up names and well...faces or whatever.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  8. #8
    Cyburbian otterpop's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Down by Dun Ringill
    Posts
    6,352
    Blog entries
    6
    My saying is: "I am an easy dog to keep on the porch, but that doesn't stop me from watching the traffic."

    My wife is amused by my looking at other women. She comes from a culture where the men are much worse, so I am domesticated in comparison.

    Every weekday morning we drive past the local high school. On one particular morning a teenage girl jumped out of her car and ran across the street without looking. I brought the car to a sudden stop and watched as she cross the street in front of us. The girl had a very nice butt and blue jeans that really complimented that asset.

    As she got across the street, my wife said, "Keep your eyes on the road."

    "What," says I. "I just wanted to be sure she got across the street safely."
    "I am very good at reading women, but I get into trouble for using the Braille method."

    ~ Otterpop ~

  9. #9
    Cyburbian btrage's avatar
    Registered
    May 2005
    Location
    Metro Detroit
    Posts
    6,420
    There's a big difference between passively glancing at an attractive person, and out-right staring at them. Who wouldn't want to check out a nice piece of art.

    If my wife didn't occasionally check out an attractive guy, I'd wonder what was wrong with her.

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Tide's avatar
    Registered
    Oct 2005
    Location
    The Gig City
    Posts
    2,678
    As long as the tongue and eyes stay in the head the quick glance isn't noticed. I don't ogle long, but may go back for seconds when she takes a bite to eat or looks somewhere else.
    @GigCityPlanner

  11. #11
    Cyburbian Luca's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2005
    Location
    London, UK
    Posts
    1,147
    I'm allowed to look at the menu, so long as I always eat at home.
    Life and death of great pattern languages

  12. #12
    Cyburbian Duke Of Dystopia's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Cyburbias Brewpub, best seat in the haus!
    Posts
    2,677
    I don't even have to see the object my eyes would follow. In fact, I have even tried to avert my eyes and it dosn't work.

    One average looking female within spotting distance and I am in the doghouse, and I am not even married!

    This can suck a lot. Especially when her looking is NOT an issue.

    Oh well, she has other redeeming features so I can live with it.

    Believe me, I still find a way to see.
    I can't deliver UTOPIA, but I can create a HELL for you to LIVE in :)DoD:(

  13. #13
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2003
    Location
    De Noc
    Posts
    19,268
    Thank goodness I don't have a wife or SO to call me on such behavior.
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  14. #14
    Cyburbian natski's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2005
    Location
    In my own little bubble
    Posts
    2,564
    On the opposite hand, i wonder if guys actually think how great a chick feels when he decides to ogle her infront of his missus and the missus gives an evil eye to the chick.

    Its uncomfortable and embarrassing i can tell you- not a position thats nice to be in!
    "Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?" Zoolander

  15. #15
    Cyburbian Richmond Jake's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Jukin' City
    Posts
    16,942
    I'm a bit more discrete with my behavior due to recent events.
    Annoyingly insensitive

  16. #16
    Cyburbian otterpop's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Down by Dun Ringill
    Posts
    6,352
    Blog entries
    6
    For those of you ladies who think it is not hard not to ogle I offer this challenge: next time you are passing a shoe store, try not to look in the window.

    Difference is: you won't get in trouble for "trying them on."
    "I am very good at reading women, but I get into trouble for using the Braille method."

    ~ Otterpop ~

  17. #17
    Cyburbian Zoning Goddess's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 1999
    Location
    400 miles from Orlando
    Posts
    13,837
    Quote Originally posted by natski View post
    On the opposite hand, i wonder if guys actually think how great a chick feels when he decides to ogle her infront of his missus and the missus gives an evil eye to the chick.

    Its uncomfortable and embarrassing i can tell you- not a position thats nice to be in!
    You are so right. There is looking and then there is leering and commenting on chests and stuff. Yes, we all look. For most of us, that's it. Women, that is. I guess that's why you guys go to strip clubs... sigh

  18. #18
    Cyburbian imaplanner's avatar
    Registered
    May 2004
    Location
    Snarkville
    Posts
    6,593
    Quote Originally posted by otterpop View post
    For those of you ladies who think it is not hard not to ogle I offer this challenge: next time you are passing a shoe store, try not to look in the window.

    Difference is: you won't get in trouble for "trying them on."
    That is a good analogy.

  19. #19
    Ladies: What is the difference between ogling and leering? Does the latter involve frothing at the mouth, display of fangs and so forth? Curious minds want to know...
    Je suis Charlie

  20. #20
    Cyburbian mgk920's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Appleton, Wisconsin
    Posts
    4,191
    Au contraire, we don't 'ogle' - we 'admire'!



    Mike

  21. #21
    Super Moderator kjel's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Wishing I were in Asia somewhere!
    Posts
    10,186
    Blog entries
    5
    An old boyfriend of mine and I were walking downtown one day and obviously someone caught his attention, he was "admiring" and walked into a pole. I didn't say anything, but laughed pretty hard and he said he deserved what happened.
    "He defended the cause of the poor and needy, and so all went well. Is that not what it means to know me?" Jeremiah 22:16

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Queen B's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2003
    Location
    "Somewhere in the middle"
    Posts
    3,172
    My husband is miraculously good about not ogling or commenting. I would expect some but he just doesn't.

    However, before going to see Garth Brooks last week I had to just fess up and say that he is way easy on my eyes.

    However, I did draw the group at the bar the other night into an ogle. Driving by was a vehicle with Elk antlers on top and I said loudly, "Hey look at that rack!"

    They all turned to look.
    It is all a matter of perspective!!!

  23. #23
    Cyburbian Captain Worley's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Columbia, SC
    Posts
    275
    Quote Originally posted by otterpop View post
    Every weekday morning we drive past the local high school. On one particular morning a teenage girl jumped out of her car and ran across the street without looking. I brought the car to a sudden stop and watched as she cross the street in front of us. The girl had a very nice butt and blue jeans that really complimented that asset.

    As she got across the street, my wife said, "Keep your eyes on the road."

    "What," says I. "I just wanted to be sure she got across the street safely."
    In those situations, my wife likes to point out she's less than half my age.
    Navy collier
    USS Cyclops

  24. #24
    Cyburbian otterpop's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Down by Dun Ringill
    Posts
    6,352
    Blog entries
    6
    Quote Originally posted by Captain Worley View post
    In those situations, my wife likes to point out she's less than half my age.
    Mine too. But then I point out that I thought 15 year old girls were pretty when I was 16 and I still think they are pretty. My advancing years has only widened the age span of women I appreciate for their pulchritude.

    And I also know that when I was 15 years old girls of that age had no interest in me and they still don't. I think they are pretty. I will look at them. But no pretty young thing is worth the effort or risk. Or sharing a cell with some felon in Deer Lodge.
    "I am very good at reading women, but I get into trouble for using the Braille method."

    ~ Otterpop ~

  25. #25
    Cyburbian
    Registered
    Mar 2006
    Location
    athens, ga
    Posts
    146
    I'm *so* disappointed in everyone so far. This many posts, and I'm the first to say "TTIWWOP" - damn, ya'll.

    Yes, I look too. It's awful being a grad student here at UGA during sun-dress season. It's a wonder I don't walk into more stuff.

+ Reply to thread