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Thread: Stop Embarassing Yourselves! (aka Regional Pride)

  1. #1
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
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    Stop Embarassing Yourselves! (aka Regional Pride)

    They say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery and to some extent that may be true. For instance, it’s very cute when your three-year old pulls out the crayons and pretends to be an artist, creating a ‘portrait’ of mommy which is then proudly displayed on the fridge. As adults, though, our feeble attempts to mimic things beyond our understanding or skill is often laughable. Case in point, Brits serving popcorn at movie theaters that tastes like ‘albatross on a stick’ (thanks Tranplanner). The American continent is of course the birthplace of corn so it stands to reason we know how to do it right – so to our friends across the pond we implore you to stop embarrassing yourselves and leave the popcorn making to us!

    Oh, but this sort of thing cuts in every direction. I’m personally embarrassed on behalf of the entire country every time I see a Taco Bell commercial (I'll let Mskis present the Michigander's comparative view of pasties vs. the rest of the worlds' 'pot pies'). It’s much more fun, though, to make fun of everyone else and point out the Other Guys’ shortcomings - that’s what this thread is all about!

    Other examples…..

    Russians: you folks wrote the book on caviar and vodka and have demonstrated you know how to repel an invading power as good as anyone on earth…..but when you produce cars like the Zhiguli

    Do you have to use the word ‘car’ in the same sentence?

    Any other examples?
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  2. #2
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Holly Whah and Yea Eh! You’se guys know dat only dem yoopers can make dat dare good pasties... da way it’s meant to by yah know.

    In all seriousness, it is not just an outside of Michigan thing for pasties, it is out side the Upper Peninsula. A local grocery store has pasties in their lunch counter display right next to the BBQ ribs. I though, oh look a taste of home! It was a taste all right, but it was not of home. It was more like a hamburger flavored cardboard rollup. The best pasty that I have ever had is made by a little 90 year old woman from Ishpeming, whose husband worked in the iron mine for over 60 years.

    And as for the “pot pies” that is a whole other thing. It is like apples and tires, they both roll, but that is where the similarity stops. Harding’s Market and all the pasties makers outside of the Upper Peninsula quit embarrassing yourselves and leave it to a Yooper.

    One big one that I have also noticed is that of the cheese steak. Across the street is a place that even calls it’s self a cheese steak grill, but the left over gristle that they toss on some bread stuff is far from a real cheese steak. People need to leave that to Eastern PA and stop embarrassing them selves.

    The big one that I see too much is HOCKEY SOUTH OF THE MASON DIXON LINE! As I have said before, if you can not play the sport out doors, you should not be playing. You don’t see me in a Surf Tournament... because we don’t have waves that big here often enough for me to surf! Atlanta, Dallas, Florida, North Carolina, and the rest of the southern teams should pack up and move home... to the northern states and Canaukastan. So southern states, quit embarrassing your selves.
    Not my monkey, not my circus. - Old Polish Proverb

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    Cyburbian zman's avatar
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    One could say the same for skiing in the mountains of Michigan.
    Heck, one could say something for Michigander Skiers themselves.
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  4. #4
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by zmanPLAN View post
    One could say the same for skiing in the mountains of Michigan.
    Heck, one could say something for Michigander Skiers themselves.
    Off-topic:
    Pipe down pony boy or I will make you eat my p-tex
    Not my monkey, not my circus. - Old Polish Proverb

  5. #5
    Cyburbian otterpop's avatar
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    While many cheese companies in the U.S. make fine selections of cheeses. A special thanks to Wisconsin. Why in the hell do we produce a shiny, rubbery, largely tasteless orange sort-of cheese and call it "American" cheese?

    I hate to say it of my fellow countryman, but American cheese is an embarrassment, while at the same time representative of America.

    American cheese is a lot like Americans (citizens of the U.S.A). It is bland. It is designed to be mass produced with the aims of profit and marketability. American cheese exemplifies American's desire for quantity, not quality. It is meant to offend no one while at the same time serve the masses. American cheese is mediocre.

    Americans are very comfortable with mediocrity. Mass appeal in the media, food, housing, and even our politicians. Do we continue to construct lasting architecture and infrastructure? No. We accept the lowest bid and get our money's worth (if your goal is something that have a shelf life a little longer than American cheese.)

    Maybe we should rename it? How about "Freedom cheese?"
    "I am very good at reading women, but I get into trouble for using the Braille method."

    ~ Otterpop ~

  6. #6
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by zmanPLAN View post
    One could say the same for skiing in the mountains of Michigan.
    Heck, one could say something for Michigander Skiers themselves.
    Go ahead, insult Texians too. You know you want to do it and then you'll have insulted both my former and current states. BTW, Rocky Mountain oysters must have been a gourmet delight to a Colorado expat from the Bonner party.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

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    Cyburbian Bubba's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis View post
    The big one that I see too much is HOCKEY SOUTH OF THE MASON DIXON LINE! As I have said before, if you can not play the sport out doors, you should not be playing. You don’t see me in a Surf Tournament... because we don’t have waves that big here often enough for me to surf! Atlanta, Dallas, Florida, North Carolina, and the rest of the southern teams should pack up and move home... to the northern states and Canaukastan. So southern states, quit embarrassing your selves.
    Quit hating because the northern NHL teams suck - you know that no team north of the Mason Dixon Line is capable of winning the Stanley Cup in this day and age:

    LAST THREE STANLEY CUP WINNERS:

    2006-07 - Anaheim Ducks

    2005-06 - Carolina Hurricanes

    2003-04 - Tampa Bay Lightning


    Jest sayin'


    (can someone write up why Michigan and Notre Dame should quit playing football? I don't have the energy.)
    I found you a new motto from a sign hanging on their wall…"Drink coffee: do stupid things faster and with more energy"

  8. #8
    NIMBY asshatterer Plus Richmond Jake's avatar
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    You folks east of Washington, Oregon, and California: stop growing grapes and trying to make wine. You're embarrassing yourselves!!! I demand an apology.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    German Pizza. Hands down the worst I've ever eaten. Ranks right up there with Amerikanische Bier.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  10. #10
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis View post
    Off-topic:
    Pipe down pony boy or I will make you eat my p-tex
    Don't you have some unmowed grass to measure?

    Quote Originally posted by ofos View post
    Go ahead, insult Texians too. You know you want to do it and then you'll have insulted both my former and current states. BTW, Rocky Mountain oysters must have been a gourmet delight to a Colorado expat from the Bonner party.
    I have spewed plenty of Texas-sucks rhetoric on these forums, all you have to do is conduct a search.

    On the other hand, you Texans are welcome to ski Michigan anytime.
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  11. #11
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by zmanPLAN View post
    Don't you have some unmowed grass to measure?



    I have spewed plenty of Texas-sucks rhetoric on these forums, all you have to do is conduct a search.

    On the other hand, you Texans are welcome to ski Michigan anytime.
    Don’t you have a consultant to talk to? Something about a plat commitment...

    And yes, we welcome Texans to Michigan... We will take your oil money any day. Just remember, we play hockey better.
    Not my monkey, not my circus. - Old Polish Proverb

  12. #12
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by michaelskis View post
    And yes, we welcome Texans to Michigan... We will take your oil money any day. Just remember, we play hockey better.
    You need the oil money to put gas in your rusted Detroit hulks. It's the least that we can do. Can't give it all to Colorado and people like Zman.

    Oh, and you think that Michigan native Mike Modano will come back from Texas for the superior hockey when he retires?
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  13. #13
    Super Moderator luckless pedestrian's avatar
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    beep, beep

    New England clam or fish chowder made by people outside of New England - please, just stop it

  14. #14
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
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    Anyone else think that Yankee Cornbread should be outlawed?

    Sugar goes in your Sweet Tea and not in cornbread.

    Mama would be proud of that post...
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  15. #15
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by zmanPLAN View post
    Anyone else think that Yankee Cornbread should be outlawed?

    Sugar goes in your Sweet Tea and not in cornbread.

    Mama would be proud of that post...
    Damn Zman, we're in agreement on something. We both better RJ for the week.

    And a pox on Yankee chili and chicken fried steak served anywhere north of the Red River.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  16. #16
    New. York. Pizza.

    The rest is just lousy imitation. Okay, Chicago's a distant second. Far distant.

  17. #17
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by ofos View post
    Damn Zman, we're in agreement on something. We both better RJ for the week.

    And a pox on Yankee chili and chicken fried steak served anywhere north of the Red River.
    High five, Brother.

    I will RJ outta here in about 3 hours.
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  18. #18
    moderator in moderation Suburb Repairman's avatar
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    Yep. Native Texan.

    As far as I know, we are the only state that has a Bud Light "Real Men of Genius" advertisement about it.

    "Mr. Way to Proud of Texas Guy"

    The bad part is, it is at least 90% true. Texans generally annoy me, despite being born and raised here. I don't like trucks, country music, cowboy boots, driving, hot weather, Christian fundies, the Republican party, obcession with decorating everything with a Texas star, etc.

    If I wasn't so close with my family and my wife's folks, I would have left here long ago.

    "Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."

    - Herman Göring at the Nuremburg trials (thoughts on democracy)

  19. #19
    Cyburbian craines's avatar
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    New Yorkian Mexican food is poor.

  20. #20
    Cyburbian Captain Worley's avatar
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    Two things:

    1) You guys up north need to stop trying to make BBQ. No lie, WTH is the deal with ketchup BBQ. I don't even put that God forsaken substance on my french fries. And what is the deal with ketchup on hot dogs? Even Dirty Harry knows that's just plain wrong.

    2) You guys outrside of SC and NC need to just stop trying to get more horsepower out of an American motor than we do. There's a reason all the big race shops are in NC and SC and that's because we know how to make big, nasty, sweaty, tarmac ripping horsepower. You wouldn't believe how many daily drivers are running Nascar clocked parts down here. Pretty soon, we'll be whooping you with the Japanes motors, if not already. I know of one turbo propane powered DSM that is UNGODLY.
    Navy collier
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  21. #21
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
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    Off-topic:
    Regarding Northern BBQ: Don't laugh at me when I put slaw on my BBQ sandwich ever again...
    (sigh)
    I miss Memphis...
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  22. #22
    Cyburbian
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    *With few exceptions

    Southern pizza
    Northern grits

  23. #23
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Captain Worley View post
    2) You guys outrside of SC and NC need to just stop trying to get more horsepower out of an American motor than we do. There's a reason all the big race shops are in NC and SC and that's because we know how to make big, nasty, sweaty, tarmac ripping horsepower. You wouldn't believe how many daily drivers are running Nascar clocked parts down here. Pretty soon, we'll be whooping you with the Japanes motors, if not already. I know of one turbo propane powered DSM that is UNGODLY.
    Ummm... that is only NASCAR... and you can keep them.

    Up here, we are building street rods and muscle cars. There is a reason that it is called “Detroit Muscle” in the “Motor City”! On the street or on the Strip, your going down.

    And those California shops are a joke. They all want do the same thing... chop the top, put some dubs on with a fresh paint job, and install an air freshener. That is CA custom.
    Not my monkey, not my circus. - Old Polish Proverb

  24. #24
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Pralines. If they're not made in far E. Texas, Louisiana, or Southern Mississippi, they're not made right and probably not pronounced right.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  25. #25
    Cyburbian otterpop's avatar
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    Those folks living north of Alexandria, LA - just because you burned it and poured cayenne pepper on top of food doesn't make it "Cajun"!!

    Cajuns do not blacken food. Paul Prudhomme does that. Cayenne pepper is used sparingly in Louisiana cooking. The holy trinity of Cajun cuisine is onion, green pepper and celery. Learn to make a good dark roux.

    Good cajun food might make your eyes water but it won't burn your mouth.

    You want to cook Cajun, forget Paul Prudhomme. Think Justin Wilson.
    "I am very good at reading women, but I get into trouble for using the Braille method."

    ~ Otterpop ~

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