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Thread: Caption Contest - October 6, 2008 - with a twist

  1. #1
    Zoning Lord Richmond Jake's avatar
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    Caption Contest - October 6, 2008 - with a twist

    Describe how RJ damaged and injured his toe on Sunday afternoon.

    BTW, it's swollen a bit more since I took this picture last night.

    Last edited by Richmond Jake; 06 Oct 2008 at 9:17 PM. Reason: can't spell

  2. #2
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Dropkick Him, RJ, Through The Goalposts of Life

    I'm guessing that ZG came to you and said "RJ, the boy is driving me crazy" and then broke into song:


    Drop-kick Him, RJ, through the goalposts of life,
    End over end, neither left nor to right.
    Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
    Drop-kick Him, RJ, through the goalposts of life.

    Make him, Oh make him, RJ, more than a fan
    Make him a part of your master game plan
    Free of the earthly temptations below
    I've got the will, RJ, if you've got the toe.

    chorus:

    Bring on the brothers who've gone on before
    Bring on the sisters who've knocked on your door.
    Bring on those sainted Cyburbians of mine
    And put them up front in the offensive line.

    Loving spouse that you are, you did your best and that busted toe is all you've got to show for it. Is that close?
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Plus
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    His pool cleaner got mad at him & ran over his toe.

  4. #4
    Cyburbian Plus
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    (Edited in: RJ's Pool Cleaner)


  5. #5
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
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    Wasn't wearing slippers on the white tiled floor or was he ?
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  6. #6
    Cyburbian Planit's avatar
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    RJ uses his foot to break the fall of a bottle of a special 1995 Cabernet he had been saving to celebrate a raise (no matter how modest it was).
    "Whatever beer I'm drinking, is better than the one I'm not." DMLW
    "Budweiser sells a product they reflectively insist on calling beer." John Oliver

  7. #7
    moderator in moderation Suburb Repairman's avatar
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    ZG's foot fetish got XTREEM!!!!

    "Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."

    - Herman Göring at the Nuremburg trials (thoughts on democracy)

  8. #8
    Cyburbian Fat Cat's avatar
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    Fat Cat

    Kicked the living crap out of that cement block, showed it who was higher on the food chain

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
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    ZG will tell us what really happened ?
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Plus
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    What if RJ's putting us on- he just randomly stubbed his toe...


  11. #11
    Cyburbian Plus Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by JNA View post
    ZG will tell us what really happened ?
    We were tanning by the pool; Mr Nice Guy was going in and asked me if I needed anything, so I asked for a refill of my lemon water. He slammed his toe into a brick step. I feel bad. So I gave him a foot massage with lotion tonight.

  12. #12
    Zoning Lord Richmond Jake's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Zoning Goddess View post
    .....He slammed his toe into a brick step. .....
    She's a liar I tell you, a liar. It involved the Taliban, 10 or 12 of them, armed to the teeth, a home invasion, kidnapping attempt, probably ransom demands. Like a crazed animal, I fought them off, barehanded (well, there was a fingernail file). The only injury I sustained was when I kicked the last one of those bastards in the eye with my toe, off the beach and into the Gulf. Florida is safe from terrorists. They won't be back. Trust me.



    Or I could have stubbed my toe on the brick step. The afternoon is all real fuzzy to me.

    I'm telling you, it looks worse tonight. I won't post a pic. I'm thinking about lancing it.
    Last edited by Richmond Jake; 07 Oct 2008 at 10:50 PM.

  13. #13
    Cyburbian Veloise's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by RichmondJake View post
    ... I'm thinking about lancing it.
    I am not a doctor, but...if the blood has pooled up so that the skin is stretched too tight to be comfortable, go for it.

    (blister popper, here)

  14. #14
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Toe Foo

    Quote Originally posted by Zoning Goddess View post
    He slammed his toe into a brick step.
    Quote Originally posted by RichmondJake View post
    Or I could have stubbed my toe on the brick step.
    Quote Originally posted by Fat Cat View post
    Kicked the living crap out of that cement block, showed it who was higher on the food chain
    Looks like Fat Cat came the closest to the sad truth. What a disappointment! If he hadn't said that it happened on Sunday, I would have guessed that it was self-inflicted in his haste to RJ out of the office.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  15. #15
    Cyburbian Plus
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    Hey, ofos...

    Quote Originally posted by ofos View post
    Looks like Fat Cat came the closest to the sad truth
    Quote Originally posted by Seana View post
    ...he just randomly stubbed his toe...
    (I truly hope that you didn't subscribe to this thread- before I edited this post, it was so darned stupid...)
    Last edited by Shellac And Vinyl VelocitY; 08 Oct 2008 at 3:50 PM.

  16. #16
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Not a slight

    Quote Originally posted by Seana View post
    (What a pity that a chick has to quote herself as often as I do...)
    Like to give you props for the random stubbing but Fat Cat injected the masonry comment that propelled that entry to the top. Not that RJ wants me judging his contest anyway.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  17. #17
    Cyburbian Plus
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    Fat Cat said RJ did it on purpose with the cement block.

    I said stubbed, like an accident- just like RJ said stubbed later on, in an inebriated accident...

    Therefore, ofos, I must ask you to declare it a tie. Either that, or RJ needs to start a poll.


  18. #18
    Cyburbian Tom R's avatar
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    toe

    What about the foot massage with lotion?
    WALSTIB

  19. #19
    Cyburbian Plus Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Tom R View post
    What about the foot massage with lotion?
    You guys are pervs.

    Look at the picture. See how dry his foot is? (well, OK, maybe it's wrinkles...) I keep telling the man, I've put lotion on my legs and feet since I started shaving my legs 40 years ago and couldn't stand how dry they would feel otherwise.

    Speaking of lotion, it's a good thing I dusted our room today and hid all the "other" lotions and creams before my kid's half-sister visits this weekend, and I have to give her the house tour.

  20. #20
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Seana View post
    Fat Cat said RJ did it on purpose with the cement block.

    I said stubbed, like an accident- just like RJ said stubbed later on, in an inebriated accident...
    I can see that you might have inferred intent from FC's statement but using RJ to validate your stubbing premise...really. You'll have provide a more credible witness than a drunken sot. And you know that he and the lovely ZG (she of shaven, oiled, and bronzed limbs), are married so she can't witness on his behalf either.
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  21. #21
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
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    I still say he stubbed his toe on Teh White Tiled Floor.
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Plus Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by ofos View post
    I can see that you might have inferred intent from FC's statement but using RJ to validate your stubbing premise...really. You'll have provide a more credible witness than a drunken sot. And you know that he and the lovely ZG (she of shaven, oiled, and bronzed limbs), are married so she can't witness on his behalf either.
    You guys are still pervs. But hey, thanks for the limb comment.

    I think he lanced it; just came looking for antibiotic ointment. Ouch.

  23. #23
    Zoning Lord Richmond Jake's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Seana View post
    ....I said stubbed, like an accident- just like RJ said stubbed later on, in an inebriated accident... Either that, or RJ needs to start a poll...
    I was not inebriated and I don't do polls or political threads. Anyhoo, I declare you the winner as ofos is a doofus.

    Quote Originally posted by Zoning Goddess View post
    ...I think he lanced it; just came looking for antibiotic ointment. Ouch.
    I sure did. Wanna see a picture?

  24. #24
    Cyburbian The One's avatar
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    Ummm.....

    Obviously THOSE aren't RJ's toes......Those are ZG's TOES








    I win.....
    Skilled Adoxographer
    I have two emotions....Silence and Rage

  25. #25
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
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    Anybody see today's Garfield comic ? It was about what happened to RJ.
    http://www.arcamax.com/garfield
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

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