Urban planning community

+ Reply to thread
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 31

Thread: If Planning Went Cable

  1. #1
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    17,810

    If Planning Went Cable

    It seems just about every activity or interest known to humanity already has or is getting its own cable channel. There are channels devoted to fishing, golf, preschool, history, religion, health, money, you name it; it's high time planning gets its own cable channel too.

    What kind of programming might a cable planning channel feature - what would appeal to this narrow demographic slice (and probably put everyone else promptly to sleep)? What sort of sponsors/commercials might it feature? Here's your chance to help out.

    12:00 - 12:25 Skyscraper Show hosted by world reknown architect xxxxx who takes you this week on a guided tour of the Petronas Towers

    APA commercial followed by a Celexa ad

    12:30 - 1:25 The Test [instruction]This week's episode focuses on how to successfully study for the ethics portion of the AICP exam (show features several agonizing moments when a know-it-all but inarticulate student poses a terribly convoluted and confusing question about 'urban center malls' to the panel of experts during the Q & A segment)

    The same damned APA commercial as before followed by an engineering firm ad

    1:30 - 1:55 This Old Car [comedy] In this week's episode Zoning Administrator 'Chuck' gets into a dispute with mayor's grandson over the meaning of the word "operable" with regard to a 1965 Ford pickup on blocks in the side yard

    Cyburbia commercial, followed by an Excedrin ad

    2:00 - 2:25?
    People will miss that it once meant something to be Southern or Midwestern. It doesn't mean much now, except for the climate. The question, “Where are you from?” doesn't lead to anything odd or interesting. They live somewhere near a Gap store, and what else do you need to know? - Garrison Keillor

  2. #2
    Forums Administrator & Gallery Moderator NHPlanner's avatar
    Registered
    Apr 1996
    Location
    New Hampshire
    Posts
    7,584
    lol...maybe you could throw my monthly cable access show on there...

    I do a monthly show called "Agenda Item" which previews upcoming projects and issues before the Planning Board every month...been doing it for 5 months now, and I'm shocked every time someone tells me they've either seen it on TV or watched it online....
    "Growth is inevitable and desirable, but destruction of community character is not. The question is not whether your part of the world is going to change. The question is how." -- Edward T. McMahon, The Conservation Fund

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Seabishop's avatar
    Registered
    Nov 2002
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    3,662
    2:00 - 2:25 Those People How to retain your town's community character.

    2:30 - 2:55 Clusterf*&^ The Jim Howard Kunstler Roundtable

  4. #4
    Cyburbian Plus
    Registered
    Jun 2003
    Location
    De Noc
    Posts
    17,703
    Live broadcast of the Plan Commission.
    Live broadcast of BZA.
    (already showing on our fair city's pbs second channel)

    And rebroadcast saturday afternoon.
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  5. #5
    Super Moderator kjel's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Wishing I were in Asia somewhere!
    Posts
    9,686
    Blog entries
    5
    3:00 - 3:25 Acronym of the Day NIMBY, BANANA, LULU, etc.
    "He defended the cause of the poor and needy, and so all went well. Is that not what it means to know me?" Jeremiah 22:16

  6. #6
    Cyburbian beach_bum's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2007
    Location
    the old north state
    Posts
    2,701
    9:00-10:00 PM (Thursdays) P & Z- A one hour drama about the NYC Planning Department (Law & Order Style). Goes through planning, then the zoning compliance for city projects (and all the drama). An all star cast features the seasoned Planning Director, his top Senior Planner, the young new Planner, the Senior Zoning Compliance Officer & his partner Zoning Compliance Officer. Minor characters include the Planning Technician, various Council members and new developer each week.

    Memorable lines from the show include:

    "What about the pedestrians!?!" as the Senior Planner smacks a scale across the table at the developer of an apartment building

    "You call this a street tree? I'm going to have to get the plans out to check what was approved now" Zoning Compliance officer to Landscaper

    "What do you mean I have to bring this site into compliance? My family has owned this building for 50 years!" Guy who just took over his father's furniture business and tried to convert the site into a deli storms out of Department offices.
    Last edited by beach_bum; 09 Jul 2010 at 10:10 AM. Reason: thought of more stuff to add
    "Never invest in any idea you can't illustrate with a crayon." ~Peter Lynch

  7. #7
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    17,810
    6:00 - 6:25 (Sun) You Stupid Americans Host, Dieter, engages in a round table discussion with Pierre, Hans, and Guiseppe about the wasteful nature of the American public and reasons why Europeans recycle more often and have smaller landfills.


  8. #8
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 1996
    Location
    Upstate New York
    Posts
    14,548
    Blog entries
    3
    In ten years or so, there would be network decay. First, the shows about architecture and civil engineering would sneak in, along with some reality programming, like The Real Planners of Portland. Later on, the list shows would appear; Top 10 Limited Access Highways, Top 10 Transit Systems, and the like. Finally, we'd end up with dreck appealing to the lowest common denominator, like Detroit, Destiny and Nostradamus, When Citizens Attack and After Planning.

    The "good shows" would move over to a second network, The Planning Channel International, where there would be sensible BBC-produced documentaries about Curituba, bicycle use in Amsterdam, the gating of South Africa, and the like.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  9. #9
    Cyburbian Raf's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2007
    Location
    America's Happiest City
    Posts
    4,905
    It can have a sleazy show like "cheaters" called "developers". With hidden cameras of their shoddy work. People crying over faulty deals and then a "confrontation". The host could even get stabbed. Just sayin..
    Men do dumb $hit... it is what they do to correct the problem that counts.

  10. #10
    Cyburbian ofos's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Slightly Off-Center
    Posts
    8,258
    So You Think You Can Plan
    Celebrity Planners
    The Great Plan
    Planning With The Stars
    American Planners
    The Batchelor Planner
    The Batchelorette Planner
    Judge Planner
    Planning Court
    Oprah's Planning Book of the Month Club
    PlanFrancisco
    Hawaii 5.0.1 - "Book 'em Plano!"
    Keeping Up With the Plandashians
    Planning Survivors
    America's Next Top Planner
    Beauty and the Planner
    Dirty Planning Jobs
    Planning Mythbusters
    The Last Planner Standing
    HGTV Plan Stars
    etc., etc., ...
    “Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”

  11. #11
    Cyburbian TexanOkie's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Oklahoma City
    Posts
    2,904
    Quote Originally posted by Seabishop View post
    2:30 - 2:55 Clusterf*&^ The Jim Howard Kunstler Roundtable
    FTW.

    I bet he'd do it, too. But it might have to come on later at night, like Bill Maher's show, so he can cuss freely.

  12. #12
    Cyburbian Plus Salmissra's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    4,074
    3:30 - 4:30 Special Sign Advisory Committee meeting live!

    4:30 - 5:00 Sign inspectors - Watch Joe the Sign Inspector make his rounds
    "We do not need any other Tutankhamun's tomb with all its treasures. We need context. We need understanding. We need knowledge of historical events to tie them together. We don't know much. Of course we know a lot, but it is context that's missing, not treasures." - Werner Herzog, in Archaeology, March/April 2011

  13. #13
    Cyburbian Planit's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2005
    Location
    In a 480 square foot ex baseball nacho stand
    Posts
    7,032
    Oh the Things They'll Say 7-9 Mon & Thr

    Loosely based on the show "Dumb Crooks" this shows highlights commissioner, council, aldermen comments caught on video. Our elected officials are always making comments that often having no connection to the actually item that is being discussed, or make statements that are so far off-base, or actually are downright stupid. Yes folks, you elected these genius local officials.
    "Whatever beer I'm drinking, is better than the one I'm not." DMLW
    "Budweiser sells a product they reflectively insist on calling beer." John Oliver

  14. #14
    Cyburbian zman's avatar
    Registered
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    9,015
    Blog entries
    2
    How about a weekly "This Week at the ZBA" show that highlights ZBA cases from around the country. Expect expert analysis of the motions and decisions made, as well as the staff reports. Guest speakers from around the country can sit in a "living room" type stage set for the discussion.

    Should be Sunday morning, expected to give "Meet the Press" a run for its money.
    You get all squeezed up inside/Like the days were carved in stone/You get all wired up inside/And it's bad to be alone

    You can go out, you can take a ride/And when you get out on your own/You get all smoothed out inside/And it's good to be alone
    -Peart

  15. #15
    Super Moderator luckless pedestrian's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2005
    Location
    in a meeting
    Posts
    8,450
    my husband, a landscape architect, wants to have a show with a buddy of his entitled "this building sucks!" to rank on starchitects and other things while sitting in a barcalounger donning Patriot's clothing

    and all my meetings are on local cable so yeah I get stopped by tourists on hiking trails, stores and grocery stores saying they saw me on tv...

  16. #16
    Cyburbian imaplanner's avatar
    Registered
    May 2004
    Location
    Snarkville
    Posts
    6,587
    hmmmm. Am I the only one here that thnks planning is generally really boring? If I had to watch this stuff on TV I would hang myself.
    Children in the back seat can cause accidents - and vice versa.

  17. #17
    Cyburbian Duke Of Dystopia's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Cyburbias Brewpub, best seat in the haus!
    Posts
    2,669
    Quote Originally posted by imaplanner View post
    hmmmm. Am I the only one here that thnks planning is generally really boring? If I had to watch this stuff on TV I would hang myself.
    So we could do a show based on "How it works" called "CIVIL BUNKERS" and it would be on how civil servants at all levels manage workspace security and fortify their help desks!

    We could point out the flaws like:

    "Ima, they messed up BAD on this glass fortification! They didn't extend the partition all the way to the ceilling and left 18 inches of space from the partition to the ceilling."

    "DoD, how can that be a problem?"

    "Well Ima, this department only has one way in and one way out. Four jellied naphtha/Molotov cocktails thrown over the partition and specifically smashed in front of the door on the other side and the civil servants inside are TOAST!.... no pun intended."

    "DoD, that's tough. That will cost $250,000 to fix THAT screw up!"

    Ima says "Next week on Civil Bunkers we cover the Forestry Department Garage and how to lay 1,500 feet of razor wire per hour while turning your snow plows into unstoppable convoy escorts for the hated mayor of Brownfeild!"
    I can't deliver UTOPIA, but I can create a HELL for you to LIVE in :)DoD:(

  18. #18
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    17,810
    Quote Originally posted by Dan View post
    Finally, we'd end up with dreck appealing to the lowest common denominator, like Detroit, Destiny and Nostradamus, When Citizens Attack and After Planning.
    Maybe I shouldn't admit this....but I confess I'd be far more interested in watching these shows than any of the 'good' ones described.

  19. #19
    Cyburbian Raf's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2007
    Location
    America's Happiest City
    Posts
    4,905
    hmmm..

    How about a reality show called Densify my lot!

    Host (i.e. me) engage with people who have money and want to get the most bang for their buck. So i draw them pretty little pictures and provide photoshop before and after photos of how it would work, and make sure i use my "gay voice" to make it all designy and crap like that.

    Then we go after permits, hearing, and everybody cheers!

    After public hearing interview with couple or property owner

    Cut away to me putting the plans on a "dusty shelf"

    "see ya next time on densify my lot!"
    Men do dumb $hit... it is what they do to correct the problem that counts.

  20. #20
    "Beyond the Podium", narrated by Will Lyman (Frontline) takes a deeper look into the opposition of proposed development, from the eloquent and successful remonstrances, to the xenophobic and plainly NIMBY opponents. The hour long program premieres with an episode looking at the battle of a homeowner opposed to his neighbor's attempt to build an addition that will encroach 6" into a required 25' sideyard.
    Last edited by Gedunker; 09 Jul 2010 at 7:04 PM.

  21. #21
    Cyburbian Rygor's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Where the Wild Things Are
    Posts
    2,243
    Quote Originally posted by Dan View post
    In ten years or so, there would be network decay. First, the shows about architecture and civil engineering would sneak in, along with some reality programming, like The Real Planners of Portland. Later on, the list shows would appear; Top 10 Limited Access Highways, Top 10 Transit Systems, and the like. Finally, we'd end up with dreck appealing to the lowest common denominator, like Detroit, Destiny and Nostradamus, When Citizens Attack and After Planning.

    The "good shows" would move over to a second network, The Planning Channel International, where there would be sensible BBC-produced documentaries about Curituba, bicycle use in Amsterdam, the gating of South Africa, and the like.
    Ha ha. Definitely hit the nail on the head there. See: MTV, ESPN, Discovery Channel, TLC, etc. etc.
    "When life gives you lemons, just say 'No thanks'." - Henry Rollins

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Plus
    Registered
    Jun 2003
    Location
    De Noc
    Posts
    17,703
    Just like HGTV "Holmes on Homes" there could be

    Dan on Plans
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  23. #23
    Cyburbian rcgplanner's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Back in SE Texas
    Posts
    1,660
    Friday nights at 8/7 Central, Citizens Say the Darndest Things
    Get your weekly comedy fix as we show some of the craziest things residents say during public meetings or at the planning counter. Segments would also include "Biggest Lie of the Week","Most Offensive Letter to the Editor" and "Call the mental hospital, this person is bat s**t crazy!

  24. #24
    Cyburbian Plus Whose Yur Planner's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Dixie
    Posts
    5,842
    What about the late night planner pron?
    When did I go from Luke Skywalker to Obi-Wan Kenobi?

  25. #25
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
    Registered
    May 2003
    Location
    Northwestern Ohio
    Posts
    9,327

    More.....

    Not a planner but I can still throw in a few.....

    America's Funniest Planning Videos
    Every week planners from around North America submit their videos of zoning violations. One hilarious sequence involved a fellow from a small NW Ohio town who was told to remove his concrete pig from the side yard. **

    Truth Or Stansequences
    Hosted by blue shirt Stan, in this exciting game show the contestants have to correctly answer a planning-oriented question. Most participants purposely answer the question wrong which requires them to perform a zany stunt on stage. Stunts include "running for your life from the guy with the gun", "serving the supoena at gang headquarters", and "jump the counter to get the idiot". ***

    Guess The Original Facade
    One of the more popular network shows, the cameras visit different locales and present some of the more original (and disgusting) building facades, with a strong focus on "before and after". Best episode last season was when a poorly-installed facade fell off a building and broke an architect's arm, just as he was explaining to the show's cameras what he planned next. **

    World's Greatest Fake Cities
    Each episode looks at the works of some of the loonier folks in (and out) of the planning trade and explores fake cities that they created. These creative souls presented everything from auditorium-sized plat map mosaics to giant CBD's built with glue and toothpicks. ****

    Apartment Building Planning In Moscow
    This program only lasted for one episode. *

    Mister Bear's Neighborhood
    Great morning children's show, with wanna-be planner, Mr. Bear, opening each program with his trademark tunes and gentle comments.

    "Zoning ammendments, zoning ammendments.....will you be mine, will you be mine?"

    Regular visitors to his neighboorhood observe the cute trolley moving along the designated ROW, tiny plastic "city workers" taking a break next to the broken sidewalk, and the police stand-off at the planning offices. ***
    _____

    Bear
    Occupy Cyburbia!

+ Reply to thread
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast

More at Cyburbia

  1. The problem with cable news
    Friday Afternoon Club
    Replies: 11
    Last post: 21 Oct 2009, 11:26 AM
  2. Replies: 31
    Last post: 13 Mar 2009, 5:50 PM
  3. Cable stations we need/don't need
    Friday Afternoon Club
    Replies: 83
    Last post: 29 Jul 2006, 9:49 AM
  4. Choose the cable newsbabe!
    Friday Afternoon Club
    Replies: 39
    Last post: 11 Aug 2003, 7:24 PM
  5. Replies: 17
    Last post: 17 Jul 2003, 9:21 PM