I don't know jack about the pizza business, but I'm sure some of you have worked at pizza joints, and have baked pizzas, delivered pizzas, balanced the books and/or played zookeeper to a host of unruly adolescent/post-adolescent pizza parlor employees. You're going to tell the rest of us all about it.
The first thing I want to ask is - why is it restaurant pizza crust almost always has a better texture and taste than the stuff I make in my own oven. Granted, I usually go either the Chef Boyardee/Pilsbury/Jiffy mix pizza crust route, or perhaps buy one of those premade Boboli crusts and just pile the toppings on. I've tried cooking on a pizza stone and I've tried the perforated metal pizza pans but it just never seems to be quite as good - what do they do differently than we do at home?
Has anyone else ever heard the apocryphal tale that pizza places will hang up on you if you order toppings in this order: Onion, Ripe (black) olive, Green pepper, Anchovy, Sausage, Mushroom pizza (or something like that) because the topping short hand ordering system they use spells out 'ORGASM"?
I tipped a delivery driver handsomely a couple times (like I told him to keep the change for a 20 on an $11 order) and I swear every subsequent time I ordered pizza from that place it would arrive practically before I had a chance to sit back down, even if it was a different driver. Do drivers actually compare notes on tips at various addresses (I would think they'd want to keep that info to themselves)?
I see a 14" two item pizza goes for about $12 at a local middle of the road pizzeria. Forget overhead, labor, advertising, and all that other stuff. Just in terms of the product itself, how much does it cost them to make that pizza. And (I truly believe)a related question - how the hell is it those places that make crappy low quality pizza near every campus on earth manage to stay in business as long as they do?
What else can you tell us about the pizza biz? What's good and bad about it? Know any of the industry's deep dark secrets?