Urban planning community

+ Reply to thread
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 28

Thread: Wish I had a nickel

  1. #1
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    19,092

    Wish I had a nickel

    Wish I had a nickel for every time I heard someone with a code violation say "Who filed the complaint? What do you mean it's an ANONYMOUS complaint?!! The Constitution says I have the right to know who my accuser is!"

    or

    "I pay YOUR salary" (and therefore you must do as I bid)

    What do you wish you had a nickel for?

  2. #2
    OH....IO Hink's avatar
    Registered
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Hang on Sloopy...land
    Posts
    11,009
    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    "I pay YOUR salary" (and therefore you must do as I bid)
    This one always gets me. Well actually you probably pay a fraction of a percent of my salary, so please by all means treat me like sh!t.....

    ----------------------------
    If I had a nickel for every time a developer told me to trust him that something would be done the way we agreed to it.

    If I had a nickel for every time a developer requested "flexibility" then wouldn't allow us to have the same "flexibility" in our regulations.

    If I had a nickel for every time the Bengals and Reds lost.....
    A common mistake people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools. -Douglas Adams

  3. #3
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
    Registered
    Jun 2003
    Location
    De Noc
    Posts
    19,077
    Quote Originally posted by Hink_Planner View post
    If I had a nickel for every time a developer told me to trust him that something would be done the way we agreed to it.
    or to trust him it will be taken care of.
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  4. #4
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
    Registered
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Packing to move out of the icebox.
    Posts
    13,634
    I will get those revised plans to you right away....

    Oh yea, we will add those shrubs later....

    I will get to it as soon as I can afford it.....

    I did not know that we had to do that....

    Maister, I would love to respond, OK, you got me. The name and address of the person is Anon Y. Mous (he's from the Netherlands) who lives in the house at 123 Paved Road.
    "A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defense of custom. Time makes more converts than reason." - Thomas Paine Common Sense.

  5. #5
    Cyburbian
    Registered
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Western Pennsylvania
    Posts
    3,840
    "I love the environment, especially streams. I'm a fisherman and appreciate clean streams."

  6. #6
    Cyburbian beach_bum's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2007
    Location
    more West now
    Posts
    3,253
    Everytime the current owner of a for sale property, the potential owner, the real estate agent representing the owner and the real estate agent representing the potential owner call me with the same questions about using that property a different times.
    "Never invest in any idea you can't illustrate with a crayon." ~Peter Lynch

  7. #7
    Cyburbian ursus's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Northern Utah
    Posts
    4,224
    I wish I had a nickel for every time I've pretended to my angry wife that I can't call them because I'm in a "meeting" and must therefore continue texting only.

    If she ever read that I would be a dead, dead man. I also wish I had a nickel for every time someone asked me if anyone ever told me I looked like Chris Farley. I get it. I'm blonde, he's blonde. I'm fat, he's fat. It's hilarious. Ask me again.
    "...I would never try to tick Hink off. He kinda intimidates me. He's quite butch, you know." - Maister

  8. #8
    Cyburbian stroskey's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2008
    Location
    the delta
    Posts
    1,207
    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    Wish I had a nickel for every time I heard someone with a code violation say "Who filed the complaint? What do you mean it's an ANONYMOUS complaint?!!
    Get this! State law had a small change so our attorney wants to keep record of complainants should we have to go to court to prove the violations. And technically it would be a public record...
    I burned down the church to atone for my transgressions.

  9. #9
    Cyburbian craines's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Los Angeles, California
    Posts
    578
    Wish I had a nickel for everytime some one called me a prick!
    Looking for Sanity
    In this Crazy Land Of Ours

  10. #10
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
    Registered
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Middle of a Dusty Street
    Posts
    6,433
    I wish I had a nickle for ever Maister poll.

    I also wish I had a nickle every time someone calls me by the wrong first name because my last name is the same as a famous singer. I get it, it even starts with the same letter... at least it's an honest mistake.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  11. #11
    Cyburbian Richmond Jake's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Jukin' City
    Posts
    16,886
    Quote Originally posted by Mastiff View post
    I wish I had a nickle for ever Maister poll. .....
    I'd be wealthier if I had a nickle for every thread started by Maister.
    Annoyingly insensitive

  12. #12
    Cyburbian Zoning Goddess's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 1999
    Location
    400 miles from Orlando
    Posts
    13,837
    For every old fart in FL who came in to complain about something and said "Hey, I was on the Planning Board in Jersey! You can't pull anything over on me!"

    Wanna bet?

    Really, is every retiree in Fl a veteran of a Planning Board?

  13. #13
    Cyburbian btrage's avatar
    Registered
    May 2005
    Location
    Metro Detroit
    Posts
    6,420
    I'll trade you a pickle for a nickel...
    "I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany"

  14. #14
    Cyburbian ursus's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Northern Utah
    Posts
    4,224
    Quote Originally posted by btrage View post
    I'll trade you a pickle for a nickel...
    Do you like pickles?

    I think they stink!

    I love pickles!



    I wish I had a nickel for every subtle pop culture reference btrage has ever made. Hello early retirement.

    We gotta dollar, we gotta dollar. We gotta dollar hey hey hey hey hey!
    "...I would never try to tick Hink off. He kinda intimidates me. He's quite butch, you know." - Maister

  15. #15
    Cyburbian imaplanner's avatar
    Registered
    May 2004
    Location
    Snarkville
    Posts
    6,593
    Quote Originally posted by Mastiff View post

    I also wish I had a nickle every time someone calls me by the wrong first name because my last name is the same as a famous singer. I get it, it even starts with the same letter... at least it's an honest mistake.
    Are you Mike Bolton?
    Children in the back seat can cause accidents - and vice versa.

  16. #16
    Cyburbian Tarf's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Encinitas, CA
    Posts
    705
    This one I hear all the time, and never do I believe it:

    "We promise that we won't provide any new comments on stuff you've previously submitted and that we previously thoroughly reviewed and commented on."


    (Pffft... I'd be rich if I had them nickels...).



    Off-topic... should the whole concept of "if I had a nickel" be updated to the 21st century? I mean, really - who uses nickels anymore
    In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. (Douglas Adams)

  17. #17
    Cyburbian estromberg's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Northern Illinois
    Posts
    127
    Quote Originally posted by stroskey View post
    Get this! State law had a small change so our attorney wants to keep record of complainants should we have to go to court to prove the violations. And technically it would be a public record...
    It would be a public record, however the names and addresses would be redacted in a FOIA request. There was another thread on this recently, I personally feel that zoning departments should NOT take anonymous complaints.

    If I had a nickel for every time a neighbor came in to complain about their neighbor without ever even talking to them first.

  18. #18
    Cyburbian Queen B's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2003
    Location
    "Somewhere in the middle"
    Posts
    3,172
    I have talked to all the neighbors and NO ONE has ever seen it flood here.

    Yes I am putting up a small building but it is on skids and movable so I don't need a building permit for that.
    It is all a matter of perspective!!!

  19. #19
    Cyburbian Emeritus Bear Up North's avatar
    Registered
    May 2003
    Location
    Northwestern Ohio
    Posts
    9,327
    I wish I had a nickel.....

    For every time somebody said to me, "That's nothing! Why, one time I was _____."
    For every e-mail I get that attacks Obama and when checked by Snopes is so freaking false.
    For every time the stoopid Yankees played in the World Series.
    For every time Wolverine haters bring up the Ap State game.
    For every time Buckeye fans say, "They all do it."
    For every time that Freebird is played on the radio. ( I like it!) ("Hey, do Freebird!")
    For every time that Swanton High loses a football game. The Bulldogs lost last night, 83-6.
    For every time my dawg Molly licks me.

    Bear
    Occupy Cyburbia!

  20. #20
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
    Registered
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Middle of a Dusty Street
    Posts
    6,433
    Quote Originally posted by imaplanner View post
    Are you Mike Bolton?
    Mmmm... Nope. Not today.
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  21. #21
    Cyburbian WSU MUP Student's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Lowering the PCI in the Hills
    Posts
    6,137
    When feeding my daughter Cheerios I tell her she owes me a nickle for every one she throws on the floor and that one day I'm taking it out of her piggy bank and I proceed to count by fives as I pick them up.
    "Where free unions and collective bargaining are forbidden, freedom is lost." - 1980 Republican presidential candidate Ronald Reagan

  22. #22
    Chairman of the bored Maister's avatar
    Registered
    Feb 2004
    Location
    on my 15 minute break
    Posts
    19,092
    Wish I had a nickel for every time I heard someone involved in a longstanding property line dispute with their neighbor say "The city issued a permit for the [fill in structure] at my neighbor's property. It doesn't meet the setbacks. The city should [A] pay to have a survey of my property line", or [B] "make that worthless no-good neighbor pay for a boundary survey."

  23. #23
    Cyburbian michaelskis's avatar
    Registered
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Packing to move out of the icebox.
    Posts
    13,634
    Quote Originally posted by Maister View post
    Wish I had a nickel for every time I heard someone involved in a longstanding property line dispute with their neighbor say "The city issued a permit for the [fill in structure] at my neighbor's property. It doesn't meet the setbacks. The city should [A] pay to have a survey of my property line", or [B] "make that worthless no-good neighbor pay for a boundary survey."
    Or...
    (Name person who does not work there anymore) said I could build it there.
    "A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defense of custom. Time makes more converts than reason." - Thomas Paine Common Sense.

  24. #24
    Cyburbian Otis's avatar
    Registered
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Upper left edge
    Posts
    4,287
    For every time a builder says "They don't make me do that in [insert name of some other city or county]" or "This is the only city that makes me do that." Hey, Jack, we talk to each other. They do make you do that.

    Or trying to convince your GC that works in multiple cities how a particular process works in the city you are currently in. I had two weeks of "I told you so" surrounding the application process for water and sewer.
    Last edited by kjel; 19 Sep 2011 at 2:27 PM.

  25. #25
    Cyburbian btrage's avatar
    Registered
    May 2005
    Location
    Metro Detroit
    Posts
    6,420
    ....for every time I've bit my tongue instead of telling my wife what I really think. This alone should get me into the mythical "heaven".
    "I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany"

+ Reply to thread
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast