Originally posted by Maister
"I enjoy government functions like I enjoy getting kicked in the nuggets with a steel toed boot. But this hotel always served bacon wrapped shrimp. That's my number one favorite food wrapped around my number three favorite food. I'd go to a banquet in honor of those Somali pirates if they served bacon wrapped shrimp."
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. (Douglas Adams)
Isn't a random one of those things you carry around in your wallet in case you get lucky?
“Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”
ZG gave me a web-cam for Christmas. Here it is, nearing the middle of January and I still have been able to get the damn thing to operate.
Not that I have anybody to call with the web-cam.
A nuisance may be merely a right thing in the wrong place — like a pig in the parlor instead of the barnyard.
Um, RJ, it is working. Do you always "dress" like that when you're at the computer? Oh, nice legs, too.ZG gave me a web-cam for Christmas. Here it is, nearing the middle of January and I still have been able to get the damn thing to operate.
Not that I have anybody to call with the web-cam.
Is it just me or have car interiors become incredibly dull over the last decade? Check out this picture of a 1941 Chrysler Highlander. Plaid Interiors. Now that had class.
Why can't you sniff up an entire scent? I mean it's just little scent particles, right? Can't you "vacuum" them all up with your nose?
I burned down the church to atone for my transgressions.
IT PUTS THE LOTION IN THE BASKET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Carry on.
There is something wrong with the underlying premise of a dude ranch.
It’s really only slightly less laughable than the underlying premise of a ren faire. Both make a mockery of their respective life-ways, but at least folks from the Renaissance aren’t around to witness/endure it. People that work in the ranching industry must get a contemptuous, eye-rolling charge out of watching a bunch of citified greenhorns who know next to nothing about horses fumbling around and making fools of themselves as they pretend to be ‘cowboys’ for a week or two.
Why don't they have Planner Camps where tourists get to experience what it's like to be a planner for a week? Who wants to help me host? Day one we could hold (mock) public hearings. The 'audience' of course, is comprised of professional actors who portray various roles including the obligatory 'think of the children', 'I'm a COLLEGE PROFESSOR so listen to me talk now', and 'slimy developer' characters.
Last edited by Maister; 13 Jan 2012 at 10:32 AM.
It's Friday the 13th!
There, that needed to be said.
"Whatever beer I'm drinking, is better than the one I'm not." DMLW
There are going to be 3 Friday the 13th within 3 months I guess... something that doesn't happen very often.... the end is coming...
A common mistake people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools. -Douglas Adams
As it's now officially snowy-winter now, I think you mean waiting around for the phone to ring while filing old permits that your intern forgot to do.
I burned down the church to atone for my transgressions.
Day two of 'planner camp' will feature front counter duty, and campers will be required to complete mountains of clerical work, while frequently interrupted/accosted by 'citizens' with various problems and issues.
Blah.
((((hug))))
Thanks!
Last edited by dandy_warhol; 13 Jan 2012 at 1:22 PM. Reason: self-censoring
My favorite line from the movie Stripes was when the Army recruiter asked the question "(Recruiter) Have you ever been convicted of a felony or a misdemeanor? That's robbery, rape, car theft, that sort of thing. (Winger) Convicted? No."
Reminded me of the Alice's Restaurant Lyric's
when I finally came to the see the last man, I walked in, walked in sat down after a whole big thing there, and I walked up and said,
"What do you want?"
He said,
"Kid, we only got one question. Have you ever been arrested?"
And I proceeded to tell him the story of the Alice's Restaurant Massacre, with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff like that and all the phenome... - and he stopped me right there and said,
"Kid, did you ever go to court?"
And I proceeded to tell him the story of the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on the back of each one, and he stopped me right there and said,
"Kid, I want you to go and sit down on that bench that says Group W
Oddball
Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
From Kelly's Heroes (1970)
Are you sure you're not hurt ?
No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
Broke parts take a little longer, though.
From Electric Horseman (1979)
ArcGIS ate my baby!
Occupy Your Brain!
Better than a dingo I suppose.
"I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany"
the group story thing is fun, but at the same time it comes off sounding just like the sort of stream of consciousness stuff schizophrenics write. Seriously.
In Montana there are dude cattle drives and dude wagon trains. Just like in "City Slickers."The cattle drives are popular. The cows are not particularly ornery and really the cowboys and the cattle dogs pretty much keep the herd in line. So for the "dudes" it is mostly riding along, and eating chuckwagon cuisine. And at the end of the trail, the dudes get on a bus and the cows get into cattle trailers and make the trip back to the ranch. The dude wagon trains are slower and less romantic.
Of course I have lost count of how many times I've been heading somewhere and found cowboys driving the "dogies" to or back from summer pasture. We are a range law state, so cows have the right-of-way. You just sit and wait until the coast is clear and you can go on. I don't mind. It is a diversion. I like when the cowboys or cowgirls are riding horses. It is not quite the same when they are on four-wheelers and wearing feed caps instead of Stetsons.
"I am very good at reading women, but I get into trouble for using the Braille method."
~ Otterpop ~
Wow, that's high praise. Maybe we should consider publishing it.
“Death comes when memories of the past exceed the vision for the future.”
BUN & Maister should take our writings and stitch them together with litery prose to make it more coherent. It could be the next 'Twilight' type phenomenon.....
"Whatever beer I'm drinking, is better than the one I'm not." DMLW
