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Thread: Would you live here?

  1. #1
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Would you live here?

    This could be an extension of the Juvenile Thread; I'll ask the mods to move it there if they feel it's appropriate.

    Anyhow, this subdivision landed on the desk of one of the other planners at work. How would you present this on an overhead screen to the Planning Commission, at a meeting that will be aired on local cable TV?
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  2. #2
    Cyburbian Plus PlannerGirl's avatar
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    eeek!

    there is no way i could present on that one without laughing
    "They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety." Ben Franklin

    Remember this motto to live by: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO- HOO what a ride!'"

  3. #3
    Forums Administrator & Gallery Moderator NHPlanner's avatar
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    There's no way I could present that on TV....without losing it!
    "Growth is inevitable and desirable, but destruction of community character is not. The question is not whether your part of the world is going to change. The question is how." -- Edward T. McMahon, The Conservation Fund

  4. #4
    Cyburbian El Feo's avatar
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    The opening line of my presentation would be something like, "Sigmund Freud once said 'Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar'."

  5. #5
    Cyburbian Wannaplan?'s avatar
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    Perhaps it would be more satisfying in this position:

  6. #6
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    The STAFF Report! *giggles*

    1. The design follows the "lay" of the land.

    2. It preserves "natural features".

    3. Storwater emissions are channeled from...

  7. #7
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Re: The STAFF Report! *giggles*

    Originally posted by bturk
    3. Storwater emissions are channeled from...
    4. The townhouses the applicant is proposing to ... erect ... will range from ....

    5. Utilities will require a water line extension with an eight inch pipe ...
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  8. #8
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
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    Do you have a magic marker?

    A little "detention basin" with some "vegetative screening" would send that meeting into pandemonium...
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
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    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
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  9. #9
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    If you can get "turgid" into that report, you'll be my hero.

  10. #10
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    Based on the existing and proposed contours, it appears that some filling will be required.

    Will it be necessary to rezone this subdivision to a PUD?

  11. #11
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    Yes, this might be a hard one to present. I wonder if the developer realized the problem when he laid it out. Staff may rise to the challenge, but what about your plan commission. Hopefully they have been exposed to this sort of thing in the past. Still, they may find it difficult to swallow.

  12. #12
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    Originally posted by Michael Stumpf
    Yes, this might be a hard one to present. I wonder if the developer realized the problem when he laid it out. Staff may rise to the challenge, but what about your plan commission. Hopefully they have been exposed to this sort of thing in the past. Still, they may find it difficult to swallow.
    OMG. I'm in tears. Thanks Mike.

  13. #13
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Originally posted by Michael Stumpf
    Still, they may find it difficult to swallow.
    Post of the week. Don't even try to top this, folks.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  14. #14
    Cyburbian Planderella's avatar
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    I guess I won't even mention the cum...er...I mean cul-de-sac design.
    "A witty woman is a treasure, a witty beauty is a power!"

  15. #15
    Cyburbian Plus Zoning Goddess's avatar
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    Would I live here? It depends. Are they building any condom-iniums?

  16. #16
    Cyburbian prudence's avatar
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    Originally posted by Michael Stumpf
    Still, they may find it difficult to swallow.

    Mike,

    I think once they get their hands on it, grapple with it for a while, and really look it in the eye they'll realize it's the same as all the others they've wrestled with in the past.

    Just my $0.02.
    "Dear Prudence...won't you open up your eyes? "

  17. #17
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Originally posted by prudence
    I think once they get their hands on it, grapple with it for a while, and really look it in the eye they'll realize it's the same as all the others they've wrestled with in the past.
    We're still hung on some issues related to rear entry garages.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  18. #18
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    The folks in my office building are wondering why I am laughing so much. Great topic, Dan.

  19. #19
    That design flies in the the face of good planning!
    "I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

    - Homer Simpson

  20. #20
    Cyburbian biscuit's avatar
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    It's obvious that someone is not standing-up-straight with this development. No matter if the Planning commission hangs to the left or to the right with their ruling, they would recieve the most satisfaction from just sitting on this for awhile before deciding if they can wrestle with such rigid guidelines. Although, they will most likely just jerk-around with the developer.
    Last edited by biscuit; 26 Feb 2003 at 11:15 AM.

  21. #21
    Cyburbian prudence's avatar
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    I am in f***in' tears this morning. Dan, well done.
    "Dear Prudence...won't you open up your eyes? "

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    The developer obviously has no balls.

  23. #23
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
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    You say the scale is 1" = 100'? Who the hell are YOU trying to fool?
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  24. #24
    Cyburbian biscuit's avatar
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    Advertisment for development:

    Get a piece of the American dream. You'll be pleasently suprised at all the luxary features we've slammed in our small-package apts. So stop in and visit, you'll be glad you came.

  25. #25
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    Advertising Continued:

    Our utilities use the finest Swedish Pumps available.

    Our house lot package will surprise you with its comfort and affordability.

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