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Thread: Would you live here?

  1. #26
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
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    Middle of a Dusty Street
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    6,415
    More advertising:

    - Right of the main road and easy to find! It's not hard at all!

    - Very small and private!

    - Owner has held onto this for years before offering it to you!

    - No homeowner association! You don't have to be a member!

    - Very affordable! With all utilities in, you won't have to blow a wad! It's already done!
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  2. #27
    Our homes feature natural hardwood

    Home values are on the rise in this neighborhood

    Our sales people won't jerk you around!
    "I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

    - Homer Simpson

  3. #28
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2001
    Location
    The Cheese State
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    10,019
    Models now showing!
    Visit our customer contact center
    You'll be glad you came

  4. #29
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
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    Oct 2001
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    Middle of a Dusty Street
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    The pipe has already been laid!
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  5. #30
    Cyburbian Habanero's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 2001
    Location
    Texas
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    2,662
    My sides hurt, thanks Dan, and all who have come up with the funniest things I've read in a long time-

    When Jesus said "love your enemies", he probably didn't mean kill them.

  6. #31
    Cyburbian Planderella's avatar
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    Dec 1998
    Location
    NOLA
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    4,468
    Well landscaped entrance....neatly trimmed bushes....
    "A witty woman is a treasure, a witty beauty is a power!"

  7. #32
    Cyburbian biscuit's avatar
    Registered
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Paris of Appalachia
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    3,902
    Enjoy the pleasures of living at the head of our sac.

  8. #33
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    Aug 2001
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    South Milwaukee
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    Complete turnkey packages available - the carpet matches the drapes.

  9. #34
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    Like many projects, the rate of sales is expected to be slow near the beginning of the road, but the pace will rapidly quicken as it approaches its climax.

  10. #35
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    Aug 2001
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    South Milwaukee
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    We've wrapped this rascal is protective erosion control fencing for your safety.

  11. #36
    Cyburbian Seabishop's avatar
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    Nov 2002
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    USA
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    3,713
    Dan, to prevent an hour of giggling at the meeting say up front -"Ladies and gentlemen of the Commission, applicants, and viewers at home . . . lets take a minute to laugh at the fact that this proposed development looks like a penis. . . ok, now on to the proposed drainage. . ."

    You could also just deny the application based on obscenity laws.

  12. #37
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
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    Restrictive covenants:

    - No kittens
    - No back door entries allowed
    - No children playing with balls in the street
    - No unsanitary discharge
    - Roofs must be guttered to alleviate excessive dripping
    - Each owner must be mindful of his own gutter
    - Noice must cease at the stroke of midnight
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  13. #38
    Cyburbian Planderella's avatar
    Registered
    Dec 1998
    Location
    NOLA
    Posts
    4,468
    Originally posted by Mastiff
    Restrictive covenants:

    - No kittens
    - No back door entries allowed
    - No children playing with balls in the street
    - No unsanitary discharge
    - Roofs must be guttered to alleviate excessive dripping
    - Each owner must be mindful of his own gutter
    - Noice must cease at the stroke of midnight
    Now THAT'S funny!!
    "A witty woman is a treasure, a witty beauty is a power!"

  14. #39
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
    Registered
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Middle of a Dusty Street
    Posts
    6,415
    First major complaint:

    My neighbor is an asshole!
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  15. #40
    Cyburbian Cardinal's avatar
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    Aug 2001
    Location
    The Cheese State
    Posts
    10,019
    I think the Throbbing Brain of Cyburbia (tm) has come up with a new designee as "Cyburbia's Funniest Thread."

  16. #41
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    Aug 2001
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    South Milwaukee
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    Originally posted by Mastiff
    First major complaint:

    My neighbor is an asshole!
    And the second -

    My neighbors are nuts!

  17. #42
    Cyburbian nerudite's avatar
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    Aug 2001
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    Edmonton
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    5,503
    Don't forget Cyburbia's favorite subdivision sign...


  18. #43
    Cyburbian Planderella's avatar
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    Dec 1998
    Location
    NOLA
    Posts
    4,468
    The Neighborhood Association president is a prick.
    "A witty woman is a treasure, a witty beauty is a power!"

  19. #44
    Gunfighter Mastiff's avatar
    Registered
    Oct 2001
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    Middle of a Dusty Street
    Posts
    6,415
    Next complaint:

    Those suckers down at the end of the block are making things hard around here! I think this is going to turn into a real sticky situation...
    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    C'mon and get me you twist of fate
    I'm standing right here Mr. Destiny
    If you want to talk well then I'll relate
    If you don't so what cause you don't scare me

  20. #45
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
    Registered
    Aug 2001
    Location
    South Milwaukee
    Posts
    8,935
    Originally posted by Planderella
    The Neighborhood Association president is a prick.
    Thats a phallacy.

  21. #46
    Cyburbian Wannaplan?'s avatar
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    Aug 2001
    Location
    Gale Crater
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    2,866
    The developer sure has some spunk!

  22. #47
    Cyburbian Habanero's avatar
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    Dec 2001
    Location
    Texas
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    I think they should sack the developer-
    When Jesus said "love your enemies", he probably didn't mean kill them.

  23. #48
    Cyburbian Habanero's avatar
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    Dec 2001
    Location
    Texas
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    2,662
    Originally posted by bturk
    If you can get "turgid" into that report, you'll be my hero.
    I tried to work it in, but it just wouldn't fit.
    When Jesus said "love your enemies", he probably didn't mean kill them.

  24. #49
    Cyburbian nerudite's avatar
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    Aug 2001
    Location
    Edmonton
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    5,503
    Originally posted by TexasPlanner


    I tried to work it in, but it just wouldn't fit.
    You can always propose design regulations to avoid turgid s.f. home designs, such asMcMansions.

  25. #50
    Cyburbian Wannaplan?'s avatar
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    Aug 2001
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    Gale Crater
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    2,866
    The developer avoided all wet spots.

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