First of all, I would like to apologize to Zoning Goddess, who certainly does not deserve to bear the brunt of my irritation. My sincerest apologies. I know that is not enough and can never be enough. For that -- and more -- I am genuinely sorry.
Second, I would like to publicly thank REM – who isn’t American and doesn’t buy into that crap and who knows that IQ is not incredibly important and certainly it is no justification for treating anyone with such contempt. REM – who claims he isn’t that quick – the one person here who had enough smarts about things that matter to deftly change the subject and give ZG a warm-fuzzy without using his valiant rescue of the fair maiden as an excuse to turn around and abuse me and claim I deserved it because of my contemptuous behavior. Unlike most of us Americans, he understands things like: looking to justify that and looking for who started the war, etc, is a vicious circle and we all lose. He understands that if we do not all try to treat each other with respect simply for being human, it is an uncivilized environment. Any justification of mistreating others starts down that slippery slope that El Guapo was lamenting recently: when do “they” get redefined to include “us”?
In another thread, I mentioned that I walked away from a scholarship to try to figure out what more there might be to me than Just a Brain. Perhaps I didn’t spell that out clearly:
I so dislike this ugly game of “I am smarter than you and that justifies me acting like an ass and labeling it Virtue” that I gave up a National Merit Scholarship and dropped out of college and consciously walked away from all my academic awards, where most of my self-esteem had been vested. I was so clear that I did not wish to live that way anymore that I did so knowing full well that this meant I was facing a minimum of 10 years of disorientation, during which time I would appear to the entire world like a Loser.
My brilliant predictions of that outcome were absolutely right. I still look like a Loser to a lot of people: Just a Homemaker. Still do not have my bachelor’s degree. No job or income of my own. Any experience I do have – doing volunteer work, homeschooling my kids and so on – is routinely dismissed by most of America (not just in this forum – it is pretty rampant) as not having any value or credibility because there was no paycheck attached to it to readily identify how impressed people should be as indicated by the size of the dollar number next to my name on said paycheck.
Some folks like to play the game of “I am smarter than you and that justifies me acting like a jerk and treating you with contempt – supposedly for your stupidity because I am not honest enough to admit that I simply loathe most people” (Clearly, Budgie, DoD, and a few others who openly admit they are bitter and contemptuous are exempt from this, and I respect their honesty – it is kinder than trying to claim virtue when abusing others and it hurts less. I suppose that is why they are so endearing, in a weird sort of way.) If you want to run that game on me, you are highly likely to lose. I play that game extremely well. And I really don’t enjoy it. My multicultural background and diverse group of friends have taught me to value other things – like people.
Anyway, I would like to propose that we generally quit playing “I am so much smarter than you and that makes it okay to be ugly”. I suggest that we start playing a New Game in Cyburbia. Something less cruel. Something that won’t leave me wondering at the value of my Pyric Victory, where I sit around trying to measure the value of winning the battle against what it cost in terms of human dignity, pain, loss of community, and so on. You can pick the game. I have no egomaniacal need to Make The Rules. I just would like to step off this nasty little merry-go-round without having to simply leave Cyburbia, which has a lot to offer.
Any suggestions as to what you might like to play today?