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Thread: Bad Example of Subdivision Grading

  1. #1
    maudit anglais
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    Bad Example of Subdivision Grading

    A friend (and soon to be member I hope) passed these pics along to me - he has no idea when and where they were taken. Definitely North American though. I can only hope they don't get any snow...



  2. #2
    Cyburbian Rumpy Tunanator's avatar
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    Wow that is pretty bad. You'd need a monster truck to drive up some of those, do to the slope degree. I think a car might get stuck. Whose the idiot that planned this development (and might as well throw in the buyer)?
    A guy once told me, "Do not have any attachments, do not have anything in your life you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you spot the heat around the corner."


    Neil McCauley (Robert DeNiro): Heat 1995

  3. #3
    Cyburbian SGB's avatar
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    Let me guess....

    That unit is probably the one with the handicapped accessible interior design, right?

    All these years the people said he’s actin’ like a kid.
    He did not know he could not fly, so he did.
    - - Guy Clark, "The Cape"

  4. #4
    Cyburbian jordanb's avatar
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    They're probably trying to get "that San Francisco look."

  5. #5
    Cyburbian donk's avatar
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    I got a copy of these from a friend.

    Must be in Southern Ontario someplace.
    Too lazy to beat myself up for being to lazy to beat myself up for being too lazy to... well you get the point....

  6. #6
    maudit anglais
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    Originally posted by donk
    I got a copy of these from a friend.

    Must be in Southern Ontario someplace.
    I'm thinking so too...the landscape looks eerily familiar. According to the person who passed the pics on to me, the soil colour is characteristic of the Hamilton/Burlington area. I didn't know Jeff did work on this side of the border

  7. #7
    Cyburbian SGB's avatar
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    Originally posted by donk
    Must be in Southern Ontario someplace.
    Oh, then that must be the built in bunny ski/boarding slope. The tow rope is to be installed shortly....
    All these years the people said he’s actin’ like a kid.
    He did not know he could not fly, so he did.
    - - Guy Clark, "The Cape"

  8. #8
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Ho ... ly ... sheet. Those driveways are useless for any vehicle with a clearance less than a Hummer. How did they pour and finish the slabs?

    My guess, looking at the vegetation, soil, topography and architecture, is suburban Atlanta.

    I don't think it's Southern Ontario. The density looks too low, the soils don't look right (too red), the architecture is a bit off (no quoins), and no builder in their right mind would build such a grade, knowing that buyers know the driveway would be useless during the winter. Can't plow or shovel it, much less drive up it when it's coated in snow or ice.

    I did lot grading inspections as part of my role as planning director for an Orlando suburb. I enforced a curve requirement, to ensure that vehicles could actually park in the driveway, and that car bottoms wouldn't scrape the driveway. We made a few builders tear out driveways after they mistakenly poured before getting the base grade inspected. The finshed driveways were too steep, so in went the jackhammers.

    Here's a brochure I wrote; look at page 7.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  9. #9
    Cyburbian ludes98's avatar
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    Can't believe someone designed and then actually built those launch ramps!

  10. #10
    Cyburbian
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    I guess the developer must ride the short bus....
    With that slope it's far more bright to make an underground garage that's at the same level than the street...

  11. #11
    Cyburbian Plus JNA's avatar
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    That was too funny
    had to share it with others in my office
    who were then LOL!
    Oddball
    Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves?
    Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here?
    Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
    From Kelly's Heroes (1970)


    Are you sure you're not hurt ?
    No. Just some parts wake up faster than others.
    Broke parts take a little longer, though.
    From Electric Horseman (1979)

  12. #12
    Cyburbian martini's avatar
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    I can just see it now....little Suzy/Bobby 16 year old, first day out with the new license and they pull up to the drive way. Punch the button to open the garage door, wait for it to open, then GUN the car up the drive. Only the gun it a little too much and end up in the kitchen!

    I'd love to see the dimwit that 1)approved it, 2) built it, and 3)actually bought it. I bet the collective IQ won't top 100. These jokers actually have a job, and I can't find a thing. Wonders will never cease!
    You're more boring than you know.

  13. #13
    Cyburbian Rumpy Tunanator's avatar
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    Originally posted by ludes98
    Can't believe someone designed and then actually built those launch ramps!
    Could be boat launch ramps if the flooded the area. Hey maybe thats what they're doing?
    A guy once told me, "Do not have any attachments, do not have anything in your life you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you spot the heat around the corner."


    Neil McCauley (Robert DeNiro): Heat 1995

  14. #14
    Cyburbian Queen B's avatar
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    Rumpy, that is what I was thinking, flood area.
    But still no reason for that type of stupidity.
    It is all a matter of perspective!!!

  15. #15
    Cyburbian Plus PlannerGirl's avatar
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    There is no way a car can get up the last drive, the slope is too much from the flat drive apron.
    "They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety." Ben Franklin

    Remember this motto to live by: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO- HOO what a ride!'"

  16. #16
    Cyburbian el Guapo's avatar
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    WTH?

    Is it me, or do these two homes scream their need for a basement front-facing garage? That would have been a "suburbia cookie-cutter home" acceptable solution, and it would fit the grade.


    Here is the sequence of events as I imagine it...

    Developer, "I can build this here same floorplan on any site! I bought these at the county fair six years ago and I ain't never had no complaints."

    Builder "Wilbur, ma said you ain't supposed to drink with that there ackel bra-ce-lete on."

    Cletus, "You ain't gotta hair, Wilbur. Taint no way you can build over yon lots. Hundered cash says ya ain't gotta hair."


    ...Six weeks later...
    Realtor, "These homes have the latest self cleaning driveway"

    Home Buyer's wife "I don't care if the next door neighbor went to Clemson too, we need to keep looking."

    Home Buyer Male, "We'll take it! It has to be a good deal cause it is so screwed up. We'll never need to sell it. I'm gonna park the bass boat on this side-skirt, when I get one. Please honey....Pleeeeeeeese."


    ...Two weeks later...
    Moving Van Guy to the Moving Van Truck Driver, "Dude, this thang got a Hemi?"

    Neighbor to the east, "At least no one will being playing basket ball in the drive way until 10:00 pm"


    ...Late October....
    Cross street neighbor, "Honey, park your old Accord across the street from the new neighbors. It is supposed to ice up tonight, and I feel like a new Honda is just one or two trips down their new driveway away."

    Trick-or-Treaters, "Screw these two houses..."

  17. #17
    Cyburbia Administrator Dan's avatar
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    Leaving the house during the winter



    Signs at the top of the driveway



    EG got me thinking ... what about moving in? There are no stairs to the front door.
    Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell. -- Edward Abbey

  18. #18
    Cyburbian PlannerByDay's avatar
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    WOW

    Those are insane. I showed them to a LA here in the office who worked in Georgia and Alabama and he says she has seen stuff like this down there but not to this extreme.

    WOW

    Typical of new development no walks leading from the sidewalk to the front door, if so they would need an escalator or the rope tow already suggested.

  19. #19
    (for now) Frozen Caveman Planner mendelman's avatar
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    How do you pour concrete at that angle????

  20. #20
    Cyburbian el Guapo's avatar
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    Originally posted by mendelman
    How do you pour concrete at that angle????
    [lisp]Thickly?[/lisp]

  21. #21
    Cyburbian Planderella's avatar
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    Hmmm.....it looks like somebody took the FEMA floodzone elevation requirements just a tad too far.
    "A witty woman is a treasure, a witty beauty is a power!"

  22. #22
    Cyburbian Rem's avatar
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    Anyone notice that the quality of the soil erosion control devices on these sites is right up there with the quality of the driveway design?

  23. #23
    Cyburbian Emeritus Chet's avatar
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    HEY PRUDENCE! Thats in Missouri for sure! Carlos T. approved them! LOLOL

  24. #24
    Cyburbian JNL's avatar
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    Insane!

    What soil erosion control devices?? Would that be the pretty rock garden you be talking 'bout?

  25. #25
    Cyburbian tsc's avatar
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    .....is someone really good at photoshop???

    unbelievable....
    "Yeehaw!" is not a foreign policy

    Renovating the '62 Metzendorf
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