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Caption Contest - 20 April 2004

Dan

Dear Leader
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
18,808
Points
69


Sam's Law violated in the first post. Go to town, folks.
 

giff57

Corn Burning Fool
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
5,452
Points
34
The chewing tobacco sale in the West Virginia WalMarts were a huge success!
 

NHPlanner

A shadow of my former self
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
9,961
Points
41
The murmur in the crowd was palpable, as each hoped to be the next trampled by a Wal-Mart crowd in hopes of their 15 minutes of fame on the local news.
 

Dragon

Cyburbian
Messages
750
Points
21
Bright lit Wal-Mart sign causes swarm of people to enter the human version of the bug zapper.
 

SGB

Cyburbian
Messages
3,388
Points
26
NHPlanner said:
The murmur in the crowd was palpable, as each hoped to be the next trampled by a Wal-Mart crowd in hopes of their 15 minutes of fame on the local news.......

....and hoped to launch a multi-million dollar lawsuit against Wal-Mart for failing to provide adequate safety precautions at their weekly "buy our cheap foreign-produced crap" sale.
 

mendelman

Unfrozen Caveman Planner
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
14,141
Points
58
the unifying thought within the crowd

"I can't wait to buy some more useless crap to make my life seem like it has worth."





(sorry, Walmart shoppers ;-) )
 
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Seabishop

Cyburbian
Messages
3,838
Points
25
APA's mobile workshop at the DC Convention entitled "Symposium on Big Box Development Issues" was a huge success at $50 per participant.

Ney-sayers are proven wrong as suburbanites walk to WalMart from miles around after gas prices skyrocket.

Hundreds of families come home to their new WalMart Apartments after the corporate giants bought and demolished their neighorhoods (with the town's help, of course).
 

Plannerbabs

Cyburbian
Messages
1,037
Points
23
197,598,453rd Wal-Mart opens

Pulling a crowd of thousands from the 567,453rd Wal-Mart, located five miles away, the 145,235,921st Wal-Mart, located six miles away in the opposite direction, and the 899,324th Wal-Mart, located eight miles away in the next town. "Box dinners 17 for $1.25!" one shopper exclaimed, "Now my life is complete!"

In a related story, five industries producing the components of boxed dinners have declared bankruptcy or closed.
 

mendelman

Unfrozen Caveman Planner
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
14,141
Points
58
Plannerbabs said:
Pulling a crowd of thousands from the 567,453rd Wal-Mart, located five miles away, the 145,235,921st Wal-Mart, located six miles away in the opposite direction, and the 899,324th Wal-Mart, located eight miles away in the next town. "Box dinners 17 for $1.25!" one shopper exclaimed, "Now my life is complete!"

In a related story, five industries producing the components of boxed dinners have declared bankruptcy or closed.


Alright, this may not be my place, but Plannerbabs wins!!

Thanks for the early afternoon larf. :)
 

SkeLeton

Cyburbian
Messages
4,853
Points
26
And now for insomniacs, Wal-Mart open 24 hours a day, so you can buy cheap plastic cr@p 24 hours a day! :-D
 
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Floridays

Cyburbian
Messages
769
Points
21
A Wal-Mart reveler performs the dance of joy after discovering huge discounts on polyester pantsuits.
 

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boiker

Cyburbian
Messages
3,889
Points
26
not to pick on the iq of walmart shoppers

"Hundreds of would be walmart shoppers stand while watching others attempt to push open the automatic sliding doors."
 

Mastiff

Gunfighter
Messages
7,181
Points
30
The recently deceased, following the fragile voice imploring them to "walk into the light... walk into the light..." discover that heaven really isn't all they were expecting.
 

ebeech121

Cyburbian
Messages
83
Points
4
Another successful attempt to lure white suburban women out of the house!

---------
Might I add as an aside---Good God that's scary!! That glowing is unearthly!
 

Budgie

Cyburbian
Messages
5,270
Points
30
Weeping Roll Back Smiley

Christians from all over the world have descended on the Walmart in Clovis, New Mexico to behold the latest in a series of big box miracles. The "Weeping Roll Back Smiley" has been hailed as a sign of divinity and the Vatican agrees that this may be the most significant sign from God since Liberache came out of the closet.
 

el Guapo

Capitalist
Messages
5,995
Points
31
With Appologies to all Southerners

A photo of the February 12, 2004 reunion of the entire first and second Clinton Administrations in the North Hope, Arkansas Wal-Mart Complex and Dinner Theater. Guest speaker Robert Reich was killed in a tragic pre-reception incident when a Wal-Mart store McDonald's franchise snack bar worker, Hugh Delmont Snodgrass, a local man who was assigned to the McCatering Team at the evening McReception Party, thought Mr. Reich was making fun of him when Mr. Reich began explaining "the inflationary effects of workforce displacement." Mr. Snodgrass was believed to have become enraged by the diminutive Reich after he thought Reich started acting like a "smart-ass college Jew boy from the big city" according to fellow fry chief operator Rolando Jamison. Mrs. Snodgrass, seen here in pink pants and a Velour/spandex blend jacket said, "H.D. never met no Jew boy before. You can't blame him for no killin, he war provoked."
 

mendelman

Unfrozen Caveman Planner
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
14,141
Points
58
Budgie said:
Christians from all over the world have descended on the Walmart in Clovis, New Mexico to behold the latest in a series of big box miracles. The "Weeping Roll Back Smiley" has been hailed as a sign of divinity and the Vatican agrees that this may be the most significant sign from God since Liberache came out of the closet.


Don't forget the elderly Greeter with stigmata in Rock Island, IL. ;-)
 

Budgie

Cyburbian
Messages
5,270
Points
30
mendelman said:
Don't forget the elderly Greeter with stigmata in Rock Island, IL. ;-)

Yeah, I heard about that. She touched a weeping roll back smiley and was miraculously cured. She would spot worthless cheap plastic crap from 4 aisles away. She has a new lease on life, thanks to the almighty.
 
Messages
12
Points
1
Let em have it Jayson!

:-c
Dan said:


Sam's Law violated in the first post. Go to town, folks.
Just another manic monday in front of Sam Walton's shlock house awaiting the arrival of Jayson Williams' "Clay Chauffeurs," designed especially for target practice.
 
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