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Cheesy, cheesy, cheesy Web sites

Dan

Dear Leader
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
17,346
Points
53
I'd like to discuss the phenomenon of gluegey Web sites. I think we've all stumbled on them before; some site on Geocities with loooong, angel and flower-adorned pages, polluted by sappy MIDI tunes, and littered with questionable awards.

http://www.marvelicious.com is one of 'em ... just found it in a search.

Why glurgey? Consider that the Web site is decorated like an overdone country kitchen. There's almost always the prerequisite subsections on American patriotism, Jesus, and the South. Angels ... lots of angels. Prayers and poems, too. For instance, thus beaut ...

"Littleton, Colorado wasn't the first
to feel the horror & disbelief...
Kids killed kids at Columbine High
while others remembered pain & grief.

Yes, parents of Jonesboro, Arkansas
and Pearl, Mississippi too...
know oh too well the horrific pain!
Oh, America, what must we do?"

and ...

"What if Sabrina is still alive?
And the news media is wrong?
Who will explain to Sabrina
why her capture took so long?

What if the Aisenbergs
are being falsely accused?
And all this time, poor Sabrina
suffers from cruel abuse?

What if tomorrow should bring
Sabrina's abductor to view?
What if she is covered with bruises,
would the blame lie with you?"

There's also a tribute to ... sniff ... I still can't believe he's dead ... sniff ...

http://www.marvelcreations.com/nascar.html

There's literally thousands of sites like the one I've linked above. For instance, http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Ithaca/9086/Site_Index/Page3.html, http://our.homewithgod.com/mywalkoffaith/ and http://www.serenitygarden.net/index.html. I'm convinced, folks, that I've found the source of all the junk e-mail messages our departmental secretaries forward to us. The fountain of glurge ... it's the subculture of southern women's uber-feminine sappy Web sites.
 

Cardinal

Cyburbian
Messages
10,078
Points
33
Truly beautiful, Dan. Heartfelt. Emotional. It brings a tear to my eye, and the faint hint of vomit to my thoat.

The Final Lap

A thrill was in the air that day
As the number three flashed past
Shouts and cheers rose on the wind
As his car sped by so fast.
The race had been so thrilling
The finish line just ahead
The thought did not occur to us
We'd see tragedy instead.
The final lap came all to soon
For a hero we held dear
Little did we know that day
That the end for him was near.
Our hearts are filled with sadness
Our hero had to leave
To race across the Heavens now
While we are left to grieve.
The gates of Heaven opened
His final trophy gleaming bright
He slowly gunned his engine
As he drove into the light
 

Wannaplan?

Galactic Superstar
Messages
3,115
Points
26
How about this hyper-dramatized, melodramatic, egotistical avatar? Some people think they're just so cool:

Mod Note (NHPlanner): Animated image deleted.
 

BKM

Cyburbian
Messages
6,464
Points
29
I've mentioned it before, but www.portalofevil.com loves these kinds of sites. Their favorite is the so-called "dead baby" site, where the mommie memoralizes their stillborn infant with photos and flowery prose. Of course, its juvenile and cruel to make fun of memorials to pain, but ...
 

Chet

Cyburbian Emeritus
Messages
10,624
Points
33
Dan that site was SOOOOO bad I couldnt bear to get past the first page.
 

Chet

Cyburbian Emeritus
Messages
10,624
Points
33
Beaner said:
How about this hyper-dramatized, melodramatic, egotistical avatar? Some people think they're just so cool:
BLECH. Its definitely got a certain "Ricco Suave' " quality.
 

Habanero

Cyburbian
Messages
3,241
Points
27
bturk said:


BLECH. Its definitely got a certain "Ricco Suave' " quality.
yeah, as in he belongs in 1991- know your place, biotch! (not you bturk, the rico dude) :)
 

Wannaplan?

Galactic Superstar
Messages
3,115
Points
26
Jack Van Impe Ministries

"The Bible Prophecy Portal of the Internet"

"Lives Changed"

"The most stunning new insights ever given by the Spirit of God to Dr. Jack Van Impe!"

http://www.jvim.com/

 

The Irish One

Member
Messages
2,267
Points
24
Dr. Gene Scott had the privelage of teaching John Ashcroft in college. Sorry, the privelage is clearly the other way around.

watch some of his videos, so boring and yet entertaining.
 

donk

Cyburbian
Messages
6,970
Points
29
I don't know what is worse, people actually creating most of the crap listed, or us going to look at it becasue it is so bad. kinda like telling someone to try something that tastes rotten so they can experience the pain too..
 
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