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Complete this sentence:

SGB

Cyburbian
Messages
3,388
Points
26
AIB a phone call I just made. Let's keep this thread on work-related SNAFUs.

You know you are in trouble when.....

.....you call the state library reference desk, and they have never heard of your county.
 

SkeLeton

Cyburbian
Messages
4,853
Points
26
You know you are in trouble when.....
...You wake up on a stranger's bed, not remembering anything and hearing the stranger's father trying to open the door and screaming though the door.
:p
 

Zoning Goddess

Cyburbian
Messages
13,852
Points
39
You go into your first meeting with the newly-hired Planning Manager and the first thing he says is "You know, nobody around here likes you." The second thing he says is "So, would you consider being zoning team leader?". (Oh no, I'm working for a male Sybil!)
 

GeogPlanner

Cyburbian
Messages
1,433
Points
25
that explains why i got the lead on the zoning project at my last firm before i left (got laid off)...

You know you are in trouble when... the other planner's grant funds are up and you make a joke about how you now have to work his job too and five minutes later the boss say's "how do you feel about brownfields?"
 
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Repo Man

Cyburbian
Messages
2,549
Points
25
The phone call begins with "I am So-and-so with the So-and-so law firm and we represent ______ <insert recently denied business owner here>."
 

Dan

Dear Leader
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
18,706
Points
69
... most of the turnout for the Planning Commission meeting is wearing flannel.

... most of the turnout for the Planning Commission meeting is from the local sign industry.

... the turnout for the Planning Commission meeting includes a pretty television reporter and a camera crew.

... your office is relocated to a room that used to be a utility closet.

... you hear "LOCK AND LOAD!" being yelled from the distance while you're in the field.

... your name appears in a letter to the editor, and the letter also includes the words "socialist" and "old Soviet Union."

... you're in the field, and you're within sight of a flying Nazi flag.

... the Planning Director, wearing a somber face, calls you into an empty conference room, and says "shut the door behind you."
 

BKM

Cyburbian
Messages
6,463
Points
29
you have ignored document formatting and protocol and you have a nasty voice mail from the 30-year veteran executive secretary. :)
 

JNA

Cyburbian Plus
Messages
25,803
Points
61
when at 7:45 am you want to make coffee and there is no coffee or filters available.
 

el Guapo

Capitalist
Messages
5,995
Points
31
...your roommated says "those aren't pillows!"

...your assistant asks "is this briefcase that angry developer left suposed to be ticking."

...there are six tall 45 year old white men in dark suits at your office's front door with a big bundle of those nylon handcuffs.

...you see this thing streaking in from the sky and it just keeps getting bigger and bigger.
 

Rumpy Tunanator

Cyburbian
Messages
4,473
Points
25
el Guapo said:
...your roommated says "those aren't pillows!"
WTF, then what are they?;) your roommated.... Oh I'll stop here.

-You know your in trouble when they ask to see your i.d. when your parked halfway on the street and sidewalk (diagonally people). Although they get what your doing after you explain it to them a few dozen times.
 

Cardinal

Cyburbian
Messages
10,080
Points
34
You walk into a meeting and realize you've spent some time naked with the woman across from you. (Well, not so bad, but a bit awkward.)
 

Tom R

Cyburbian
Messages
2,274
Points
25
BAD

There's a message on your answering machine from your live-in girlfriend's OB/GYN.

Someone walks into the room and says "Does anybody own a [describes your car]?"
 

Seabishop

Cyburbian
Messages
3,838
Points
25
The Mayor offers you a raise based upon “something you can do for him later tonight”

The Planning Board meeting in your New Hampshire town is interupted by either 100 new Libertarian transplants or 8 Democratic primary contenders

Mike Wallace is chasing you through the parking lot for some reason

An angry landowner wants to know if its considered a “taking” if he cuts off one of your fingers

You realize the “tannery” you approved isn’t the same thing as a tanning salon
 

Planit

Cyburbian
Messages
13,155
Points
54
...when the first thing your daughter says when you get home is "Daddy, it was an accident, really!"
 

ofos

Vintage Cyburbian
Messages
8,278
Points
27
you've just hit "send" with a scathing comment to a co-worker about a highly favored consultant's proposal and realize that the default was "Reply All" and that the consultant and upper management are receiving your unguarded comments at that very moment.

Notes: Yes, I did. No, I didn't lose my job. Was highly embarrassed at the time, BUT my comment later proved to be a correct assessment when he was publicly berated by a senior VP over that same proposal.
 

KSharpe

Cyburbian
Messages
744
Points
19
You know you're in trouble when...
The opposition to the conditional use you're presenting (and recommending approval for) have all got matching t-shirts. (Man, that was geekey)
 

kjel

Super Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
12,488
Points
41
You know you are in trouble when....

The first question of the day is "Are you committed to your job?" which is followed by a rant. :-c

She felt bad later and told me to take $20 and the secretary out to the beach for half an hour and eat a gelatto. It was the best part of the day...well until she left :D
 

Hceux

Cyburbian
Messages
1,028
Points
22
You know when you are in trouble when... you cannot spell 'complete' properly and yet Cyburbians are still responding to this thread with posts, while not saying anything about the spelling error.
 

Queen B

Cyburbian
Messages
3,178
Points
25
I loved the one about the flannel shirts!

You know you are in trouble when you seem to hear the theme from Andy Griffith being whistled all around you.
 

michaelskis

Cyburbian
Messages
20,175
Points
51
... two guys with earpieces and dark suits are waiting for you in the lobby. (yes it has happened, no I did not get in trouble, my neighbor on the other hand...)

... your told about a fee increase and assessment right before the condo association election...(I was voted back in regardless)

... your fiancée starts a sentence with, I am working on wedding stuff and I need your opinion.

... a conversation starts, I need to file a complaint about my neighbor.

... you start a new job and realize that you slept with your bosses college age daughter a few weeks earlier. (She stopped in to bring him lunch)
 

dandy_warhol

Cyburbian
Messages
9,415
Points
40
You know you're in trouble when....

your male boss says to you and another female coworker he's cranky because its been so long since he's had s.e.x. :-{:-o:-|
 

Tresmo

Cyburbian
Messages
873
Points
20
I loved the one about the flannel shirts!

You know you are in trouble when you seem to hear the theme from Andy Griffith being whistled all around you.
You know you are in trouble when you seem to hear the theme from Deliverance being played by banjos all around you.
 
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JNA

Cyburbian Plus
Messages
25,803
Points
61
You know you are in trouble when you seem to hear the theme from Jaws in your head while you are swimming alone in the ocean.
 

RandomPlanner

Cyburbian
Messages
1,742
Points
25
A variance application starts with "According to NYS law ..."

Incidentally, it was hand written all down the margin of the page.
 

ruralplanner

Cyburbian
Messages
138
Points
6
- The majority of your new planning committee has names like Marvin, Tommy, Dwight, Duane, Delbert and Wayne.

- In front of your new boss on your first planning job you tell a local city administrator that his city is rotting because he allowed a 40-acre TIF for Wal-Mart. :-c True story. And I made it past probation.

- After the close of a a town board meeting the town board breaks open a case of beer and cheese and crackers and still continues to talk about town business...and your sitting there with them eating and drinking. :-| Another true story.
 

cch

Cyburbian
Messages
1,436
Points
20
When on election day your boss says "you voted for Bush, right?"
 

Bear Up North

Cyburbian Emeritus
Messages
9,329
Points
31
You know you are in trouble when.....

The "60 Minutes" team is in your lobby. :-c
_____

You pull in your driveway at 3:00 AM, with the new girlfriend, and your ex-wife's car is there and the bedroom light is on. :-{
_____

Two (2) beautiful women, sans clothing, begging you to go skinny-dipping with them, jump on you while you sleep....and you push them away because you had too much to drink. :-c:-c:-o:p:-$:a::-x

Bear
 

otterpop

Cyburbian
Messages
6,655
Points
28
You know you are in trouble when . . .

You are reading the latest edition of The Onion and the planning story mirrors what is currently going on in your city or county.
 

Queen B

Cyburbian
Messages
3,178
Points
25
You know you are in trouble when... you tell the applicant you need a site plan and it comes in with the application in crayon.
The apple trees were really pretty!
 

TOFB

Cyburbian
Messages
2,519
Points
31
You carelessly proofread the 133 neighbor letters mailed out for the upcoming PUBIC HEARING
 

Tom R

Cyburbian
Messages
2,274
Points
25
bad news

You know you are in trouble when you wake up and there is a chalk line drawn around your body.:-c
 

michaelskis

Cyburbian
Messages
20,175
Points
51
You know you are in trouble when you seem to hear the theme from Jaws in your head while you are swimming alone in the ocean.
..... when you get a PM from JAWS while posting ;)


or
... your watching TV and you see a live police chase and recognize your front porch.

... you come home and a guy introduces himself by saying &#8220;Hi, my name is Stone Phillips from Dateline NBC.&#8221;
 
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chrisinmd

Cyburbian
Messages
322
Points
11
When you mis-spelled public as pubic in your report to the Planning Commission.

some citizen is berating you at Planning Commission about the tree in front of the yellow house and you never went on a site visit.

you wake up hugging the toilet bowl in a strange looking house.
 

Bear Up North

Cyburbian Emeritus
Messages
9,329
Points
31
You know you are in troulbe when......you wake up in a downtown Calgary hotel, laying next to you is an older Indian with very few teeth, and she has your ring on her finger.

:-c

Bear
 

Maister

Chairman of the bored
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
28,701
Points
71
You know you are in trouble when.....

- you're working front counter and a resident walks in carrying a zip-loc bag filled with dog feces

- a smug-sounding caller prefaces their conversation with the phrase "I'd like to ask you a very simple and elementary question..."

- a sign contractor begins their conversation with the phrase "I was on-line reading your Zoning Code's definition of "sign" and I wondered....."
 

Planit

Cyburbian
Messages
13,155
Points
54
...when the PB Chair & Vice-chair have private meetings with commissioners to discuss staff projects and priorities
 

Otis

Cyburbian
Messages
5,169
Points
29
...the city manager walks into your office and says, "You're not in trouble."
 

illinoisplanner

Cyburbian
Messages
5,335
Points
25
...some strange large man stumbles into your home at 2am while your party is winding down and nobody in the room has any clue who he is.

...after heavily drinking, you're starting to pass out at a table in a large crowded bar and you feel like you're going to :victory:

...you find out from your friends that 6 police cars from multiple agencies were called to the house because of your actions the previous night and you have no idea what they're talking about

...your angry Indian boss calls all the staff in for a meeting and you work at a place where meetings don't usually happen

...you're ending a phone call with your girlfriend and she hesitates before saying "I love you too"

...you're protesting then-Governor Blago at a parade and in the midst of your interviews with the local TV news stations, police officers begin to approach you

...some resident approaches you while you're out taking pictures and starts name-dropping every department head, asking which one you fall under

...at a public hearing, a resident walks over to your boss, tells your boss a secret, and they begin to both snicker while looking at you

...you're in a P&Z commissioner's driveway dropping off a packet, it's almost the end of the day, and the city vehicle you're driving won't start

...you're asked by a female code inspector to come with her to a site visit because there's an an asshole property owner and she's concerned for her safety

...the pickup truck that drove by with its riders yelling harassing things to you, your brother, and your cousin while you were playing basketball returns 10 minutes later because your brother flipped them off as they drove by earlier
 
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