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El Guapo had to have written this ...

Dan

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http://www.theonion.com/onion3906/women_now_empowered.html ... it's one of the first Onion articles that made me fall over laughing in a loooong time.

An excerpt ...

Eating energy bars specially fortified with nutrients "for women" has become a feminist trend, as well.

"Unlike traditional, phallocentric energy bars, whose chocolate, soy protein, nuts, and granola ignored the special health and nutritional needs of women, their new, female-oriented counterparts like Luna are ideally balanced with a more suitable amount of chocolate, soy protein, nuts, and granola," Klein said. "Proto-feminist pioneers like Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony could never have imagined that female empowerment would one day come in bar form."


What's scary is that this could almost be an article you would find in the local feminist rag (no pun intended).

There's other great El Guapo-esque articles in this week's Onion, too.

"Expressing one's feelings and emotions via the firing of guns into the air is an ancient and noble artform," said Henri St. Germain, president of the Federation Internationale des Discharges-Aeriales (FIDA), the sport's governing body. "In fact, it may even predate the practice of expressing one's feelings and emotions by shooting into other humans. And nowhere on Earth does this tradition continue to thrive more than in Iraq and Kentucky. It is a vital part of these two unique cultures."
 

Cardinal

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I'll always support the feminist cause. Encouraging women to have sex as an expression of their independence and as a form of empowerment (the sexual revolution) was pure genious! Way to go, guys!
 

el Guapo

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I can neither confirm nor deny my association with the creative staff of the Onion.
 

Jeff

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Check out the "LUNA Chicks" mountain bike team...Marla Streb is pretty hot....
 

donk

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Marla Streb,

Did'nt she pose semi nude in a yeti ad a few years ago.

i think it was either her or Leigh Donovan that was an exotic dancer.

i know Marla wore a string bikini to the "sensuality party" after the world cup at mte ste anne about 3 years ago....
 
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HEE! Here is my favorite line from the article:
"Only by lauding every single thing a woman does, no matter how ordinary, can you truly go, girls."

I hate to say it, but one of my friends loves to send out the "Girlfriend's Week" email, I've gotten it from her at least 3 times, and it makes me cringe every time.

On a side note regarding gender equality, I really wanted to, but just can't even watch Survivor this season, because the girls team sucks so horribly and pathetically bad. They are totally inept at making fire, shelter, fishing (when they just won a huge bucket of bait) and cooking with manioch flour. This show is setting back women 40 years. sigh.
 

el Guapo

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Kelly - I love Triumph the Insult Dog. I saw him on his first appearance on Conan. What a hoot.

My wife never got the "for me to Poop on" line. She suggested therapy.
 

Repo Man

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KMateja said:
HEE! On a side note regarding gender equality, I really wanted to, but just can't even watch Survivor this season, because the girls team sucks so horribly and pathetically bad. They are totally inept at making fire, shelter, fishing (when they just won a huge bucket of bait) and cooking with manioch flour. This show is setting back women 40 years. sigh.
The females on the Real World/Road Rules Battle of the Sexes seem to be having a tough time themselves. Even when they win challenges, they can't help but mess up. The guys have it down pat. You have the fewest points, you get eliminated. The girls keep experimenting with different methods, then end up crying when people don't like the result.
 
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jtfortin said:


The females on the Real World/Road Rules Battle of the Sexes seem to be having a tough time themselves. Even when they win challenges, they can't help but mess up. The guys have it down pat. You have the fewest points, you get eliminated. The girls keep experimenting with different methods, then end up crying when people don't like the result.
J - do you ever read colin's recaps? Here's his mom's quote about the girls team: “These women are the most pathetic representation of women that I’ve ever seen… how sad for young girls to have to watch these girls represent the female team.”
 

Cardinal

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From the Wisconsin State Journal:

MOUNT HOREB - Registration for a 12-week program entitled "Flames: Teen Girl Empowerment," will be at the Budding Artist Center and Creative Space, Mount Horeb.

A free open house will be held to introduce the program, which is designed to offer intergenerational support to the struggles and dreams of girls ages 13 to 18.
 
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