First Annual Cyburbia Haiku Contest

[Chet]

Here it is! Now through Thursday August 8th, post your planning or cyburbia haikus. On August 9th I'll draft a poll and we'll vote for the winner (prize to be announced at a latter date).

Place your title in the Subject line and Haiku in the message box. Remember to use the syllabic 5-7-5 format!

 

[Chet]

RUN KITTY RUN

Log on Plannergirl

Talk Latex and PVC

Now Get Back to Work

 

[Tranplanner]

Awesome

I am so happy
I love haiku you know, eh?
Cool contest bturk

 

[Downtown]

The pleasure and Pain of Cyburbia Haiku

log on, sip coffee
damn cyburbia again
coffee out my nose

 

[Chet]

Aye Carumba

Thanks to El Guapo

MarryTheresa was here

I wet my chinos

 

[Tranplanner]

Ode to El Guapo

El Guapo, the man
Master of the photoshop
I bow in humbleness

 

[Chet]

Die Commie Planner

Die Commie Planner

Rezone me R-6

I want a duplex

 

[Repo Man]

Work Sucks

It is nine o'clock
I am ready to go home
Is it Friday yet

 

[Repo Man]

AICP

Letter in the mail
AICP results are in
What do I get now?

 

[Chet]

Hot Psycho Guy

The Hot Psycho Guy

Will He find a 10 - K bride?

I wish we could know...

 

[Chet]

Its the Syllables

My friend El Guapo

Haiku is five-seven-five

When will you learn it

 

[Chet]

El Guapo to KMateja

Over Objections

I secretly email Rob

Giving love advice

 

[Downtown]

ok, seriously just dribbled coffee down my chin onto my sassy yellow shirt. thanks bturk.

 

[el Guapo]

5-7-5?

I know 5-7-5. These are just the raw material. Sort of establishing a copyright for the themes. I'll edit them later.

I actual have work to do today. Perhaps I should only post finished product? humm...

Are you sure you work in the private sector?

(I received a poor mark in Haiku back at the childrens vegan learning collective in Bekeley. I did get an A in aggression and fasioning weapons out of children's toys though...)

 

[Downtown]

procrastination
thy name is meeting minutes
wednesdays are wasted

 

[Tranplanner]

Ode to Dan

Dan, Dan, he's our guy
Ruler of Cyburbia
Must wonder sometimes...

Dan, Dan, he's our man
lovelorn florida planner
Spare those kittens please

 

[Tranplanner]

Ode to Plannergirl

Plannergirl dresses up
Latex, PVC and thongs
male planners tremble

 

[PlannerGirl]

oh jezzzz!

 

[Tranplanner]

Mudbug doesn't play here anymore

Rants with much venom
scorning planners who goof off
get a life, mudbug

 

[donk]

Landscape

Sorry, I posted this originally in the wrong spot.


Landscape

who finds this normal
many dead cars in the front yard
rednecks and white trash

 

[Chet]

Holy Land

Religious land uses

The scourge of NHPlanner

God will forgive you

 

[Chet]

Re: Mudbug doesn't play here anymore

**snaps fingers in beatnik approval**

 

[Glomer]

Planner girl is hot
oh so her avatar shows
push up braws kick a#$

code enforcement sucks
some people are so stupid
makes me want to die

 

[NHPlanner]

Re: Holy Land

Religious land uses

The scourge of NHPlanner

God will forgive you

Thanks Brian....

The public hearings are in 2 weeks.

And you've inspired me...

I do not hate god
buddah, mohammed, or christ
LET THIS PROJECT END!

 

[Mastiff]

Ode to kittens.

PVC Planner
My loyalties are canine
Pass the baby oil

 

[Mastiff]

Cathedrals

Oh, Planderella
The confession was in vain
Here we are again

 

[Mastiff]

Weekends

Grant app on my desk
Was just placed there yesterday
Due date is Monday

 

[nerudite]

Gotta Wake Up

Need a pick me up!
Office coffee really sucks.
Yay! Cyburbia!

 

[Glomer]

junk cars junk cars suck!
junk cars junk cars junk cars suck!
junk cars junk cars suck!

 

[nerudite]

Big box lament

Sea of cars and trucks
Baking asphalt, why no trees?
Must protect sign views

 

[Repo Man]

NIMBY

Don't you put that there
The land should stay open space
But I won't buy it

 

[Glomer]

don't develop there
that would be suburban sprawl
my house was as well

 

[Tranplanner]

What Dan Saw (with apologies to Plannergirl)

See his jaw drop wide
Plannergirl has sent a pic
one more dead kitten

 

[Repo Man]

You can't have it both ways

I want low taxes
I oppose development
I am a moron

 

[Tranplanner]

Ode to Tranplanner (me)

Is he a Planner?
Or is he an Engineer?
Despised by both now.

 

[Repo Man]

Thanks bturk

I would like to thank bturk for startiing this contest. I am sure that everyone who passes by my office is wondering why I am talking to myself and counting syllables with my fingers.

 

[El Feo]

Drawbridge-Raiser

Don't permit that house -
I like the open field there!
Me? Moved here last week.

 

[El Feo]

The Prices Are Good

Damn those big boxes -
(Shh! Yes, I shop at Wal-Mart,
But I don't like it.)

 

[El Feo]

Redneck Zoning

The four G's of good
Guv'mint: God, Gates, Guns and Get
the Hell off my land

 

[donk]

Run Kitty Run Part 2

my take onthis popular topic


a lonely planner
little cats run for your lives
oops it is too late

 

[Downtown]

Ok, I've actually printed some of these out and put them on my cork board for the enjoyment of all who comes into my office. Excellent idea Bturk.

 

[Downtown]

Fifty Foot Setback!
Destroyer of the street scape.
where has back yard gone?

 

[donk]

reading the forum
laughing in my own office
others wonder why

This is starting to get easier, the first two took forever to make work...

 

[El Feo]

Affordable Housing

Trailer dwellers fight
that new apartment building
Don't want "those people"

 

[El Feo]

State Worker

Sitting here typing
Avoid work - compose poems!
I'm a state worker.

 

[Dan]

Trade dress

but we have to have
that bright yellow canopy
or we'll go elsewhere

 

[Downtown]

to expand on dan's theme...

That's a deal breaker!
No truck docks next to the houses?
We'll take Lowe's elsewhere!

 

[Cardinal]

DNR

Ditch relocation.
A water of the US.
You need a permit.

Ditch relocation.
Restore the natural stream.
But it was man-made!

Need to fill wetland
Created three years ago.
Why is this so hard?

New jobs and taxes
Helping the city to grow
Mean nothing to them.

Avoid and minimize.
Done, now fill and compensate?
Mitigation sucks!

We made this wetland.
Haven't we proven ourselves?
DNR is dogmatic.

 

[Chet]

Pfffffffft

Problem at office

Break wind near secretary

Won't live this one down

 

[El Feo]

Did I say that out loud?

Would be nice to say
to applicant what you think:
"GO POUND SAND, F-CKTARD!"