'Florida Man' game

[Maister]

This game has been making the rounds on the internet lately. Isn't it time we join in the fun here?

Google "Florida man" and your month and date of birth and post the headline for that day here. It may be possible to get multiple hits on interesting headlines, so feel free to post more than once on this thread!

Mine:
Florida man, drunk and naked, allegedly set house on fire in failed cookie baking attempt

 

[Bubba]

This game has been making the rounds on the internet lately. Isn't it time we join in the fun here?

Google "Florida man" and your month and date of birth and post the headline here. It may be possible to get multiple hits on interesting headlines, so feel free to post more than once on this thread!

Mine:
Florida man, drunk and naked, allegedly set house on fire in failed cookie baking attempt

A Florida Man let it all hang out at a strip club, dancer says. He wasn’t part of the act.

 

[JNA]

This is why everyone is Googling 'Florida man' and their birthday

This is why everyone is Googling 'Florida man' and their birthday

What 'Florida man' headline comes up for your birthday? People are Googling it to find out in the Florida Man Challenge.

www.usatoday.com

Florida Man Challenge: Which ridiculous headline matches your birthday?

Florida Man Challenge: Which ridiculous headline matches your birthday?

We can thank a viral tweet for bringing some of Florida’s most bizarre news stories back on our screens and in our hearts.

www.tampabay.com

 

[DVD]

Florida man attacks McDonalds employee and instantly regrets it

 

[Maister]

Florida Man Attacks Mother With Potato Salad

 

[AG74683]

Florida man says 3 syringes found in his butt aren't his

https://www.nbc-2.com/story/39752563/florida-man-says-3-syringes-found-in-his-butt-arent-his

 

[mendelman]

Florida man confirms he has never been to Disney World, somehow owes Disney money.

 

[Maister]

Florida man confirms he has never been to Disney World, somehow owes Disney money.

"Disney officials indicate that because he is a native, he has both a moral and fiduciary obligation to support the corporation and the local economy, hence the bill for $475..."

 

[Whose Yur Planner]

Florida man tries to ride a live alligator. Drugs and/or alcohol not involved.

 

[mendelman]

Florida man moves to Valdosta, Georgia, instantly 'dead' to his Florida family.


Florida man, 67, doesn't see a problem with neighbor's vintage car tire 'collection' outdoor display.

 

[ursus]

Florida Man Dials 911 and Demands a Ride Home "to Change His Underwear".

 

[terraplnr]

Florida Man Drops Stolen* TV from Getaway Scooter

*stolen from Walmart of course

 

[shell_waster]

Florida Man Arrested For Throwing An Adult Toy On Field Last Night In Buffalo

Florida man gets stuck after climbing down 30-foot well 'for bragging rights'

 

[Maister]

Florida man demands cash, donuts during Krispy Kreme robbery attempt.

"open up the cash register! Oh, and I'll take a half dozen glazed to go...."

 

[Planit]

Florida Man Tells Police He Burned Florida Gators Flag on Car Because He’s a Miami Hurricanes Fan

 

[Richmond Jake]

Florida man robs gas station while wearing drawn-on goatee

 

[Dan]

There's a bunch of them, but I like this one the best.

Bradenton, Florida Man Arrested After Giving Several “Wedgies” to Bradenton Movie Goers

Beats a mass shooting. And, to be an equal opportunity offender::

Police bust Florida woman with 4 Rolexes hidden in her body cavity

I'll let you guess what cavity they're talking about.

 

[Super Amputee Cat]

Florida Man Arrested After Threatening To Kill Politicians Who Vote No on Kavanaugh's Confirmation

http://time.com/5416674/florida-kavanaugh-vote-threat/

 

[JNA]

Predictably, Florida Man Blows Off Part of His Hand in July 4th Fireworks Accident

Predictably, Florida Man Blows Off Part of His Hand in July 4th Fireworks Accident

Lauderhill (WTFF) – Another Florida man blew off part of his hand playing with fireworks on the Fourth of July. His name wasn’t released, so we’ll just call him Florida Man. The injury resulted in a “partial amputation” of Florida Man’s hand, according to Lauderhill Fire PIO. The incident took...

wtfflorida.com

Florida man hit by celebratory gunfire during Fourth of July fireworks show

Florida man hit by celebratory gunfire during Fourth of July fireworks show

The man received treatment at an area hospital and is expected to be okay, police said.

www.usatoday.com

Five Best July 4th Florida Arrests

Five Best July 4th Florida Arrests

Ah, the Fourth of July. Fireworks, hot dogs, family, and 'MERICA, dammit. It's fun. But if you're in Florida, it's also dangerous. Down here, we look for illegal fireworks (that would be anything that flies through the air or explodes), and often we have too much fun take shit too...

www.browardpalmbeach.com

 

[Bubba]

 

[Whose Yur Planner]

My state had a Florida moment. A woman shot, possibly killed, a man while in a car on the Coast, while in a car. She then drove them up to my fair city, about an 1.15, 1.5 hours away.

 

[Wannaplan?]

That’s not Richard Florida, the economic development guru who turned the urban planning world upside down with his seminal work, Bowling Alone... No, that’s leading man Gary Busey who is the superstar actor who played a loving father and husband in David Lynch’s acclaimed and beloved Lost Highway film from the late 90s.

 

[michaelskis]

Florida Man Screaming About Vampires Allegedly Sets Fire In His Own House

Florida Man Screaming About Vampires Allegedly Sets Fire In His Own House

www.inquisitr.com

On the other hand NC is quickly hitting that vibe too...
'Sharks are still good people:' North Carolina shark attack survivor Paige Winter says she's 'popping' through recovery

'Sharks are still good people:' North Carolina shark attack survivor Paige Winter says she's 'popping' through recovery

The father of the North Carolina high school student who survived a shark attack joined doctors to share his daughter's incredible story.

abc11.com

(I was not aware that shark were people)

 

[JNA]

Who is Florida Man?

https://www.cjr.org/business_of_news/florida-man-news.php

Florida man thought he bought a villa, actually paid thousands for tiny 100-by-1 foot strip of land

Florida man thought he bought a villa, actually paid thousands for tiny 100-by-1 foot strip of land

The man thought he bought a villa for $9,100 in an online auction, but in reality he won the patch of grass between two of them.

www.nydailynews.com

You’ve heard of Florida Man. Now, brace yourselves for the TV show.

You’ve heard of Florida Man. Now, brace yourselves for the TV show.

With all the weird and wacky crime stories that go on in the Sunshine State, Florida Man is finally getting a TV show on Oxygen.

www.miamiherald.com

Would you watch ?

 

[luckless pedestrian]

best thread ever

 

[kjel]

Gator decides to join couple for a swim

 

[MD Planner]

Jeezus. That's terrifying.

 

[Maister]

I guess Michigan is officially a wannabe now...

Michigan Man Uses Blowtorch to Kill Weeds, Sets Trailer Park on Fire

www.msn.com

 

[Bubba]

I guess Michigan is officially a wannabe now...

Michigan = Floriduh North

 

[mendelman]

Michigan = Floriduh North

You get out into the interior of MI and you definitely run into a lot of northern rednecks/hillbillies. Trust me. I spent the first 20 years of a life living around many.

 

[Maister]

You get out into the interior of MI and you definitely run into a lot of northern rednecks/hillbillies. Trust me. I spent the first 20 years of a life living around many.

Indeed. Isn't there some kind of saying like 'you can take a boy out of the sticks but you can never....[something or other I forget what]?'

 

[JNA]

so what that it was girl - still a crazy story

Fla. Teen Allegedly Stole Parents' Debit Card to Fund Murder-for-Hire Plot Against Them

Fla. Teen Allegedly Stole Parents' Debit Card to Fund Murder-for-Hire Plot Against Them

Teen Allegedly Steals Parents' Money to Fund Their Murders

www.yahoo.com

 

[luckless pedestrian]

Florida Man Awarded $37,500 After Cops Mistake Glazed Doughnut Crumbs For Meth

 

[mendelman]

Florida Man Awarded $37,500 After Cops Mistake Glazed Doughnut Crumbs For Meth

Officer: Well...he did seem pretty wired...so I just assumed...

 

[JNA]

Florida Man Awarded $37,500 After Cops Mistake Glazed Doughnut Crumbs For Meth

Just don't eat glazed donuts in your car.

 

[Dan]

I thought I'd put in December 25. The first relevant hit?

Florida man worried about vampires burns down his house, police say

A Daytona Beach man was arrested this week after police said he burned down his own house after screaming about vampires.

www.local10.com

From the article. It's really kind of sad.

"But by 7 p.m., Weaver grew angry and began hitting his wife and breaking windows with his cane, police said. "The vampires are going to defend themselves," he shouted, according to the arrest report/"

Here's something a bit different. Spoilering the first item for mature content.

Butt-Plug Bandit Says He Was Too Embarrassed to Buy One

Christopher Masters was a bit too embarrassed to bring his purchases to the cashier at the Spencer's Gift Shop in Vero Beach, Florida. So instead he shoved the "screw butt plug" and "stroker can" down his khaki shorts and tried to steal them back on December 10.

And the second item:

"Dawk Meikle's husband was farting in bed, so who could blame her for trying to get him to stop. She began elbowing him, but her husband kept mining for gas. So Meikle, 55, kept punching and kicking. The squirmish turned into a full-fledged fight after Meikle's husband attempted to restrain her. The man eventually received about seven to eight scratches on his chest and had his shirt torn in three different places. The incident happened in the early hours of December 11 in Port St. Lucie. Meikle was charged with domestic battery. "

Florida Man Arrested For Throwing An Adult Toy On Field Last Night In Buffalo

Go Bills.

 

[Whose Yur Planner]

I thought I'd put in December 25. The first relevant hit?

Florida man worried about vampires burns down his house, police say

A Daytona Beach man was arrested this week after police said he burned down his own house after screaming about vampires.

www.local10.com

From the article. It's really kind of sad.

"But by 7 p.m., Weaver grew angry and began hitting his wife and breaking windows with his cane, police said. "The vampires are going to defend themselves," he shouted, according to the arrest report/"
Here's something a bit different. Spoilering the first item for mature content.

Butt-Plug Bandit Says He Was Too Embarrassed to Buy One

Christopher Masters was a bit too embarrassed to bring his purchases to the cashier at the Spencer's Gift Shop in Vero Beach, Florida. So instead he shoved the "screw butt plug" and "stroker can" down his khaki shorts and tried to steal them back on December 10.

And the second item:

"Dawk Meikle's husband was farting in bed, so who could blame her for trying to get him to stop. She began elbowing him, but her husband kept mining for gas. So Meikle, 55, kept punching and kicking. The squirmish turned into a full-fledged fight after Meikle's husband attempted to restrain her. The man eventually received about seven to eight scratches on his chest and had his shirt torn in three different places. The incident happened in the early hours of December 11 in Port St. Lucie. Meikle was charged with domestic battery. "



Go Bills.

Daytona Beach police said Weaver's wife sought to have him committed for mental health reasons-Ya think

 

[JNA]

Florida couple had $ex inside patrol car after arrest for riding bicycles while drunk: reports

Florida couple had sex inside patrol car after arrest for riding bicycles while drunk: reports

A couple arrested in Florida late Friday for riding their bicycles while intoxicated made matters worse for themselves when they started having sex in the back of the patrol car, authorities say.

www.foxnews.com

 

[Dan]

$ex

Moderator note:

It's okay. You can use the word "sex" here.

 

[JNA]

Florida woman arrested after parents find 24 pipe bombs in her bedroom

Florida woman arrested after parents find 24 pipe bombs in her bedroom

A 27-year-old Florida woman was arrested after her parents found two dozen pipe bombs in her bedroom and called the local sheriff's office, authorities said Friday.

www.foxnews.com

 

[JNA]

Deputies ask man to quit calling about his stolen marijuana
Authorities say a Florida man repeatedly called 911 to report that his roommate had stolen his marijuana.

Deputies ask man to quit calling about his stolen marijuana

Authorities say a Florida man repeatedly called 911 to report that his roommate had stolen his marijuana.

www.nbcnews.com

 

[Planit]

A Florida man High School principal stated he couldn't confirm the Holocaust was a factual event.

A principal in Florida said he couldn't confirm the Holocaust was a 'factual' event. The school district just fired him

A former high school principal in Boca Raton, Florida, was fired on Wednesday as a result of emails he sent to a student's parent in April 2018 that appeared to cast doubt on the historical truth of the Holocaust.

www.cnn.com

 

[JNA]

Florida man arrested for trying to get alligator drunk

Florida man arrested for trying to get alligator drunk

A Florida man was reportedly arrested for trying to get an alligator drunk after his pal captured the reptile. Timothy Kepke, 27, of Hobe Sound allegedly fed some beer to the animal, which also bit…

nypost.com

told authorities he had consumed a few beers that day, but claimed he wasn’t intoxicated during the incident.
After the beer feeding, which was recorded,

Florida man in Trump costume punched in face by 14-year-old girl: cops

Florida man in Trump costume punched in face by 14-year-old girl: cops

A Florida man dressed as President Trump allegedly got decked in the jaw by a teenage girl — whose friends filmed the thwacking and posted it on Instagram, officials said. The costumed victim…

nypost.com

A Florida man dressed as President Trump allegedly got decked in the jaw by a teenage girl — whose friends filmed the thwacking and posted it on Instagram, officials said.

These Florida stereotypes are the strongest (yes, even stronger than Florida Man)

These Florida stereotypes are the strongest (yes, even stronger than Florida Man)

When Americans think of Florida, what’s the No. 1 thing they think of? It’s not Florida Man, alligators or Disney. It's “old people” according to a survey done by the website AreaVibes.com.

www.sun-sentinel.com

 

[Planit]

tRump is now a "Florida Man'

Trump ditches New York to become a Florida resident, court documents show

President Donald Trump, a native New Yorker, has now declared himself a Florida resident, according to court documents.

www.cnn.com

 

[Richmond Jake]

We don't want him here. Skip it and move to Moscow.

 

[Veloise]

Five Florida men/county commissioners eschew the NYT for their county library

“I don’t want the New York Times in this county. I don’t like them. It’s fake news."
"I support President Trump. I would say they put stuff in there that’s not necessarily verified.”
“Do we really need to subscribe to the New York Times?”
“Why the heck would we spend money on something like that?”

 

[JNA]

Five Florida men/county commissioners eschew the NYT for their county library

a subscription to the New York Times could open the door to requests for subscriptions to radical publications.

is this the mental version of General Jack D Ripper about fluoridation ?