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Funny, embarrassing or inappropriate things said at work

otterpop

Cyburbian
Messages
6,655
Points
28
I am sure we've all been caught paying no attention or little attention, and saying something that was not appropriate or was embarrassing or funny as a result.

Today, while working on one of my staff reports, my boss (a woman) stepped in and asked me to do something. Half-listening and attempting not to break my concentration, I did what I often do at home, I absently said "yes, dear." My boss laughed and commented that my wife had me well trained.

How about the rest of you? Surely you must have some faux pas at work.
 

RandomPlanner

Cyburbian
Messages
1,737
Points
25
Today, the County Supervisor was in my office (with several others) and made some comment about him being old. Rather than saying something complimentary (like, "you're not old") or just shutting my mouth (which has always been a problem for me), I, being out of college for less than 2 years, said "Eh, it's gotta happen to someone, I guess." I didn't think it was that big of a deal until everyone else just stared at me, mouths open. Finally someone broke the silence when they said that I had to work on my kissing up skills. [ooops:-$ ]
 

PlannerByDay

Cyburbian
Messages
1,827
Points
24
I was doing a public workshop presentation and there we a lot of people in the crowd I knew and recogonized while others were less familiar and this was their first public workshop with this community.

So I am standing in front of all these people may 20 and I welcomed everone and said "There are a lot of familiar faces in the crowd and a lot of strange ones, can I have each person state their name and whether they are resident, business owners or both"

The all laughed at the "strange faces" comment
 

mendelman

Unfrozen Caveman Planner
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
13,900
Points
57
In a plan review meeting (with personnel from other depts. so no one that could fire me), I made an off-hand comment about the quality of Dunkin Donuts' donuts. After I educated the group about the fact that the donuts are no longer made on site and are shipped in everyday, I followed by saying "that's why they taste like ass!"

Could be considered 'inappropirate', but they laughed.
 

Jaxspra

Cyburbian
Messages
3,516
Points
24
Although what I said is true, I didn't expect it to be quoted in the Post...we have a guy here that owns a historic building and quite a few others in the older part of town. He has obviously taken on too many properties and was getting a ton of violations, it got pretty bad at one point, City put stop work orders, guy got arrested, etc...anyway the reporter called me to ask about some of the issues and I was quoted saying"If he can't finish one project, then stop starting new ones". It wouldn't have bothered me so much to see it except of course the reporter had to pull it out and bold it next to the picture of the guys property.
I am sure there are plenty of embarrassing things I have said other times, just not coming to mind at the moment....
 

zman

Cyburbian
Messages
9,244
Points
32
Nothing I said, but I interrupted our staff meeting one morning with an audible hicup that turned into a loud belch. :-D :-c

I'm still laughing about that one.

I guess I just now told a coworker, who has been with the city for 30 years, that Kip Winger (of the band Winger) went to my high school many years before I attended. He asked what Winger was, and I said they sang about statutory rape, as I referred to the song She's Only Seventeen. He qucikly fled the scene.

And I am off. I need to get that "eye-opener" that I missed this morning. :b:
 
Messages
5,352
Points
31
During an impromptu in-office luncheon with all of my coworkers, one of the secretaries kept raving about how much she loved military men. I made a comment about staying away from Marines because I heard they were the craziest of the bunch. After that slipped out, I noticed that the boss gave me an overexaggerated shocked look. I then realized that he was one of the crazy bunch. Given that I was still new to the company, I was quite embarrassed, but he was cool with it. :-$
 

Zoning Goddess

Cyburbian
Messages
13,852
Points
39
New to this jurisdiction, I was chatting with another, more senior, planner about finishing my Master's which had been previously interrupted. She suggested I look into "XXX" University, which operates out of an office building in Orlando. I said nah, I'd want to go to a "real" college. She said "XXX is where I got my degree". Whoops. She's now assistant county manager and just started speaking to me again a couple of years ago.

I saw the mayor of our town, who's also a big developer, at a student show at my son's school. The next week, at a County Commission meeting, I asked him how many grandchildren he had at the school. Unfortunately, he had been there to watch his daughters with the second, trophy wife. Glad he thought that was funny.
 

kjel

Super Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
12,485
Points
41
I worked as an intern for the Main Street program in the city where I attend school. The county manager left a Word document open on my computer and I looked at it to determine whether or not to save it or discard it. It said "Notice of Pubic Hearing." The problem was he had posted about 20 of them around the building so I had to tell him "Umm....did you actually read what your notice said because you have an error." He was horrified to say the least, but it was funny!
 

Rem

Cyburbian
Messages
1,523
Points
23
Not me but one of my daughters .....

We were on a private holiday in New Zealand and visiting Rotorua. I have work contacts in NZ and was going to catch up with the Mayor the 2nd day of the stay. On the first day of the stay we were in a supermarket buying groceries and bumped in to the Lady Mayoress - a very lovely lady. We had a chat and she tried to make small talk with the kids, "what do you think of Rotorua?" she asked "It's a bit stinky" answered my middle child. (Rotorua has a lot of hot springs and a pervading sulphur smell). She took it on the chin but the Mayor and GM made me squirm the next day when we attended a reception in the Mayor's Office - it was good natured though.
 

Gedunker

Moderating
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
11,485
Points
41
I was leading a walking tour of our historic downtown shortly after I came to work here. Pointing out architectural styles and features, talking about good urban design, that sort of thing. We came to a bank that had bricked the entire facade of a three-story building and left gun-slits for windows on the first (ground) floor. There was no surface relief of the bricks, nothing to give it the slightest visual interest, no relationship to its neighbors. I was pretty hard on it and pointed out that a local historic district could have prevented such a "travesty".

One of the participants then pointed out the architect and vice-president of the bank amongst those walking with me. :-$

The v-p and I have since gotten past it: the architect thinks I'm the devil incarnate. Our downtown is now in a local historic district, btw.
 

Planit

Cyburbian
Messages
13,144
Points
54
I told one citizen that I couldn't answer her question, but I could tell her where to go. She didn't catch it, so I keep going with the information, but laughed when she left.
 

imaplanner

Cyburbian
Messages
6,673
Points
27
I was typing at my desk with my headphones on and sort of rocking out- we'll let's just say the burrito I had for lunch was trying to digest- and I let one rip without thinking about it. I immediately knew it was a loud one and pulled my headphones off and the office was SUPER quiet even though everyone was in their cubes. :-$ :-$
 

luckless pedestrian

Super Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
12,466
Points
54
once at a Planning Board meeting in my last town, they were discussing the agenda, one item was the Planning Director's report which I give - so when we were discussing it, I said "So, do you want to do me first?" - I looked up and immediately knew what I said and the person across from me was a Board member (male) about my age who immediately got the joke and had a slight smirk on his face so I immediately looked down and it took every ounce of consciousness in me to not laugh at my own joke

Last night at my newly televised Planning Board meeitng one of the board members was a little punchy so I asked him jokingly what he had for lunch - luckily he continued laughing but I immediately winced knowing I was on TV.
 

Floridays

Cyburbian
Messages
769
Points
21
I was talking to a developer on the phone, we were making small talk...he asked me about something, I don't remember what, and I responded with some smartass remark about "needing to get my kneepads out." I was mortified! I couldn't believe it came out of my mouth; I didn't even KNOW this guy. :-$

The next day, I am called to the counter and the customer standing there asked me if "I'd found my kneepads yet." Then he just roared. Thank God he had a sense of humor!
 

Suburb Repairman

moderator in moderation
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
7,414
Points
34
Floridays said:
I was talking to a developer on the phone, we were making small talk...he asked me about something, I don't remember what, and I responded with some smartass remark about "needing to get my kneepads out." I was mortified! I couldn't believe it came out of my mouth; I didn't even KNOW this guy. :-$

The next day, I am called to the counter and the customer standing there asked me if "I'd found my kneepads yet." Then he just roared. Thank God he had a sense of humor!
That just jogged my memory. During the NBA Finals last year we had a party at work to watch the game. We were watching the game and tend to get a little vocal and yell at sports on TV. :-$ Well, this Ref made a really bad call and I forgot that I was sitting amongst my co-workers and the city manager. I blurted out "Get off your knees Ref, you're blowing the game!!!" All of the cops and folks from my department were cracking up, but my city manager didn't get it. So not only did I make the remark, I had to explain the humor of it to my boss (who laughed once she understood).

I've also made inappropriate comments in class, but my friend was far worse. My geology professor was about 30 years old and a single, decent looking guy. Some buddies & I were at the local bar next to campus, and our professor walked in with this hottie that turned out to be a date. The next day in class he remarked that he ran into us at the bar before heading back to his place. Some of the students snickered about him taking her to his place. He was going over traits of minerals and discussing Mohs Hardness Scale. One of my moron friends raised his hand and said, "So, where did she rank on Mohs Hardness Scale". The class totally erupted with laughter and he could barely finish his lecture with a straight face.
 

CCMNUT39

Cyburbian
Messages
256
Points
10
The best one I can think of was when I was taking a Computer Class in College. The room was PACKED. 40+ people and we were going over on how to create spreadsheets and we had chosen music as one of the categories...

One of the suggestions was R. Kelly's 12-play as a entry. The instructor asked what the hell 12-play was and I piped up with "It's 4-play times 3! The place was rolling. Even the instructor had to stop because he was bent over laughing so hard. Just one of those things where the mouth engages before the brain does.
 

SkeLeton

Cyburbian
Messages
4,853
Points
26
Sadly... I have no funny, embarassing or innapropriate things I've said... my lovely selective memory has deleted all of them and I cant remember.. Yay! :D Although I constantly say innapropriate things... just ask my girlfriend..:-$ :p

Now maybe if I concentrate I may remember something..... the only thing that comes to mind is probably one of the most typical things... saying mom to your teacher in kidergarden or something... :p :-D Not very original... and of course not work related. :p
 
Messages
7,649
Points
29
When my husband was the Seargent In Charge of First Platoon, I mixed that up and it came out "my husband, the First Seargent..." (or something like that). :-$ EDIT: That was while speaking on behalf of the Family Support Group (as an official representative) and addressing the entire unit and their families at a company function. :-|






(For the non-military folks, that was like verbally promoting him from E-7 to E-8 and putting him in charge of the entire Company. :-o )
 

Trail Nazi

Cyburbian
Messages
2,779
Points
24
All I know is that the inappropriate things some of my bosses have said are going to come up during my subpoena for a land use law suit so I am really sweating about having a job after next Wednesday. :-{ :-( :-@
 

Otis

Cyburbian
Messages
5,169
Points
29
I was teaching a class in administrative law at Penn State and was describing how regulations are used to set limits on what you are allowed to do. What I meant to say was that regulations are used to circumscribe your activities. What came out was that they are used to circumsize you.:-$ :-$ :-$

The class was laughing so hard I couldn't hear a thing, but I could read the lips of one student who was saying "look how red he is." :-$ :-$ :-$ :-$ :-$
 

sisterceleste

Cyburbian
Messages
1,519
Points
22
One Minute Man

At a former place I worked I was talking to my consultant project manager and I commented wrongly on my new big boss. Instead of saying he was one that used the "One Minute Manager" approach to management, I said he was a "One Minute Man".
Then I realized what I said. :-@ :-@ :-@
 
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