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Happy Happy Joy Joy (Developer Euphemisms)

BKM

Cyburbian
Messages
6,463
Points
29
My hometown is not proposing just another bland, boring office park for its new Sprawl Valley project. No, indeed, what they are providing is a BUSINESS VILLAGE. After all, Vacaville has over 100,000 people. Why not continue to pretend that we are a "village" and that a collection of shopping centers and office buildings 5 miles from town are part of the "small town."?
 

BKM

Cyburbian
Messages
6,463
Points
29
And, what I really like is the development standards for this "Business Village" require 40 foot setbacks from all roads. 40 foot setbacks just shout "village" to me :)
 

Zoning Goddess

Cyburbian
Messages
13,852
Points
39
OK, our commission just approved a "conservation village". This means sticking 4 units per acre in a mosquito-infested, floodprone, rural area. But hey, they're "clustering" the units out of the alligator-infested wetlands. Never mind that the roads to the site are maybe 18 feet wide and there is no ROW to improve them, oh, and there are humongous ditches right off the travel lanes. Oh, and the one anomaly in the area, approved over the old-timers' objections years ago, is full of gross beige McMansions that are slowly sinking into the muck...
 

BKM

Cyburbian
Messages
6,463
Points
29
At least your McMansions are sinking. Our abominations will be there on the ridgetops until an earthquake shakes them down. :) (I am sounding like Super Amputee Cat here, but godalmighty, the new "executive housing" in Vacaville is just so very, very bad. Especially when compared with the diverse, lovely (Victorian-to-Craftsman-to-Mid Century Modern) stuff in the old part of town.

I am pretty catholic in my architecture tastes, so its not that I like only one kind of house design. These monsters are just cheap and cheesy looking. I just can't understand how so much money can pursue so little taste. And, sure enough, the Sprawl Valley Specific Plan has as a primary objective getting more "executive housing" in Vacaville. As if that's the biggest housing issue facing the City. And, the development team that is pursuing the project has not produced anything I find attractive in the County (they have a horrid golf course community in Vallejo-imagine a five mile loop road lined with one stucco "upscale" tract home after another-and hillside grading and cuts done so badly they make your eyes ache). Not very promising.

I love being able to rant like this-because I don't work for Vacaville! :)
 

Tranplanner

maudit anglais
Messages
7,903
Points
35
We had an architect at a public meeting go on and on about a "vehicular access strategy" for a new waterfront development. He was talking about a road.
 

H

Cyburbian
Messages
2,850
Points
24
How about the ‘Planned Development’?

“If that is a ‘planned development’ sir, then I would hate to see your developments that are NOT planned! :p
 

Gedunker

Moderating
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
11,374
Points
38
Proposed Business in the Village

Yes, BKM, I'd like to apply for a sign permit for my planned business in the Vacaville Business Village:

"Ye Olde Segway Sales and Service Shoppe at Vacaville Business Village"

Ye approve, aye?
 

Chet

Cyburbian Emeritus
Messages
10,624
Points
34
BKM said:
I am pretty catholic in my architecture tastes, so its not that I like only one kind of house design.
Does that mean you encourage the use of flying butresses? ;)
 
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