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Happy homemakers

DA Monkey

Cyburbian
Messages
84
Points
4
I found this in one of our national newspapers and thought it may generate some interesting opinions. :|



Eager beavers so nice to come home to

January 22, 2003

C---. C---. C---. C---. Don't the women of Australia have anything better to think about? Tasmanian anti-discrimination commissioner Jocelynne Scutt, for example (Opinion, January 21). Who does this dusky vagina think she is, wasting valuable newspaper space arguing that Darren Lehmann's recent outburst was sexist as well as racist.

What this swarthy map of Tassie should remember is that sportsmen call each other ebony beavers all the time. That's their job. In fact sportsmen who fail to accuse each other of being sooty front bums on a regular basis may very well be ineligible for professional competition.

Scutt's silly obsession is a prime example of why this country is facing a fertility crisis. After all, the latest reproduction news is that Generation X men are shunning fatherhood – presumably so they don't end up chained to a harpy who won't stop whingeing about the politics of her genitalia.

Clearly there is only one solution to this heinous problem. And that solution is: The Good Wife's Guide from the May 1955 edition of Housekeeping Monthly.

If modern women adopted a few of the trusty techniques of their 1950s sistren, they'd have no trouble keeping their men around long enough to cop a good, hard insemination.

Greeting the master of the house at the end of the working day, for instance. Housekeeping Monthly recommends re-cleaning the house, lighting a fire, putting a ribbon in your hair and preparing a delicious meal (hopefully something containing both choko and white sauce).

"His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it," the journal reads sternly. "After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction."

If you are already blessed with little ones, ensure they are not marinating in melted chocolate and pet vomit: "They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part."

Once your husband makes his big entrance, arrange his pillow, offer to take off his shoes and let him talk first ("his topics of conversation are more important than yours"). And never, ever complain – even if he comes home late or stays out all night:

"Remember he is the master of the house and . . . you have no right to question him. A good wife always knows her place."
 

El Feo

Cyburbian
Messages
674
Points
19
powerplan said:
I found this in one of our national newspapers and thought it may generate some interesting opinions. :|

Eager beavers so nice to come home to

Clearly there is only one solution to this heinous problem. And that solution is: The Good Wife's Guide from the May 1955 edition of Housekeeping Monthly.
This is funny, as far as contemporary feminist screeds go, but - our Aussie friends do realize that "The Good Wife's Guide from the May 1955 edition of Housekeeping Monthly" is bogus, right? ;)
 

DA Monkey

Cyburbian
Messages
84
Points
4
Re: Re: Happy homemakers

El Feo said:


This is funny, as far as contemporary feminist screeds go, but - our Aussie friends do realize that "The Good Wife's Guide from the May 1955 edition of Housekeeping Monthly" is bogus, right? ;)
I had no idea it was a bogus magazine reference, my only thoughts were very superficial in that I thought the article itself was a bit of a laugh.

Still, that was an interesting site reference to urban legends, I will have to explore it a little, tah.
 
Messages
3,690
Points
27
Hee! one of my favorite salvation army finds was a book called "Always Ask a Man", that was a 1960's era dissertation about how if a woman is uncertain if an outfit or hairstyle is most effectively showcasing her beauty, she should ask a man, because they are the ultimate authority on female beauty. and it really did contain gems about making sure the house was picked up and kids behaving and blah blah blah. i wish i could remember where i put it.
 
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