I've been active on match.com for a while. Like many here, I'm at a strange age where I'm too old for the bar scene, but too young for the organized singles activity scene. Most friends and acquaintences are married, and the social networks that could be taken advantage of at a younger age (college classes, etc) aren't there anymore.
My experience with online dating has been mixed, but I can say that if it wasn't for that, I'd probably be dating far less. I'm a bit shy, and it's difficult for me to make cold calls of attractive women in supermarkets, stors and so on.
My major peeves with online dating:
Misrepresentation. I've been communicating with a wonderful woman who classified herself as having an "average" weight in her online profile. However, when we met, she definitely wasn't my idea of average; I'd put her at a US size 16 or 18. Personality-wise, we hit if off, but she was larger than me; I just couldn't find myself physically attracted to her.
Many women online misrepresent their apperarance, specifically weight. Most on-line dating services have weight categories; slim/slender, athletic, average, a few extra pounds, and large. Some overweight women classify themselves as "average," to increase the pool of prospective matches, or because they believe it's not a misrepresentation; that the average woman is overweight. A few will lie with the hopes that a man will "see the beauty underneath the surface" when they meet.
My experience with the classifications have been:
Classification: Slim/slender
What men think of in real life: thin or petite
What men expect online: thin or petite
Reality online: petite to WPTH
Classification: Athletic/toned
What men think of in real life: very fit thin/petite to WPTH
What men expect online: very fit thin/petite to WPTH
Reality online: very fit thin/petite to WPTH, stocky rugby player
Classification: Average
What men think of in real life: WPTH
What men expect online: WPTH ± 10-15 pounds
Reality online: slim/slender to smaller BBW
Classification: A few extra pounds
What men think of in real life: WPTH +10-15 pounds
What men expect online: smaller BBW (US size 14-18), stocky rugby player
Reality online: smaller BBW to obese
Classification: Large
What men think of in real life: BBW to obese
What men expect online: obese
Reality online: obese
Many men avoid answering women's profiles without photos, with photos in concealing or baggy clothing, or face shots only. ("Fat girl angle shots.") They've had experiences meeting "average" women with the bodies of Rosie O'Donnell or Camryn Manheim, and they don't want to get burned again.
According to my female friends, men misrepresent themselves by fudging their accomplishments, achievements or career. Many online profiles have income groups, and some men will classify themselves in the next higher income bracket. Others use pictures next to houses, cars and other belongings that they don't own. While women sometimes misrepresent their appearance, men in equal numbers misrepresent attributes relating to their ability to be good providers. Like women, men do it to increase the prospective dating pool; many women's profiles have very high minimum income requirements. .
Some men misrepresent their height. Looking at female profiles, only a small minority of women are looking for men that are shorter than the average height for men in the US (5'9"). A good number of women have a minimum 6' cutoff, even if they're 5' 4" or 5' 5" themselves. Like larger women, men will sometimes add a couple of inches to their height to increase their prospective online dating pool, quality of matches and response rate.
Dan's tidbit of advice #1 - BE HONEST ABOUT YOUR BODY TYPE IN YOUR PROFILE.
More later ... I'm working, and I don't want to post a very long message that can't be easily absorbed.