Some good news to end an otherwise tragic week

[Dan]

Sure, we mourned the loss of President Reagan.

We felt empty when we heard the news that Ray Charles passed away.

Despite a challenging week, at least there's some good news to look forward to. It's an event the whole world has been eagerly awaiting ...

Mary-Kate and Ashley will be having their 18th birthday tomorrow.

 

[freewaytincan]

Sure, we mourned the loss of President Reagan.

We felt empty when we heard the news that Ray Charles passed away.

Despite a challenging week, at least there's some good news to look forward to. It's an event the whole world has been eagerly awaiting ...

Mary-Kate and Ashley will be having their 18th birthday tomorrow.

Wow. I should meet them sometime, and be like, "Hey, you two were born only a couple of months after me...and now it's legal...wanna-" and proceed to get escorted out of the area.

I have a sick fascination with offending celebs. It's my...thing to do...

 

[Zoning Goddess]

OK....... Dan, is this why you seem to think the women in your age group on match.com are a little "dowdy"? ;-)

 

[Chet]

Good God they sure turned out to be little tramps!

On the bright side, my death pool is looking better. (20 people each put $100 in a kitty, and make a list of 10 names. The one with the most deaths wins all. There are bonus points and tie breakers too - youngest death, etc.)

 

[AubieTurtle]

I just don't get the level of craziness over these two. Yeah, they look nice, but aren't better than what you'll see at the local mall. Of course girls at the mall don't have enough money to hire people who can make ex-boyfriends disappear off the face of the earth if they make the them unhappy.

 

[Super Amputee Cat]

The Olsen twins have been the pimple on the a$$ of the entertainment industry for over 15 years now. They got their start on that lowbrow turdfest Full House and since then have become the darlings of the dumb soccer mom set who are wishing their teenage daughters will turn out just like Kate and Ashley: Shallow, materialistic, consumerist fashion slaves.

The Olsen Twins have masterminded one of the biggest scams in the entertainment industry. To make money, by selling themselves as products to suburban consumers to the tune of millions. And as long as there are enough undiscriminating fans and brain-dead parents out there who buy into it, they will continue to rake in the green.

However, the Olsens have reached a transition point in their lives. They are now about 17 and can no longer sustain or continue their so-called G-Rated image that they have peddled for years. Now they are wearing tighter clothes, wearing more makeup, and wooing beady-eyed N' Suck Wanna Be's in their movies. Its just a matter of time before they go the Britney Spears route and start peddling soft core porn.

But that was really their destiny all along. To prostitute themselves to the almighty dollar by catering to a sexually obsessed materialistic culture. The innocious G-rated stuff was just a charade.

And they smell like TV.

 

[el Guapo]

....Its just a matter of time before they go the Britney Spears route and start peddling soft core porn....But that was really their destiny all along. To prostitute themselves to the almighty dollar by catering to a sexually obsessed materialistic culture....

OK...let's get it going girls...let's see some Britney action....my Cialis only lasts 3 days...

 

[Dan]

OK...let's get it going girls...let's see some Britney action....my Cialis only lasts 3 days...

 

[Super Amputee Cat]

I find that commercial as creepy as Hell. That Bob guy gives me the willies. :-#

 

[freewaytincan]

OK...let's get it going girls...let's see some Britney action....my Cialis only lasts 3 days...

Why? Why? I'm never going to sleep again...

 

[Miles Ignatius]

How Many Indignities Must We Endure?

.....You haven't heard? The Olsen twins will be joing "Bob" for a future menage-a-tres Cialis marketing campaign. It's a classic example of bridging generations to reach a wider demographic..... :-D

 

[Zoning Goddess]

According to CNN today, the Olsen Twins' combined net worth is $300 million.

 

[freewaytincan]

According to CNN today, the Olsen Twins' combined net worth is $300 million.

It's more than that.

 

[michaelskis]

According to CNN today, the Olsen Twins' combined net worth is $300 million.

*bad thoughts bad thoughts bad thoughts...

Ok, I am better now. I will admit to having the cover of esqire mag from when Britney was on it as my laptop wall paper.

 

[el Guapo]

I find that commercial as creepy as Hell. That Bob guy gives me the willies. :-#

No sir, not the plural of Willies, just one, and from what I hear, it is a hell of a unit.

 

[JNA]

eG
You crack me up LMAO :-}

 

[Gedunker]

They are matriculating at Columbia University, if memory serves. An Ivy League institution. Isn't that the same league as our current and two past presidents?

Hmmm. Might we have a Hillary/Mary Kate and Ashley ticket in 2012?

You know, two vice-presidents for the price of one ;-)

 

[Seabishop]

You people just don't appreciate talent. All the greats are spurned by society because the masses are not ready for their art. Perhaps the world is not ready to confront the truths inherent in the core of their body of work? Their film New York Minute is a shocking look at contemporary society and the perils of life in our modern age. At its conclusion you will leave the theater exploring key questions of God, love, and death. Their new album is a masterwork of stunning clarity - the new standard by which all musical art will now be judged!

 

[GeogPlanner]

isn't he from the early years of MadTV?

 

[otterpop]

The Olsen Twins' phenomenal success. The Royal Order of the Gutter Rats strikes again. (See post on Frats and Secret Societies).

Gotta give them this: as froggy looking as they were as toddlers, they have turned out nice.

I predict these girls have just about run their string. Poor things. Their twinness will be more of a liability than an asset in the future. Successful solo careers seem doubtful. Guess their fabulous wealth can soften the blow.

 

[Downtown]

I did hear that after the Bomb of New York Minute that Mary Kate and Ashley will be "pursuing their own projects".

 

[freewaytincan]

The Olsen Twins' phenomenal success. The Royal Order of the Gutter Rats strikes again. (See post on Frats and Secret Societies).

Gotta give them this: as froggy looking as they were as toddlers, they have turned out nice.

I predict these girls have just about run their string. Poor things. Their twinness will be more of a liability than an asset in the future. Successful solo careers seem doubtful. Guess their fabulous wealth can soften the blow.

They still look odd. Unattractive, even. I may be jaded, though. I have lived in North Texas since birth.

 

[Maister]

I predict these girls have just about run their string. Poor things. Their twinness will be more of a liability than an asset in the future. Successful solo careers seem doubtful. Guess their fabulous wealth can soften the blow.

Yeah, you're probably right. I see a number of ill-fated projects in the near future. An abortive attempt at a recording career...maybe a book that will bomb.....maybe a couple of movies featuring them solo - but they'll tank....of course there will be the inevitable attempts to 'prove they're grownups' by modeling in a men's mag.
But in the end I'm sure they'll end up having to take solace in the fact that they never need to work another day in their gilded lives.