• Ongoing coronavirus / COVID-19 discussion: how is the pandemic affecting your community, workplace, and wellness? 🦠

    Working from home? So are we. Come join us! Cyburbia is a friendly big tent, where we share our experiences and thoughts about urban planning practice, planning adjacent topics, and whatever else comes to mind. No ads, no spam, no social distancing.

Suggestions for good wedding gifts

Hceux

Cyburbian
Messages
1,028
Points
22
As inspired by the thread on the bad wedding gifts, I wonder if you people would suggest good wedding gifts.

Why do I bother? Well, I have been invited to a wedding to my step-sister who I'm not even close to, which makes my task a bit harder. I have never attended a wedding before. And, I believe, I am expected to get a gift of some kind and I haven't gotten a clue of what to purchase. I don't want to be one of those people who buys the newlyweds their 77th toaster, 32nd pair of salt and pepper shakers, 18th set of pots and pans, etc.

Something cool, useful, and long-lasting would be good to give away.

And why do we need to buy wedding gifts for newlyweds? Where did this come from? Would it have been even more liberating for the newlyweds to purchase whatever they want instead of taking in 'donated' goods from families and friends?
 

Chet

Cyburbian Emeritus
Messages
10,623
Points
34
Hceux said:
And why do we need to buy wedding gifts for newlyweds? Where did this come from? Would it have been even more liberating for the newlyweds to purchase whatever they want instead of taking in 'donated' goods from families and friends?
And this is exactly why the best gift is MONEY
 

Zoning Goddess

Cyburbian
Messages
13,852
Points
39
Aren't they registered anywhere for gifts? Ask the bride's mother or sister, if that's possible. If so, you can look them up on the store's internet site, see what they want, and see what hasn't yet been purchased for them.

If that's not an option, take Chet's advice: a check or gift card in any amount you're comfortable with. You would have to know one or both of them pretty well to find something cool and long-lasting that they would appreciate.

In either case, don't take the gift to the wedding. It should be delivered to the home of the bride's mother, or to the bride herself, prior to the wedding.
 

spokanite

Cyburbian
Messages
202
Points
9
I once bought a garden hose...hey, it was on the registry. I've also purchased some nice hand-made windchimes, and magazine subscriptions if i know what they enjoy. A few times I have purchased tickets to a local playhouse. I'm not a fan of just buying them something and then a few years from now it breaks and ends up getting thrown out with the trash.

Brian
 

el Guapo

Capitalist
Messages
5,995
Points
31
Booze is always the present of first resort. Even if they are on a 12 step program.
 
Messages
7,649
Points
29
Hceux said:
And why do we need to buy wedding gifts for newlyweds? Where did this come from? Would it have been even more liberating for the newlyweds to purchase whatever they want instead of taking in 'donated' goods from families and friends?
The material wealth and store-based culture you reference in your assumptions didn't exist until very recently. The origins of the wedding shower go back to a time when it was really tough to set up household for a young couple in a more barter-based system. It is the same reason we do baby showers.

Anyway, if you want to do something COOL, you could try to collude with other family members and purchase something special on their gift registry that one of you alone could not afford. My sister's coworkers colluded and she got one place setting of silverware from everyone. She ended up with a full set of service for 12, including some of the fancy serving pieces.

I have also seen this done for baby showers to make sure they had some of the big-ticket items like crib, high chair, etc.
 

Gedunker

Moderating
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
11,487
Points
41
Best gift idea: Brass door knocker -- for their first home together (awwwwww).
Engraved with their new surname (awwwwwwwww)
Bonus points if you find one with some image that means something to them as a couple (say, sailboat or lighthouse, or what have you). (awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww)

You are out about $25.00 US. Durable, personal, and extremely unlikely to be duplicated. :-D
 

Lee Nellis

Cyburbian
Messages
1,369
Points
29
Unless they are young folks who haven't established a household or households they will combine, money is the best choice.
 

Floridays

Cyburbian
Messages
769
Points
21
I try to be a little creative and usually don't follow a gift registry. One of my favorite gifts is a set of really pretty windchimes.
If I don't know them really well...which sometimes makes me wonder why I'm even bothering :-\ ...a nice bottle of wine in a basket with a couple of "fun" wine glasses from Pier 1.
 

jmf

Cyburbian
Messages
594
Points
17
Since you don't know them well, if they are registered, stick to the registry. Also, if the wedding is a long way from where they live - have the gift delivered to their home or a store in their area where they can pick it up - this is especially easy if they are registered.

My favorite gifts, for the most part, were ones we had registered for: the dishes and cutlery we use everyday - rather than the mish mash we had before we got married; the big towels I would never have splurged on myself and, believe it or not, the shop vac!
 
Messages
3,690
Points
27
We almost always give a check, because it is much easier to bring than hauling in a gift to the reception. We only buy off the registry if they are registered at someplace where we'll get a percentage in our Upromise account for Jack, a la Bed Bath and Beyond. The only time I go off the registry is when I know them really well.

However, one of the really cool things that I have seen done is having their wedding invitation framed. Very cool, and usually greatly appreciated.
 

mendelman

Unfrozen Caveman Planner
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
13,908
Points
57
I shall echo the "money" gift option. Unless they are independently wealthy already, they will surely appreciate cash.

I know I did.
 
Messages
5,352
Points
31
If you can't purchase something from their registry, then give money or a gift card to a store where they are most likely to get some use out of it.
 
Messages
7,649
Points
29
Downtown said:
However, one of the really cool things that I have seen done is having their wedding invitation framed. Very cool, and usually greatly appreciated.
Yes, those gifts with that personal touch can be very special and treasured.

This is not something you can do unless you know them well, but I took the flowers that my sister wore in her wedding and I dried them for her. She still has them. I also heard once of someone taking some roses from the wedding decorations (or something) rooting them and growing a dozen rose bushes from a dozen long-stemmed roses to give to them for their first anniversary (or some such). I think that is quite magical.
 

Hceux

Cyburbian
Messages
1,028
Points
22
Mastiff said:
Pron for the honeymoon...

You just can't go wrong with pron!
When I first looked at your post, I thought to myself and silently said the word "pron?" Then, it hit to me. Prongs! Ha ha ha...thanks for the unintended laugh.

Excellent idea considering that the newlyweds are off to Germany, I believe, for their honeymoon.

Keep the suggestions rolling...this is great!
 
Messages
7,649
Points
29
Hceux said:
When I first looked at your post, I thought to myself and silently said the word "pron?" Then, it hit to me. Prongs! Ha ha ha...thanks for the unintended laugh.
Um, I have no idea what pron is but I somehow don't think he meant what you think he meant. Perhaps Mastiff will kindly enlighten us, assuming it is a Work Safe explanation. 8-!

(maybe "porn"??)
 
Messages
5,352
Points
31
Hceux said:
When I first looked at your post, I thought to myself and silently said the word "pron?" Then, it hit to me. Prongs! Ha ha ha...thanks for the unintended laugh.

Excellent idea considering that the newlyweds are off to Germany, I believe, for their honeymoon.

Keep the suggestions rolling...this is great!

Umm....that's not what he means. Try rearranging the "r" and "o." It's another inside-Cyburbia misspelling joke. ;)
 

Mastiff

Gunfighter
Messages
7,181
Points
30
Planderella said:
Umm....that's not what he means. Try rearranging the "r" and "o." It's another inside-Cyburbia misspelling joke. ;)

Not just an inside joke... Some servers, I'm told, can catch words like that. So, pron it is!
 

donk

Cyburbian
Messages
6,970
Points
30
My typical gift is pottery or some other locally produced craft or piece of art. I've gotten the reputation as a good gift giver, and people have even told me they wished they had invited me to their wedding for the gift factor.
 

biscuit

Cyburbian
Messages
3,904
Points
25
After spending the beter part of the past four days going through wedding gifts all I have to say is... PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD EITHER STICK TO THE REGISTRY OR GIVE MONEY!

We were fortunate enough to have gotten almost everything we registered for and eneded up with a lot of extra gifts we either didn't need/want/like or already had. It was a giant pain in the rear trying to figure out where to return the extras that wen't on one of our registry lists, and some things couldn't be returned at all. Speaking of which...does anybody out there need a deep fryer that Target hasn't carried on it's shelves in over five years? :-D
 
Top