• We're a fun, friendly, and diverse group of planners, placemakers, built environment shapers, students, and other folks who found their people here. Create your FREE Cyburbia ID, and join us today! Register through your Reddit, Facebook, Google, Twitter, or Microsoft account, or use your email address.

The NEVERENDING Dating Thread

Whose Yur Planner

Cyburbian
Messages
10,492
Points
33
That right there is when you know how long it should be...
Given our long and tortured history filled with break ups and reconciliations, perhaps it was acknowledgement that needed to happen. Plus I have friends and family members that will do an involuntary commit if we got back together.
 

MD Planner

Cyburbian
Messages
1,934
Points
25
There's no set amount of time you have to wait. It also depends on what you're looking for. And keep this in mind; many times the relationship is already over you just don't know it yet, i.e. you're still together but . . . .
 

kjel

Super Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
12,062
Points
33
For those who know me IRL, know that my fiancé and I broke up about two months ago. My question is how long after the break up of a serious relationship should you wait before you start dating again? I have read that you should not date for as long as you were in the relationship. In my case, that will 5-6 months.
I will say the first month was pretty much a living hell. However, it did make me take step back and take a hard look at some things. It also resulted in me decamping to my folks place in Texas for about 4 days. What brought the question up was that there is a woman at the Y who has been trying to catch my attention. I finally broke down and started talking to her. There was enough interest shown to at least keep talking to her. We shall see. If nothing else, it was an acknowledgement that things between my ex fiancé and I are finally, truly over.
Sorry to hear this. I don't think there's a hard time limit. I think self reflection is important and that may take a little time, but do what feels right to you.
 

Whose Yur Planner

Cyburbian
Messages
10,492
Points
33
Sorry to hear this. I don't think there's a hard time limit. I think self reflection is important and that may take a little time, but do what feels right to you.
Thanks, again, given our history of break ups and reconciliations, it wasn't unexpected. That history also haunted the relationship this time. Basically, always waiting for the phone call, ended it yet again. It also gets back to the adage that if hasn't worked in the past, there might be reason, not compatible, different goals, money, etc.
 

Gedunker

Moderating
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
11,054
Points
34
Thanks, again, given our history of break ups and reconciliations, it wasn't unexpected. That history also haunted the relationship this time. Basically, always waiting for the phone call, ended it yet again. It also gets back to the adage that if hasn't worked in the past, there might be reason, not compatible, different goals, money, etc.
I always heard that "Lightning doesn't strike the same place twice".
 
Top