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Wedding planning resources

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
Well Elmo and I set a date for our wedding this weekend (March 20, 2005), so now the insanity begins. I know there are quite a few other couples getting ready to take the big plunge, so I was hoping that you could share your resource tips. Any really good wedding planning sites, magazines, etc. that you can recommend? Nine months away seems like a pretty short time...
 

biscuit

Cyburbian
Messages
3,904
Points
25
Congrats, congrats, congrats!!!

Being the groom I'm not really the best source for wedding tips (my participation in the planning didn't go much beyond picking out my own tux). I do know however that the very-soon-to-be Mrs. Biscuit used The Knot for a few ideas, and that she has remarked that hiring a wedding planner would have been well worth the cost. Good Luck....BME is gonna need it ;-)
 
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That time will creep up on you like nobody's business. The Knot and The Wedding Channel are two of the best resources out there. Try not to buy too many bridal magazines. After a while they all start to get really repetitive - same ads, same articles, etc., yet they are very addictive. I can't seem to stop buying them. Also, try to go to as many bridal shows as you can. Not only will you be able to meet a lot of vendors and kill lots of birds with one stone, you'll be able to register for door prizes, free honeymoons, etc. BEK and I have won a few things from some of the shows that we've attended, but we're still waiting on our free honeymoon trip to come through. Happy planning! :)
 

Plannerbabs

Cyburbian
Messages
1,038
Points
23
I found indiebride.com to be a welcome respite from all of the lacy glurge in the other wedding magazines/sites. Also, Martha Stewart Weddings , for relatively glurge-free stuff, although the etiquette recommended is frightening. I wouldn't worry about the wedding planner. We handled ours w/out one, and granted, it would have been nice, but being the control freak I am, and Mr. Plannerbabs being the same way, it probably would have doubled our work. Besides, if you can plan cities, you can plan a wedding. (the hard part is doing it at the same time).
Good luck! The next 9 months will fly by, and during the week leading up to the ceremony, you'll feel as though there are a dozen things that absolutely have to be done. Don't worry about it. At that point, the momentum of the day takes over, and everything will be fine, even if it's not exactly as planned.
:)
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
Lee Nellis said:
Elope now while you still have the chance?
Heh... we were on that track for a LONG time... but we wanted to try to get Elmo's kids involved and that's difficult if it's out of the area. We're doing the next best thing though... a low key wedding at our house. (Plus, that's an excellent reason to repaint the interior of the house this summer... yay... a new nagging tool!)
 

biscuit

Cyburbian
Messages
3,904
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25
Plannerbabs said:
I wouldn't worry about the wedding planner. We handled ours w/out one, and granted, it would have been nice, but being the control freak I am, and Mr. Plannerbabs being the same way, it probably would have doubled our work.
That was my response to the fiancee after telling me a planner would have been nice. She is such a perferctionist and a control freak that that I told her she probably would have fired the poor wedding planner a week into the process. She doesn't always find me very amusing....

One positive that has come from all of her hard work (other than getting to marry me of course :p) is that she has decided on a career change and will now work torwards becoming an event planner. I think she would do a bang-up job of it.
 
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I loved The Knot - and since I got married, they've made all sorts of upgrades. My SIL is using their site to manage the guest list - which is an awesome tool, and task, considering their guests are coming from about 20 states and 2 countries (the Groom is Quebecois).
 

Seabishop

Cyburbian
Messages
3,838
Points
25
Planderella said:
BEK and I have won a few things from some of the shows that we've attended, but we're still waiting on our free honeymoon trip to come through. Happy planning! :)
We won a free honeymoon trip to Bermuda. :)

...and couldn't go because the rules stated we had to use it months before our wedding, and we both couldn't take extra time off from work. :( They weren't very easy to deal with.
 

Habanero

Cyburbian
Messages
3,241
Points
27
Hm, I guess the Knot is okay but beware of the chat areas- it's all blowing sunshine and fake (and then there are the trolls).. but for general info I like the Wedding Channel the best.

You also have a PM... :f:
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
Thanks so much for all the tips! The wedding itself will probably easier than rounding everyone up from all over North America. It's going to be a challenge, but it will be fun to have all of our family in one room! I'll have to check out that guest tracking thing that Downtown was talking about.
 

Tranplanner

maudit anglais
Messages
7,903
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35
Congrats Nerudite!

Mrs. Tranplanner used a Canadian site...babbling brides or something like that. It was okay on getting some tips and background on some perspective vendors (e.g. we were able to find out what DJ NOT to use). Most of the site was pretty glurgy/catty though (from what I say). Mrs. Tranplanner didn't make many friends there, I know that.

We pretty much organized our own wedding and it went alright. It turned out great!
 

BiteMeElmo

Cyburbian
Messages
324
Points
11
nerudite said:
Heh... we were on that track for a LONG time... but we wanted to try to get Elmo's kids involved and that's difficult if it's out of the area. We're doing the next best thing though... a low key wedding at our house. (Plus, that's an excellent reason to repaint the interior of the house this summer... yay... a new nagging tool!)
Yeah, and I can't wait to start nagging her to start that painting....
 

Glasshouse

Cyburbian
Messages
120
Points
6
You guys gotta stop talking about weddings.....My girlfriend see's the word and she goes into a frinzy......I told her why not just cut the program a little and save a few years.....I'll give her all my stuff and move.

Bob
 

Glasshouse

Cyburbian
Messages
120
Points
6
A perfect wedding plan:

Marriage at the court house: $5 ...filling fee

Reception dinner at the service station: $4.50 in burritos

Honeymoon in the car: $9.99 for a good CD

Cold beer in a cooler: Priceless

Bob
 

PlannerByDay

Cyburbian
Messages
1,827
Points
24
Congrats,

As many of you know I recently got engaged in April, our wedding is planned for September 2004, yup 2004. We're in love an don't want to wait, (sorry for getting all mushy and crap on ya) and from what we've heard the the longer the engagement, the more you spend and the more likely you are to change your mind and make the same decision more than once. With our quick schedule, you have to make the decision and go with it or else your outta time.

I don't have any really good tips since I don't know what is in your area. If you want I was in charge of doing a lot of calling and getting info, then I reported back to Ms. PBD and we would select two or 3 people to meet with then make a decision.

If you want to help this was a great way and didn't really require you to make any tough decisions like, colors, flower type and things.

I was responsible for DJ, Photography, Reverand, and Cake. I lined them up, then we visited a few and made a joint decision.

Happy Planning and expect to spend between $20,000 and $25,000 :-c
 

BiteMeElmo

Cyburbian
Messages
324
Points
11
We're using our house as the venue partly to save money. We won't have to pay for a church or a hall that way. We agreed to keep the guest list very small (or else we would definitely need a larger venue), so fortunately we're going to be able to keep it quite modest.

We would like to emphasize, though, that our house will hold MANY gifts, so don't worry about being extravagant when you're shopping for us ;)
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
PlannerByDay said:
Happy Planning and expect to spend between $20,000 and $25,000 :-c
Heh... I'm going to probably get by with 1/10th that cost. It will be a very simple wedding in my house. And only 25 to 30 guests maximum. I'll know everyone at my wedding, and they all know my casual nature. Since this is Canada, I'll have to make sure to keep the bar well-stocked.

The hardest thing to do will be to find a photographer and wedding officiant to marry us at midnight, which is the time of the actual ceremony.
 

Big Easy King

Cyburbian
Messages
1,361
Points
23
Planderella said:
BEK and I have won a few things from some of the shows that we've attended, but we're still waiting on our free honeymoon trip to come through.
Winning prizes rules! I wish that we could also win a nice house. ;-)

Congratulations Nerudite!
 

Habanero

Cyburbian
Messages
3,241
Points
27
nerudite said:
Heh... I'm going to probably get by with 1/10th that cost. It will be a very simple wedding in my house. And only 25 to 30 guests maximum. I'll know everyone at my wedding, and they all know my casual nature. Since this is Canada, I'll have to make sure to keep the bar well-stocked.

The hardest thing to do will be to find a photographer and wedding officiant to marry us at midnight, which is the time of the actual ceremony.
Have a close friend get ordained on the internet and have them marry you, then it's free!

Weddings are expensive. I don't want to even think what we could be doing with the money.. but I'm really glad we'll have that day to look back on (and when else can I wear a beautiful white dress, tiara, and veil?)
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
Habanero said:
Have a close friend get ordained on the internet and have them marry you, then it's free!

Weddings are expensive. I don't want to even think what we could be doing with the money.. but I'm really glad we'll have that day to look back on (and when else can I wear a beautiful white dress, tiara, and veil?)
I've been thinking about that... I went to a friend's wedding once where their friend was ordained, and he did a pretty crappy job at the vows and stuff. Remember Rowan Atkinson from Four Weddings and a Funeral? It was worse than that. So that may be a last ditch effort if we can't find anyone.
 

BiteMeElmo

Cyburbian
Messages
324
Points
11
nerudite said:
I've been thinking about that... I went to a friend's wedding once where their friend was ordained, and he did a pretty crappy job at the vows and stuff. Remember Rowan Atkinson from Four Weddings and a Funeral? It was worse than that. So that may be a last ditch effort if we can't find anyone.
Inside Joke: Pastor Hugo? lol
 

Michele Zone

BANNED
Messages
7,657
Points
29
PlannerByDay said:
Happy Planning and expect to spend between $20,000 and $25,000 :-c
I think my elopement cost about $200. :-D That included the wedding bands, taxi, dinner and a movie. :)

Given my elopement, I am probably the last person on the planet to suggest wedding resources. However, coincidentally, the business website I am overhauling has a lot of customers doing "theme" weddings and she has a page of links. I have been debating all afternoon whether or not to toss this out there because, well, the site isn't ready but my page of her links is a lot better than her page of her links. Anyway, here is the page of links, for whatever it is worth (and I am no judge of their worth, being so NOT into the wedding thing): http://eclogiselle.com/feet/merchants.html (That site is non-functional -- just sample pages. If you actually wanted to purchase anything from her, her website is at: http://www.fancyfeetsandals.com/ )
 

Cardinal

Cyburbian
Messages
10,080
Points
34
Habanero said:
Have a close friend get ordained on the internet and have them marry you, then it's free!
This goes back a couple of years, but I believe several Cyburbians are ordained, including our Great Leader.
 

Trail Nazi

Cyburbian
Messages
2,779
Points
24
Congrats on setting a date. My husband is a professional photojournalist and we used to shoot weddings when we lived in Florida for "mad money". We would always research other photographers using the Knot and use the local wedding guides. Definitely go to the wedding shows in the area b/c they are very useful.

When we were getting married, I loved Martha Stewart Weddings for the ideas.

Good luck on it all.
 

el Guapo

Capitalist
Messages
5,984
Points
29
We are going to India in January where we are going to get hitched Hindu Style (five years after the Pope Style wedding)! Wife says I'm feeding 0.000015% of the population (really) according to the wedding consultat. Got to get me some more rupies!
 

jmf

Cyburbian
Messages
594
Points
17
PlannerByDay said:
Happy Planning and expect to spend between $20,000 and $25,000 :-c
Congrats Nerudite!!!!!!

You can definitely spend 1/10th of this amount. We did the backyard thing with about 50 guests and I would say we were around the 5,000 mark and the biggest portion of that was the food. A friend did the photography. The cake was very simple and done by the same people who catered. The food we splurged on a bit. We couldn't do a sit down meal for 50 in our home so we had significant munchies, sandwiches and salads and smoked salmon (mmmmm).

Having the wedding at home is a great way to motivate yourselves to get all those renovation projects done. We did more work on the house in the 6 month before the wedding than we have done in the three years since. And there is still plenty to do!
 

michaelskis

Cyburbian
Messages
19,708
Points
46
Congrads on the wedding! This is getting scary with everyone getting married. I have two wedding that I am going to, one in July and my cousin is getting married in August. When I was living out east, it was drilled into my head that I was too young to think about marriage (hmm, new thread?) But I know all these people my age or younger now getting married, and it is making me wonder if I will be reading to “settle down” meet the right woman, and move into that next stage of my life? On a side note, when I do get married, I am making my own wedding cake. (yes I can cook!)
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
I have a question for everyone. Would it be a huge travesty if we didn't have a wedding cake? I know it's kind of a tradition to cut the cake/feed each other or whatever. But neither of us really like cake that much. Has anyone been to a wedding where they did something else besides cake? Can you tell I'm not much of a traditionalist?
 

Plannerbabs

Cyburbian
Messages
1,038
Points
23
nerudite said:
I have a question for everyone. Would it be a huge travesty if we didn't have a wedding cake? I know it's kind of a tradition to cut the cake/feed each other or whatever. But neither of us really like cake that much. Has anyone been to a wedding where they did something else besides cake? Can you tell I'm not much of a traditionalist?
I would think it's more of a travesty to have something you don't really like for tradition's sake. I wanted to do a stack of donuts myself, but was vetoed... |-) I think the Martha Stewart wedding magazine had something about a stack of cupcakes, or you could do cookies with initials or something like that.
 

donk

Cyburbian
Messages
6,970
Points
30
On cakes

My mother and step father's wedding they did stawberry short cakes for the dessert. It was strawberry season and my mother made the shortcakes. For about 200 people the whole thing cost about 5K. It was at the farm and was BYOB with some wine provided. I think the most expensive things were the tent rental and the band.
 

biscuit

Cyburbian
Messages
3,904
Points
25
Plannerbabs said:
I would think it's more of a travesty to have something you don't really like for tradition's sake. I wanted to do a stack of donuts myself, but was vetoed... |-) I think the Martha Stewart wedding magazine had something about a stack of cupcakes, or you could do cookies with initials or something like that.
Or if a Krispy Cream happens to open in Alberta between now and the wedding date you could go real high class with one of these.
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
biscuit said:
Or if a Krispy Cream happens to open in Alberta between now and the wedding date you could go real high class with one of these.
LOL... uhhhh... thanks! ;) We have a krispy kreme here. I'm not a big donut fan either, believe it or not. I'll have to think of some other type of desserty type items. I like the shortcake idea donk... yum!
 

jmf

Cyburbian
Messages
594
Points
17
Nerudite -

This is your day - do whatever you want! We did a cake but it was a very light lemony cake - a lot people said it was the best wedding cake they had ever had. It also was very plain looking.... I know the picture is dark but...

 
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22
Have a destination wedding!! I think they're called 'wedding-moons'. The future Mrs. ...Star and I are going to Negril, Jamaica for our wedding in a few weeks. Then we're ditching everybody who is coming with us, and going to Ochos Rios for a few more days. All-inclusive is the only way to go in my opinion.
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
the north omaha star said:
Have a destination wedding!! I think they're called 'wedding-moons'. The future Mrs. ...Star and I are going to Negril, Jamaica for our wedding in a few weeks. Then we're ditching everybody who is coming with us, and going to Ochos Rios for a few more days. All-inclusive is the only way to go in my opinion.
That was our original idea. But once we decided that we wanted to have Elmo's kids involved with the wedding (8 and 11 y.o.), that was pretty much out of the question due to cost and getting permission to get them out of the country. Otherwise, I would have been going to Jamaica too. Sandals Negril! It looks amazing...
 

BiteMeElmo

Cyburbian
Messages
324
Points
11
nerudite said:
That was our original idea. But once we decided that we wanted to have Elmo's kids involved with the wedding (8 and 11 y.o.), that was pretty much out of the question due to cost and getting permission to get them out of the country. Otherwise, I would have been going to Jamaica too. Sandals Negril! It looks amazing...
We could still do that *after* the wedding. Is it in bad taste to ask for money as a wedding gift?
 
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BiteMeElmo said:
We could still do that *after* the wedding. Is it in bad taste to ask for money as a wedding gift?
The ole etiquette biddies say that it is but I much rather receive money than 12 cheap ass toasters.
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
Planderella said:
The ole etiquette biddies say that it is but I much rather receive money than 12 cheap ass toasters.
Heh... yeah no doubt! They actually have honeymoon wedding registries around. I may consider that in lieu of gifts, especially since most of my guests will be from the States so it would be difficult to register with a store down there. I guess I could register up here, but then guests would need to purchase a gift while in town which would be a pain too.
 

Rem

Cyburbian
Messages
1,524
Points
23
Congratulations nerudite and elmo.

DIY and personal touches are the key to a cheap, stylish wedding - you guys seem to be well endowed with both so it's looking good.
 

JNA

Cyburbian Plus
Messages
25,063
Points
54
Taken from the AP Wire June 9, 2004:

Woman Claims to Have Longest Bridal Veil
KORNEUBURG, Austria -- Here comes the bride, and there goes her veil -- all 1.7 miles of it. Eva Hofbauer went to her wedding on Wednesday claiming to be wearing the longest bridal veil in the world, the Austria Press Agency reported.

Her groom could only watch, robbed of any attention, as Hofbauer was assisted by hundreds of young people who carried the veil into the church in Korneuburg, a town on the Danube River just northwest of Vienna.

Mayor Wolfgang Peterl said he hoped the veil would earn a place in the Guinness Book of Records. The previous record-holder was said to be a Japanese bride whose veil was 1.2 miles long.
______________________________

Q. So what are you planning to claim as notable at your wedding ?
 

Habanero

Cyburbian
Messages
3,241
Points
27
nerudite said:
...I may consider that in lieu of gifts, especially since most of my guests will be from the States so it would be difficult to register with a store down there. I guess I could register up here, but then guests would need to purchase a gift while in town which would be a pain too.
You don't have any of the same stores? That's too bad. If you two aren't a fan of cake I've seen some people do several pies, but you may want to consider cupcakes as your guests might be fans of cake and it's the perfect way to not have to have a full cake. I think, even if you aren't fond of cake, you should still do something because of they symbolism, but we're having a fairly traditional wedding in that aspect so it's just my style.
 

Trail Nazi

Cyburbian
Messages
2,779
Points
24
nerudite said:
I have a question for everyone. Would it be a huge travesty if we didn't have a wedding cake? I know it's kind of a tradition to cut the cake/feed each other or whatever. But neither of us really like cake that much. Has anyone been to a wedding where they did something else besides cake? Can you tell I'm not much of a traditionalist?
I just discovered this really cool local bakery the other day and for fun, I had to look at their cake book in which there were a few examples of non-traditional cake ideas. One was the cupcake on a tiered platform thingy and another was individual wedding cake shaped decorated cookies. The cookies were so cute, they all looked a little different.

nerudite said:
Heh... yeah no doubt! They actually have honeymoon wedding registries around. I may consider that in lieu of gifts, especially since most of my guests will be from the States so it would be difficult to register with a store down there. I guess I could register up here, but then guests would need to purchase a gift while in town which would be a pain too.

You can register with Target and a few other stores online and never have to go into the stores. Very awesome thing. We did that for the baby shower. (It was the only way I could control what was put on the registry since my husband ran off with the scanner and put things like the Star Wars light saber remote control on the registry. It was pretty cool but it didn't have a light beam come out. :( )
 
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Messages
5,353
Points
31
Speaking of registries, has anyone heard of or participated in the bridal home mortgage registry? It's set up where people can put money in the registry to help the couple buy a home.
 

nerudite

Cyburbian
Messages
6,544
Points
30
Trail Nazi said:
One was the cupcake on a tiered platform thingy and another was individual wedding cake shaped decorated cookies. The cookies were so cute, they all looked a little different.
Now that's a cool idea! I was thinking maybe little fruit & custard tarts or something would work too... or for Canadians, butter tarts ;)

Trail Nazi said:
You can register with Target and a few other stores online and never have to go into the stores. Very awesome thing.
Yeah, but unfortunately most online places in the States don't ship to Canada. I guess if I found one up here and if it were accessible online, then that would work too. I haven't really found a store up here that I like as much as the ones in the States though, but (oh darn), I guess I'll have to go on a window shopping spree sometime soon. ;)
 

donk

Cyburbian
Messages
6,970
Points
30
nerudite said:
Now that's a cool idea! I was thinking maybe little fruit & custard tarts or something would work too... or for Canadians, butter tarts ;)
Only if they are layered between nanaimo bars.
 
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