I wrote a paper on gay marriage a few years back. It was required for some class. In the paper, I talked about an article I had read in Money magazine some time before that. The article was about a couple that were living together and expecting a baby. One was an artist and they were basically "hippie" types and kind of anti-establishment. The article detailed their trials with trying to arrange medical insurance, joint custody, life insurance, and a zillion other things. The boyfriend had started telling people his "wife" was pregnant because when he said his "girlfriend" was pregnant, he got "oh, sorry" rather than "congrats". He was tired of explaining that it was a happy occasion for them. By the end of the article, they were considering getting married because that was the simple solution to their thousand and one problems.
More recently, I mentioned that same article in a class I took on campus. The professor said that there is something like 160-some-odd rights associated with marriage, package deal. Then he told a few horror stories about gay couples and their utter lack of rights. One couple had lived together for many years -- like 2 decades -- and one of them died and the house legally was inherited by the dead guy's parents. The parents lovingly threw the remaining man out into the street with little more than the clothes on his back.
Bob, you may not be trying to be a bigot but to quote Yoda: there is no try, there is only do or do not. I know for a fact that there are members of this forum who are not straight. They may not say anything to your face because people like you make it dangerous for them to admit their sexual orientation. And I really can't continue without starting a flame war. I cannot think of a polite way to make any of my other points. Sigh.