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Your Graffiti Suggestions, Please.

Gedunker

Moderating
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
11,485
Points
41
Calling all Cyburbian Wags!!!

I intend to tag the following 8.5" x 11" white officer paper sign taped to the Men's Room door:

"As Soon As Closer Arrives
Bill Will Install It.

Sorry for any Inconvenience.

Pull Door Closed.

Thank You"

Here's the deal: six WEEKS ago, the automatic closer on the women's bathroom door (pun warning) shot craps (pun warning expired). The ladies freaked and maintenance switched the operable men's room closer with the women's.

These are public restrooms in a public building. You know what I'm saying?

The door has no handle, so to close it as you leave, you must place your fingers in a dangerous position.

I'm not a prude, but six weeks seems a little long.

So this is my invitation to you, oh great humorists of Cyburbia, to become an accomplice. Give it your best shot. I'll announce a winner later.
 

Jessie-J

Cyburbian
Messages
386
Points
12
Why are Aussies better than the French?

Because they kiss like the French but down under.
 

BiteMeElmo

Cyburbian
Messages
324
Points
11
"If you want to make a stink, use these facilities. If you want to make a REAL stink, report these facilities"

EDIT: Or, you could use one of the classics:

"Please do not throw toothpicks into the urinal. The crabs can pole vault"
 

Mastiff

Gunfighter
Messages
7,181
Points
30
Due to a situation beyond out control, the men's roon door must remain open during business hours.


(That ought to do it...)
 

Richmond Jake

You can't fight in here. This is the War Room!
Messages
18,313
Points
44
This room is like the contents of your computer: You enjoy no expectations of privacy.
 

el Guapo

Capitalist
Messages
5,995
Points
31
I'd be flying my freak flag, if you know what I mean. One look at Herr Gucklich and the the damn thing would be fixed.
 

Cardinal

Cyburbian
Messages
10,080
Points
34
So can someone explain to me why it is somehow appropriate for the men's restroom door to not work, but not the women's? Why the switch?

The solution is not a paper on, but an audio on. You need to make a tape of some very crude bathroom sounds, hide a speaker in there, and play it throughout the day. It may work best if you can control it remotely and shut it off when maintenance or management go in there to look for it. The noise will generate enough anger or embarrassment for somebody to fix it.
 

el Guapo

Capitalist
Messages
5,995
Points
31
Get all the men in there and sing and dance this number: "I wanna stay at the Y M C A...." Break and then go in to: "In the Navy..."

The squeeky wheel gets the grease.
 

Gedunker

Moderating
Staff member
Moderator
Messages
11,485
Points
41
All very good, but nothing I'm willing to risk a Class D misdemeanor for yet.

Jessie-J said:
Because they kiss like the French but down under.
Why am I having these pleasurable lesbian images all of a sudden?
 

Jeff

Cyburbian
Messages
4,161
Points
27
Get the nastiest dude in your office to house some wings and beers at lunch, have him hit the mens room about 3 pm and not flush. Prop door open, leave open.
 

Seabishop

Cyburbian
Messages
3,838
Points
25
Our public bathroom has a large handicapped accessible stall with a ladder that leads up to the roof. The little door on the ceiling is always open. That means if you are using the stall somebody could potentially climb down from the roof into the stall.
 
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